Life Stories

I Nearly Let Pursuit For Success Ruin My Life

Here’s what I learned.

Like many other twenty-somethings, I always had the goal to go out and make a name for myself.

I first graduated from a top university in the UK, before spending time in China learning about one of the most important economies in the business world. I had a goal to get to the top.

I then started my career working for some of the largest multinationals, always chasing opportunities to move to the next level. But every time, I found an element of unfulfillment in these roles. So at the same time as this, I decided to set up my own company.

I was inspired to make something from scratch. Be my own boss and all that. I was instantly attracted to the idea of setting up an online business and running it from home. I watched hours of videos online about it and felt this energy to get started right away.

I took $2k of my savings and instantly invested it into stock, registered a sole trader, and then I was off. This was my chance to make it happen once and for all. Change my future. I felt a huge wave of energy hit me. I had never felt anything like this in any job I had previously. Pure motivation to do this.

Every month I would invest all I could into stock to sell online. I was going to make this work and NOTHING was going to stop me.

But at the same time, I needed to pay rent and daily expenses. So my day job couldn’t go. I was balancing this new venture with a very time-consuming, stressful job.

My days consisted of working the day job, then rushing back to collect stock. I would then pack it up, list it on Amazon or eBay, and run to the post office. I would forego nights out with friends and pass over that very important family time. Weekends were a thing of the past. My social life was non-existent. I had a girlfriend who I would sometimes see, but would always rush off in the morning as I felt guilty that I was ‘wasting time’ and still had so much to do.

After about 6 months of doing this non-stop, I found myself in almost no-mans-land. Not only was I struggling at work and my attitude and work rate was decreasing by the day, but I was also started losing faith and some days didn’t have any energy for important business activities.

I was well and truly burned out. Stuck in between two career paths. I wanted to work for myself, but I didn’t want to give up the comfort of a monthly paycheck and the ability to indulge. The reality was, I wanted it, but not enough.

I would question whether or not I had what it takes or this was what I actually wanted. Was I tired of the pursuit of getting rich? I was making a bit of money here and there, but the reality is, starting a new business is not easy as rewards do not happen overnight.

To scale this type of business, it is a necessity to not take any money out and reinvest it into the business. Do this over and over again for years and then you may be able to quit your job. Admittedly, I was blindsided by this. With all the hype on YouTube and other sources about being able to get rich and quit your job, I was convinced that if I put the work in, that would happen quickly. I was naïve and although I have learned a lot of valuable skills from the experience, the outcome I was driving for did not materialize.

About 1 year into this, I decided to call it quits. I still do the odd sourcing at certain periods of the year will look for some deals to see what’s out there, but it is not a consistent pursuit. Consistency in every aspect of life is key. But I found striving to be consistent came at a cost.

Not only did I sacrifice time with key people, but I had also forgotten to take time off to enjoy life. I stopped watching and playing sports which I well and truly loved. I thought doing this would take valuable time out of building my empire. I also stopped trying at work to the point where it was hard to even go into the office after a while. I was daring to be great and suffering as a consequence. But it wasn’t worth it. I started to resent the fact that I had to reply to emails or source deals as it was eating away all of my time and energy.

When I called it a day, I no longer felt all these feelings of guilt. I simply felt relieved. It was time to get my life back. It didn’t work out the way I wanted it to. And I was completely ok with that.

I think my story highlights the downside of ‘hustle culture’. I agree that if you want something, you need to put the work in and go for it. But this cant come at the cost of losing valuable relationships and having no time to sit back and enjoy life. I have learned along the way I am someone who struggles with balance. I envy people who can have a ‘side hustle’, but still can invest time into other aspects of life, such as social time, exercise, and relationships. Going ‘all in’ and ‘burning the ships’ may work for some people. But for me, it just completed derailed me, led to burnout and demotivation for both my career, business, and most importantly life.

I have stepped back and am much happier now because of it. A part of me always has an itch to go back and set something up. But I promised myself if I do, it will not come in the way of having a rich and happy life, regardless of the financial results I achieve.