Satire

I Vigorously And Humbly Seek Thy Favor

Verily I sayeth unto the Gods or Goddesses of curation

Lo, my dearest Gods and Goddesses of creation hast thou forsaken me in a time of my most dread desire? Did I not heed your wishes, follow your commandments and forbear all those writing sins as you dictated from your lofty throne in Curation Heaven?

I am but your humble servant, a mere soul who you have allowed to write in these hallowed halls. Where once, you cast your creation benevolence upon me many times, your curations of my efforts resplendent, shining down from the Curation Heavens upon me, filling me with rapture and the glorious feeling of your omnipresence.

It was beautiful. It was pure and whole and forever, and I felt I could go forth, freed from penance, a pulchritudinous follower.

And yet, as I walk through this valley of the shadow of non-curation, you seek to smite me as if I am a heathen once again, a pauper, verily I say unto you, you seek to stamp me out with your foot as if I were a lowly tax collector.

You asked me to follow your teachings, to believe in your purity and wholesomeness, and I do. I am your humble flummoxed servant, and yet although I follow your commands, you’ve not shown interest in me and the words of praise I have lifted up in sacrifice to you for a period of six fortnites.

Six entire fortnites of feeling as if a pox has been cast upon me. Six fortnites of you and the whole host of heavenly curators ignoring my prayers and words of contrite pleading for forgiveness.

And yet lo, you hasten to look the other way and still teach me to turn the other cheek and write something else. You command that I continue to offer you my words, so that you may chastise my work with the ignominy of silence.

Is this how a God or Goddess treats one who worships you?

I would have thought perhaps I was relegated to a lessor God/Goddess, but then you adorn many other disciples with your blessings. Hath ye not? Yea, I have witnessed the multitudes of other followers who receive curation blessings from your heavenly abode.

And yet thou seeketh to humiliate and shame me. Pray tell me what scurrilous atrocity I have performed that would have you ignore me so?

Verily I pray ye Curation Gods and Goddesses. Lift up thy feet from my punishment. Suffer curation unto me, an innocent believer who once you adorned with curation after curation.

I beseech ye, curate me again. Ignoreth me not, for I wish to dwell in the house of curation forever as one of your most ardent believers.

Amen,

P.G. Barnett

Thank you so much for reading. You didn’t have to, but I’m certainly glad you did.

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© P.G. Barnett, 2020. All Rights Reserved.