I Live in Fear of Noise
And I refuse to think I’m not fitted for living in a society

I wish respect for silence were part of Human Rights because I live in fear of noise. Not the pleasant sound of falling rain, the leaves of a tree singing, or the sizzle of burning wood. To the noise that people generate. As an introvert, I’ve always preferred silence. I understand that I will not always be able to enjoy it. The problem is when humans exceed the normal limits of tolerance.
“Open your mouth only if what you are going to say is more beautiful than silence” — Arabic Proverb.
As if that weren’t enough, don’t call attention to noisy people! The problem is still with you.
- “You’re not fit to live in a society.”
- “You should go live in a house on a hill.”
- “You’re crazy.”
URGH! Have you ever been told something similar?
A list of noisy frustrations
Of course, we have to take into account the country where we live. Nordic culture is supposedly more quiet and silent, whereas as a Spaniard — living in the second loudest country in the world —, I suffer mishaps with noise daily.
Even so, I’m sure that many of you will coincide with me in a series of noisy events that can destroy (yes, destroy) your life. Or maybe just a good session of study, work, sleep, rest due to illness, or just a well-deserved relaxation.
The Coronavirus pandemic has taught us to respect personal space. Will we need another virus to learn to respect silence?
What is the use of listing them? Probably nothing. The reason here is to vent our frustrations, and since society doesn’t support us, to put our position on record. So, here’s the list of the noisy things that at some point tore me apart. I just hope it serves to raise awareness of how annoying noise can be and how easy it would be to have common sense:
1. Musicians rehearsing
Oh, I love music. But I don’t need to roll down my car window for you to admire it. I also don’t need to blast it out in my house. When I enjoy it the most is when I listen to it in my headphones. I isolate myself from everything. I live in the present moment. And besides, I won’t bother you. Furthermore, I love to sing, but I won’t do it until I soundproof my rehearsal room. I exaggerate? Or am I simply having the respect that you do not have for me, musicians from Planet Earth?
The solution? If you have enough money and consideration, you don’t even have to soundproof an entire room because a soundproof box works fine. However, if you don’t have enough money, play your instruments or sing only in your class/rehearsal room.
2. Babies, children, and the elderly
There are adorable. Or are they not? I will be a rare species because I don’t like them. But, wait, maybe what I don’t like is having to listen to their insufferable noises. I don’t have to like hearing a newborn cry every half hour while I sleep. Nor the loud voice of a deaf old grandparent to who you have not known how to pay attention to. Or the noise of your children playing with a ball that is bouncing against the walls of my house incessantly.
The solution? Put your beloved ones in the same soundproof box I recommend for musicians. Doesn’t work? Doesn’t have the money or space? I guess that only education remains, and I understand that I don’t have to experience what doesn’t belong to me, nor have I decided to live. You can consider buying pacifiers for babies and wireless headphones for the elderly.
3. Festivities and social gatherings
Socializing is wonderful. But what would I give for there to be specific places for people to celebrate…! Away from the houses, soundproofed.
Isolated, they could get drunk happily and not have the streets dirty anymore. Everything would be advantages.
Can you imagine how happy the curfews and restrictions on meetings of people in my country made me due to the COVID-19? But, on the other hand, I have no words to describe the Spanish people partying in the streets, especially when they hide behind “tradition.” How unfortunate to say this, and how much it reveals to me about society.
The solution? Become an extrovert. Unfortunately, it’s too late for some of us. I may remain a Christmas Grinch.
4. Animals
A dog howling non-stop because their human companion has left home for many hours is annoying, but above all, it’s sad. It’s the noise that I bear with the most resignation because if there’re people who treat their animals like that, I don’t want to imagine their children.
Animals make noise, but at the same time, do you know that they can’t stand noise either? It will not be the first time an animal — mostly a dog — dies of a heart attack due to stress from firecrackers’ noise.
They are also victims.
The solution? Love and respect your pets. Find them a coach to educate them — and maybe educate you. Please do not leave them alone for more hours than they can support. Leave them with a family member or in a specific pet hotel if you go on a trip.
5. Flat neighbors
A terraced house has its drawbacks, but a poorly soundproofed flat is even worse. For me, not for them. Because I’m sure, all flat’s neighbors have a wonderful life. This is what I have been deducing throughout all these years:
- They have infinite friends and family.
- Their televisions have a desirable power.
- Their furniture has an extra drag capacity.
- They have perfect cleaning skills.
- Their heels are the finest in the world.
- The reforms of their homes are hyper-pleasant.
It seems I’m kidding, but no. Do I need to continue?
The solution? Cleaning tasks from 9:00 AM until 9:00 PM—soft adhesives on chair legs. Bring slippers around the house. If your family/friends come home EVERY day in heels, let them change for slippers at the entrance. Carry out home renovations within the permitted hours. Communicate with your neighbors about possible annoyances.
6. Bedtime!
I went on vacation this summer at a very cool eco-resort designed to rest and disconnect. And even there, the guest next to me decided to talk loudly on the phone at midnight! Luckily a few knocks on the wall deterred him. But next time, I should book a hotel designed to enjoy the noise, given what I’ve seen and heard.
That made me realize most humans adore making sounds at night at home. I don’t point to anyone: I’ve heard both teenagers and fifties. It also seems that going in a group transforms us and empowers us to raise our voices. And to lower my patience.
The solution? Put earplugs on. Have they ever worked for me? No. Still, my favorites are the silicone ones. And I’m thinking of getting some custom-made. It’s very simple: if you’re going to make noise, stop before midnight to let the rest of humanity sleep. And if you have a little more developed compassion, stop at 11:00 PM, in case someone gets up early the next day. It would be a nightmare for humans whispering from 11:00 PM to 9:00 AM?
A silent conclusion
I’ve practiced a lot of assertiveness with neighbors, family, and friends. It hasn’t been of much use to me, but I’ll always keep trying. Of course, you can disagree with me, but if I’ve made you ask yourself new things, I’m satisfied. Also, if you have specific legislation in your country about noise pollution, I would love to hear from you!
A person who doesn’t know how to be silent cannot bear loneliness. That’s something to overcome on an individual level. But respect is universal, and it’s synonymous with common sense, the least common of all the senses.
Meanwhile, I’ve learned to rewrite certain things. Hello, lovely neighbor!
- “Have you considered maybe it is you who cannot live in a society?”
- “You should go live in a house on a hill to yell with satisfaction; also, you’ll breathe very pure air for your lungs, let you keep screaming this powerful.”
- “You’re not crazy. I’m sorry, I refuse to think that. Let’s stop stigmatizing mental health. It’s just that noisy people like you are very rude.”