I Tried the Most Popular Billionaire Morning Routine and Here’s What Happened

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to calm their minds. I gave it a shot but sitting alone with my thoughts for 10 minutes felt like an eternity in the bad place. Checking social media to avoid responsibilities was definitely more my speed.</li><li>Exercise or do yoga. Namaste in bed. The only yoga I could muster was downward-facing dog under the covers. Maybe I’ll plank for 10 seconds after I take the scenic route to the fridge.</li><li>Drink water with lemon. Tried it — didn’t suddenly feel like a wealthy mogul. A venti oat milk chai seemed more appropriate.</li><li>Plan out your day and set goals. My goal is to keep my sanity through this morning. Then Nintendo Switch for the win!</li><li>Read news articles to stay informed. I figured reading my horoscope would give sufficient business insights to manage a multi-billion dollar investment portfolio. My fortune said to avoid risky ventures, so looks like I’m playing it safe

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today!</li><li>Spend time with family or loved ones. If by “loved ones” you mean my bed, then absolutely.</li><li>Take a cold shower or ice bath. Nice try, Elon Musk — I’m not trying to reenact the Titanic at a time like this.</li><li>Check emails and notifications. Only 78 new TikTok notifications? I clearly need to step up my game.</li><li>Eat a healthy breakfast. A McMuffin and some Oreos technically check the boxes of containing grains and antioxidants from dark chocolate. That counts as a billionaire breakfast, right?</li></ol>By 9am, I had already failed nearly every task but came to the conclusion that being a billionaire is overrated. Sure you may be financially thriving, but you’re also waking up at ungodly hours to eat lemons and have cold showers! Hard pass. I’ll stick to my non-billionaire lifestyle, thank you very much. It clearly suits me better.</article></body>

I don’t know if this life is for me

As a non-billionaire, I figured I should try living like one to expedite my finances. So I attempted the typical billionaire morning routine with interesting results:

Wake up early at a set time. Yeah, 4am is a hard pass. I chose 7am but barely crawled out of bed by 7:30 and still wanted to sue my alarm clock for emotional damages.

Meditate or practice mindfulness. Supposedly, billionaires meditate to calm their minds. I gave it a shot but sitting alone with my thoughts for 10 minutes felt like an eternity in the bad place. Checking social media to avoid responsibilities was definitely more my speed.

Exercise or do yoga. Namaste in bed. The only yoga I could muster was downward-facing dog under the covers. Maybe I’ll plank for 10 seconds after I take the scenic route to the fridge.

Drink water with lemon. Tried it — didn’t suddenly feel like a wealthy mogul. A venti oat milk chai seemed more appropriate.

Plan out your day and set goals. My goal is to keep my sanity through this morning. Then Nintendo Switch for the win!

Read news articles to stay informed. I figured reading my horoscope would give sufficient business insights to manage a multi-billion dollar investment portfolio. My fortune said to avoid risky ventures, so looks like I’m playing it safe today!

Spend time with family or loved ones. If by “loved ones” you mean my bed, then absolutely.

Take a cold shower or ice bath. Nice try, Elon Musk — I’m not trying to reenact the Titanic at a time like this.

Check emails and notifications. Only 78 new TikTok notifications? I clearly need to step up my game.

Eat a healthy breakfast. A McMuffin and some Oreos technically check the boxes of containing grains and antioxidants from dark chocolate. That counts as a billionaire breakfast, right?

By 9am, I had already failed nearly every task but came to the conclusion that being a billionaire is overrated. Sure you may be financially thriving, but you’re also waking up at ungodly hours to eat lemons and have cold showers! Hard pass. I’ll stick to my non-billionaire lifestyle, thank you very much. It clearly suits me better.