MWC DEATH, LIFE LESSONS, TRANSFORMATION
I Lost My Job and Found My Freedom
“Waiting For Her Moment To Be Free”
Rest in Peace Operations Finance Manager for she hath done what she could during this phase of her life. The headstone was beautifully crafted from the finest blue and grey granite that money could buy. She deserves to have the best, after all, she worked diligently and dedicated her life to accomplishing nothing short of excellence.
Her headstone, which sat at the edge of a mound overlooking a vast serene lake, was surrounded by stunning bouquets of white peonies, 11 flowerpots with blue moth orchids, and one single white lotus flower accented the top of the smoothly curved granite marker.
Not your typical floral arrangement for a newly erected headstone, but this was no day of sorrow or mourning. Instead, it was a day of celebration, a rebirth even, for she hath lost her identity when her career came to a crashing end, but in the midst of the chaos, she discovered her pathway to freedom.
After 11 years of commitment to the corporate America system, I lost my job on 9/22/2020. As my ex-boss sat stoically and delivered the news to me, I instantly became overwhelmed with feelings of emptiness. It was as if bits and pieces of me died a slow and painful death, but in hindsight, those pieces were merely sections of my life that no longer created joy. This career that I invested my time and energy into had been reduced to a mundane sequence of daily activities, a means by which I was able to survive and live the life I desired comfortably.
But comfort didn’t necessarily equate to happiness or peace of mind. A life lesson that I have gained after discovering my pathway to freedom. Instead of allowing the loss to manifest into chaos or turmoil, I chose the opposite, and I silently ended that chapter of the journey by sacrificing and detaching from my old life and opening my heart to embrace new beginnings.
Death is a form of freedom. Throughout the journey of our lives, we gain various understandings of death. For some, death comes with heaviness coupled with a dark emotional state, or perhaps it is viewed as the conclusion, the final chapter of a life once lived. For others, death is a rebirth, a new start, or a new beginning; a transitional gateway to a higher level of being.
“If we can understand that death is not the end but is really a transition into the next life, the great part of life, that frees us up into receiving God’s courage and his help.”— Max Lucado
Personally, death represents freedom, a transformation from one state to another. Liberation from life or circumstance that no longer serves a purpose at this point in my journey.
It takes courage to gain the freedom to transcend to the next level of life. The courage that I had lost while trapped in the web of a mundane system. I became complacent, too comfortable with the way things flowed, and I completely lost sight of who I was in the process.
I evolved into a fearful people pleaser, someone with low self-worth who looked to others for validation and fake confidence. Though I had the power, the position, and the status, deep inside I was an empty vessel, a robotic shell addicted to the external stimuli in a complex world. Consequently, I grew too afraid to free myself from that state of bondage and became entrapped in the perpetual cycle of my daily life.
Therefore, that version of myself needed to die, the Operations Finance Manager needed to be emancipated to clear the way for who I am today. Consequently, when that moment of freedom manifested into reality, I gladly accepted and embraced the death of my old self and buried her memories last September on that lovely Tuesday morning beside the quiet lakeside.
“Waiting for this moment to be free.” I believe that the death of my old self was a necessary circumstance so that it could unmask who I really am. No longer am I limited and trapped by old conditioning, instead, I am free to think and feel authentically. I believe all things work together for good and I have gained some deep understanding of the life that I have been gifted.
I lost my job in corporate America and discovered my freedom. I discovered the purpose of this life that I have been granted. Though I was stripped of my old identity, I fully step into and embrace this new one because she is genuine, confident, compassionate, kind, with a powerful voice and a clear and precise mind. She is ready to face the world boldly because all her life she had been waiting for her moment to be free.
“Death is only the end to the illusion; it is a gateway to transcend and evolve into something greater than your current state of being.” — Melanie J
Thank you for reading and thank you to all the editors of ILLUMINATION.
