I Tried To Scam a Scammer
It was all fun and games until it got personal.
It was a quiet afternoon in the office when my phone rang, not only was I excited because I am an extrovert, but I knew it was a scam, and I was excited to pretend I believe them. I wanted to waste their time.
Better me than your grandma.
We talked for about 35 minutes. I had to mute my phone to laugh every 45 seconds with my coworkers.
I was pretending to be scared when he said:
“You owe the government of Canada 47 billion dollars, and there is a warrant for your arrest.”
I told him my name was Rebecca, and that I didn’t understand how this was possible.
“I work minimum wage!”
I started to fake cry, as I do. I should have been an actress.
I asked him if he would give me a moment to collect myself. I took this time to let out the biggest laugh I could. All my coworkers were busting at the seems as I let on that I would transfer him as much money as he wanted.
After 25 minutes of playing with his head, I laid down the law.
“My father is the chief of police.” I quickly looked up the chief of police in my area.
I gave him the name and asked if he knew him? I can barely keep myself together at this point. He told me that he knew him and that he would call him for me. Impressive, who is he calling? After a short 3 minutes, he returned. I started to ask him about his family.
“Do you have a wife?” and “How is your mom?”
Finally, I ended it with:
“Does she know you scam innocent grannies.”
He stopped talking; I had to say hello a few times.
He said: “No, she doesn’t know. And I don’t have a wife.”
His voice got quiet; a sadness came over him like I had struck a chord. His emotional response isn’t where I saw this going. Typically when I catch them in their game, they tell me off and call me some derogatory name. But this was different; he almost sounded sad.
I tried to talk some sense into him, hoping that maybe something I said would stop him from continuing this work. I asked him how much he had scammed today and made him think about what he’s doing to people’s families. I am sure they train them not to feel anything towards Canadians.
Abruptly, he told me he had to go and asked me a simple question.
“Can I call you sometime?”
I stopped for a second and thought about what this question meant. The extrovert in me didn’t let me feel very long.
“Of course, anytime.”
Weeks passed, and I had forgotten about my Indian scammer friend. Until one day, 3 weeks later, my phone rang. Again out of excitement, I picked up right away.
“Hello?”
“Do you remember me.”
“No idea, who’s this.”
“It’s Jordan, the guy who tried to scam you.”
Ahh, yes, now it’s clicking, wait for a second, is the scammer calling me back?
“Oh yes, I remember, so have you quit scamming?”
He hadn’t, and that was ok. I was curious about his lifestyle, why did he choose to scam kind Canadians and our elderly, who are so vulnerable to scams like this.
My new friend Jordan told me:
“I owed my cousin a favor, and now I do this for him. I don’t enjoy it, but I must repay my debt.”
His vulnerability with me felt like a warm hug. As if his struggle could be felt thousands of miles away. He knew it wasn’t honest work, but he understood that this is what he had to do to repay his cousin.
My heart broke; I had to change the subject.
“How’s quarantine going for you?”
Jordan told me about the break up with his recent girlfriend; she left him for another man that made more money than him.
“What’s wrong with women?” He asked me
“If only I knew.”
For some strange reason, probably because I am an extrovert, Jordan and I spoke for over an hour.
He told me about where he grew up, his life in India, and his family.
I started to think, did Jordan need to open up to someone that has no relation to his regular daily life. All I wanted to do was grab him through the phone and shake him.
“HELLO, YOU ARE SCAMMING GRANNIES, STOP THAT!”
I never said that. I did, however, listen and give all the advice I could. I thought maybe this was a cry for help, the least I could do was listen to his worries and sorrows.
I had to go and told Jordan in the softest voice I could:
“Hey, call me anytime. I am always here to listen.”
As I hung up the phone, I felt shocked, sad, and then I laughed. Did a scammer just call me?
I thought about Jordan for a while; in fact, it’s been nearly two months since he called, and I still think about him.
I often wonder how he is doing, and if he’s ok. I think of my friend the scammer and smile for two reasons:
- I took nearly 2 hours from his time that he could have been scamming grannies.
- He felt that he could be vulnerable around me. And that is the greatest gift you can give someone.
I hope someday Jordan stops scamming and thinks of me when he does. I may never hear from Jordan again, and that’s ok.
I will never forget the time I had with him and will cherish the short memories he gave me. He taught me a lesson I didn’t even know I needed.
We are all human, we make mistakes, it doesn’t make us a bad person, it just makes us human. — Jordan