I Laughed When They Told Me Entrepreneurship Was a Mental Game

I thought a business game plan was enough to be successful

My 66-year-old father is an entrepreneur. I’ve watched him build businesses from the ground up my entire life. I’ve listened to him pitch too many business ideas to count and then successfully execute many of them, with a few failures along the way. Throughout it all, I continually told myself one thing: I never want to have my own business.

Guess what I do for a career today?

Surprise, I have my own copywriting business. I’m doing exactly what I thought I never wanted to do, and (spoiler alert) I love it!

So why did I deliberately state that I never want to be an entrepreneur? Because, at the time, I was operating under a lot of false beliefs.

I thought entrepreneurship meant that I had to be “on” constantly and could never turn my business brain off. That every outing, every activity suddenly became about “how can I apply this to my business?”

I modeled these limiting beliefs after what I saw my dad doing, and they almost stopped me from starting my business in the first place. Any psychologist worth their salt would probably tell you that’s why I created a business model that didn’t stifle me but provided freedom — a business where I could work less and make more.

But that’s not where my entrepreneurial journey started. In the beginning, I was working way too hard. In order to get to a “less is more” state, I had to break a lot more limiting beliefs, including the idea that “you have to work hard to make money.”

I thought that way because that’s what I grew up hearing — maybe you can relate? Those around me were constantly saying things like:

• “Hard work is the way.”
• “You have to do more to make more.”
• “You have to pay your dues and do stuff you don’t want to do before you get to be happy.”

When I started my business, all of these subconscious beliefs influenced me so much that I was working harder than I would have in a typical office job, yet making less money. I poured every bit of time and energy into my copywriting business, thinking it would take me where I wanted to go.

And yes, I eventually started working with great clients, making good money, and checking all the metaphorical boxes I believed a “successful entrepreneur” should encompass. But when I closed my eyes to sleep at night, I didn’t feel happy.

In fact, I was so stressed out and stretched thin that I could barely sleep. I constantly had too much client work on my plate and felt overburdened by the tasks on my to-do list. It wasn’t until I slowed down and started doing less that I opened the door to more.

You wouldn’t expect to exhale if you hadn’t inhaled

Part of my “doing less” routine involves a morning meditation, and it starts by reading Journey To The Heart by Melody Beattie. (If you don’t have this book already, I highly recommend you get it!) This morning, I read a perfect passage that sums everything up way better than I could:

“The inhaling is the breathing in life’s energy. The exhaling is the sharing of your resources. You wouldn’t expect to exhale if you hadn’t inhaled.” — Melody Beattie

In my previous mindset of “hard work is the way,” I was in a state of constant exhalation — giving endlessly, without pausing to replenish and take time for myself.

Now, I know that growing my business isn’t about applying secret marketing strategies or implementing plans. Sure, that helps, but real growth requires looking inward at my beliefs. And asking the uncomfortable questions. Questions like:

• Where am I holding myself back?
• What goals do I want to achieve?
• What bad things do I think will happen if I achieve these goals? (This one is key! It brings up all sorts of underlying beliefs you never knew existed.)

Then, it’s my job to clear those beliefs and give myself permission to act in spite of them.

For example, in order to get to the current stage in my business, I had to battle some very ingrained beliefs about making more money than my parents while working fewer hours. This brought up a lot of guilt, shame, and fear for me. I had to work through the discomfort of facing those emotions and letting them go. Had I instead let them rule me and dictate my actions, I wouldn’t be where I am today in my business.

Your beliefs influence your ability to build a business

Here’s another example to illustrate how entrepreneurship is a mind game: If you genuinely believe the only way you can hack it as an entrepreneur is by pulling 50+ hour weeks, then you’ll do it. No matter how many times you read 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss and think, “must be nice.”

Even if you see other people achieving success without 50+ hour weeks, you’ll find some way to justify it in your mind, like “that’s great for them, but it wouldn’t work for me.”, “My business is different.”, “I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I had all that free time anyway.”

You see what I mean. If you really take a moment to think about it, you’ll probably find that you’ve been doing this to yourself without even realizing it. (I certainly was!)

Actions you can take today to grow your business from a mental standpoint

If you’re reading this as an entrepreneur trying to grow their business, stop looking around for the perfect strategy and start looking towards the real solution: the thoughts floating around in your head.

Journal them out if you’re a writer. Record yourself talking with the voice app on your smartphone if you’re more comfortable speaking. The method doesn’t matter, as long as the introspection happens.

Go through the uncomfortable questions above every single week, and analyze the underlying beliefs you have about your business and your success as an entrepreneur. This alone will go a long way towards helping you get to the next level in your business — no fancy course, software, or marketing plan required!

After that, go grab yourself a copy of Chillpreneur: The New Rules for Creating Success, Freedom, and Abundance on Your Terms by Denise Duffield-Thomas. It’s a mini masterclass on money mindset for entrepreneurs. Reading it (okay, listening, I got the audiobook) helped me battle some beliefs I needed to face before I could advance in my business.

Bottom Line: Entrepreneurship is a mental game — and there’s no leveling up your business until you’re willing to get uncomfortable and level up your mindset.