Summary

A young, inexperienced, and religiously conservative man recounts a harrowing adventure in Georgian nightlife, where his search for romantic experiences leads to a series of encounters with prostitution and a dangerous situation in a strip club, ultimately teaching him valuable life lessons.

Abstract

The narrative follows the protagonist's journey from a sheltered past to a transformative experience in Georgia, where he seeks to break out of his shell and explore romantic endeavors. Initially, his attempts to connect with women in Tbilisi nightclubs inadvertently lead him to prostitutes, despite his intention to avoid transactional relationships. The turning point occurs in a strip club, where his naivety and lack of awareness of local customs put him in a perilous situation. Miraculously, his honest profession as an English teacher earns him the sympathy of the strip club owner, who spares him from potential harm. Reflecting on the incident a decade later, the author concludes that while his actions were misguided, the experience was a crucial part of his personal growth and that such "mistakes" can be valuable learning opportunities.

Opinions

The author believes that his initial lack of experience with women led to his subsequent misadventures in Georgia.
He expresses a naive surprise at the prevalence of prostitution in Tbilisi nightclubs, which were disguised as regular venues.
The author admits to feeling genuine attraction and connection with a woman at a jazz bar, only to discover she was also a prostitute, revealing his vulnerability to deception.
His decision to enter a strip club despite sensing danger reflects a mix of curiosity and poor judgment.
The author's encounter with the strip club's staff and the subsequent threat of violence highlight his fear and the gravity of the situation he found himself in.
The author's honesty and appeal to the strip club owner's personal connections ultimately saved him from harm, suggesting a belief in the power of shared human experiences to transcend potentially dangerous situations.
He reflects on the incident with humor and humility, acknowledging his mistakes but also recognizing the value of the lessons learned from them.
The author promotes his other writing platforms and endorses an AI service, indicating a self-assuredness in the value of his narrative and the relevance of his experiences to a broader audience.

Globetrotters

I Nearly Died in a Georgian Strip Club

Bad decisions made in seedy places

Growing up, I was a shy kid and also a religious one. Throughout my college years when others were partying, I was doing board game nights. It was fun, for sure, but not the wild experimental ride lots of others go through to find themselves.

By the time I was in my mid-20s, I was vastly inexperienced with women and immensely sexually frustrated. Around this time I hopped over to the nation of Georgia to teach English but I was also resolute to get out of my shell and date, fool around, to do something that I had never really done before.

For most of my time there I lived in a small, conservative village. The girl next door liked me, and I her, but Georgia is the kind of place where if you sleep with someone, you are expected to marry them and that was something I wasn’t looking for.

Georgian nightlife, a cautionary tale

During Christmas vacation, I spent a week in Tbilisi, the capital city. I was ready to get out and meet people and have fun. So I hit the nightclubs, called discos there.

The first one I went into was 99% women…..this never happens, the gods are never this good. The weird thing was, that nobody was dancing. They were kind of just hanging back looking like they wanted someone to approach. And the approach, I did.

The first woman I talked to seemed interested, suspiciously so, although I didn’t pick up on that. After a few minutes of dancing I say let's get out of here, she says sure. Right when we get outside she goes “That’ll be $300.” Ok, so she was a prostitute no big deal I’ll go back inside and talk to someone else. I’m not the kind of guy to give up even when something is obvious it's not going to end well so I talked to a few more girls and the same thing happened over and over.

All the places I went to were listed as normal nightclubs on travel site recommendations but in reality four of the clubs I hit that night were all the same, fronts for prostitution.

The next night I hit a bar with a chill South African guy. Not a whole lot of girls to talk to so eventually I went my own way (he was engaged) and ended up in a dimly lit jazz bar.

There was a very attractive, dark-haired, absolute goddess at the bar by herself. I didn’t talk to her because I hadn’t yet reached a liquid confidence peak from my beer. For some reason, I started swirling the beer around like a wine glass and she made fun of me for that, and the start of an hour-long conversation began.

We hit the dance floor in a way that would make my mother blush and bounce out of there. Right before we get in the taxi to my place she says “So how much you wanna pay?”

Strip club of doom

I thought we had an authentic connection only to find out that I fell for the trap again. Feeling shitty I started walking around the nightlife area, which is almost non-existent as it is.

When I turned a corner I saw an eye-scorching neon sign lit up with a girl in a bikini outline. I thought to myself, “fuck it, let's go in.”

I had never been in a place like that before. My heart was pounding through to the floor. A giant of a man was guarding the front door. Bulging muscles, bald head, earpiece, and slick suit. But he gave me a wide smile and welcomed me inside. Even shook my hand when I said I was an American.

As I was seated I noticed there were no other customers. There also was no price list set anywhere. I, like a child, told the bouncer guy I only had $100 to which he said “No problem, no problem.”

A woman is brought out to meet me and my heart just sinks. Not because she wasn’t attractive, but because I immediately realized how dumb I was being. She looked beat up beyond her years, a scar on her face and a look that just said she was not having a good time.

I wanted to get out of there but the animal part of me won out and I got a lap dance. Didn’t feel anything during it, I was more just like “Well, OK, that’s an experience.”

When I get up to pay I’m told the bill, for a five-minute lap dance and nothing else, not even a drink, it would be $500……

Do you know the feeling when your soul leaves your body? Like you’re just floating in place? I was dead scared. When I told the server I didn’t have the money, four guys came out and surrounded me. One of them was the nice jacked bouncer from outside, who wasn’t nice anymore.

I tried to say hey I told you guys I only had $100! That did not go over well.

The main guy, maybe the owner said: “You are American, why you no pay? Of course, you have money. Just go to your hotel and get more money.”

Me: “I have no more money”

Owner: “I don’t believe. You are American, you go get money. They go with you.” The bouncers squeezed in around me.

I don’t think I’ve ever been more afraid in my whole life. I saw no way out of it. Somehow by the grace of God, Odin, the Great Spirit in the Sky, I began explaining how I was just an English teacher in this small village and all I wanted to do was help the future of this beautiful country.

And it worked.

The owner’s expression changed. “I know that place! I have sister that age. You are good man. OK you can go.”

And just like that the big dudes parted from around me and let me out of there. The second I got outside I bolted back to where I was staying, being sure to take sudden turns down alleys. Although they most definitely were not following me I wasn’t taking any chances.

I was staying at an older Canadian couple’s apartment who were colleagues of mine. I hadn’t planned on losing all my money so, to get home the next day, I had to ask the couple if I could borrow $20 for bus fare, humiliating.

In the end, mistakes aren’t that bad

I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with the kinds of places I went to. More so, you just have to be more aware of the sorts of situations you find yourself in and don’t assume that everyone wants to be your friend.

It all worked out and I look back at this story fondly for entertainment. That’s only because a decade has already passed since it happened. So maybe our “mistakes”, though not the best for us, are also not so bad. Provided the Georgian strip club owner you run into just so happens to respect English teachers.

Thank you for reading! If you like what you read, please check out my other articles here. I also write on my Substack “Ninja Nomad”, with a focus on Japan with occasional stories from other locations in North-East Asia.