I Tried THC Sex Honey
Here’s what happened.
Before you get any naughty ideas…
No, I didn’t dress up in a red shirt and pretend I was Winnie The Pooh.
Get your mind out of the gutter people!
The Backstory
Julie works at a legal marijuana dispensary and I’ve learned a lot since she started working there about a year ago.
I even wrote a blog about it.
Julie will bring home different products from work so I can try them and tell her how they made me feel. She does this so she can pass this review on to her customers to help them make a more informed purchase.
Normally, she will bring home basic edibles of different brands. Occasionally I’ll get a vape pen or some flower but most of the time I’m the edible guy.
If it tastes like ass I’m going to be the first one to let her know.
This time she brought home “THC Sex Honey” for me to try.
I read the description on the package.
“Sex Hunny is a honey-based syrup that contains all natural-herbs accompanied by a dose of cannabis. These herbs have been studied and show an improvement in libido. The honey is meant to help libido for both men and women.”
I’m a 30-year-old man and my sex drive is still functioning as intended. I thought “what the hell?” I slid the packages out of the box and guzzled down both packages.
It was chocolate-flavored wildflower honey so it tasted like straight cocoa powder mixed with honey. It was like eating Nutella that had gone bad. I chugged my mountain dew to make sure it went down. I couldn’t see my face but I imagine I looked like I just swallowed a mouthful of vomit.
Now I had to wait thirty minutes to three hours to see if the effects work.
It was at this moment Julie came into the living room and informed me that she was going to be taking a nap because she had a headache.
Fuck.
I forgot to tell her I was trying the sex honey!
The Effects
“No big deal.” I thought as she walked out of the room. It takes a while for an edible to take effect so I might still be able to pull this off.
I turned on some T.V. and leaned back in my chair.
Nothing yet.
Thirty minutes passed.
Still nothing.
An hour passes.
I start to feel a little buzzed but not high.
That’s when I hear my phone start buzzing in my pocket.
My Uncle is calling me. I answer and while I’m talking to him I feel my eyes start to sag. My brain is finally starting to feel the effects of the THC sex honey at the worst possible time.
My Uncle keeps talking while I try to keep my cool.
“Uh-huh. Yep.” I say.
I’m starting to lose my attention span and think about… other things.
He finally gets done talking and tells me he’s going to start cooking dinner.
“Thank God.” I think to myself as I hang up the phone.
I’m about ready to hump anything that even resembles a pair of tits.
I go back to the bedroom and slide into bed.
Julie snores quite loud next to me. I know that if I wake her up now it will be a death sentence. I would like to keep my balls so I can use them later. I start scrolling through Medium and reading articles. That should keep my mind off of things.
Another hour passes.
I can feel the sex honey coursing through my body making everything I touch feel wonderful. I’ve never taken Molly but I imagine the feelings would be the same.
Julie turns over and my ears perk up.
“Please be awake, please be awake.” I think to myself.
I start rubbing her back.
She makes good sounds. Those sounds make the sex honey kick into overdrive.
She wakes up and asks “Did you take that sex honey?”
I didn’t think it was THAT obvious but apparently, she knew.
Finally, I can put on some Marvin Gaye and buy that ticket to Pound Town.
The Aftermath
The sex honey did what it said it would do. It put me in the mood.
The next morning even though I wasn’t high anymore my libido was still significantly higher.
If you find that you can choke down the terrible chocolate-flavored sex honey it works like a charm.
It took me back to my high school days when I wanted to hump anything that moved.
I don’t recommend taking phone calls while on the stuff. I mean if you can have a decent conversation while constantly thinking about tits then you are a better man than me.
If you are looking for something a little different I recommend giving “THC sex honey” a go.
Just make sure you let your partner know that you are taking it.
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