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elancing while in college and is doing extremely well for himself — and he doesn’t hesitate to share exact processes rather than vague “be consistent” type posts. As a bonus, he adds food pics. I’m all about the food pics.</p><p id="df1b">And here on Medium, I love <a href="">Eve Arnold </a>for her part-time creator content. I love how she’s proving that you can make a great living online without quitting your day job. As someone who’s making a living while focusing on her art, there’s a lot to be said about the part-time life— and she’s definitely at the forefront of that movement.</p><h1 id="d795">Completing my book</h1><p id="9f60">The biggest gift I’ve given myself is permission to complete my book by the end of the year.</p><p id="e14f">Literary fiction can be the biggest slog. You need each story to be as perfectly perfect as it can be, and that requires a whooooole lot of concentration. Now that I’m taking a pause from full-time work, I’ve been able to devote that extra time to my craft, and — touch wood — I’m pretty much on track to have the book be the way I want it to be.</p><h1 id="4e59">Having a clear plan for social media</h1><p id="fa0e">I haven’t been as consistent as I’d like to be on Medium, but that’s because the book’s been taking up most of my creative bandwidth. Once that’s done, I plan to build a presence online — with a clear strategy in place.</p><p id="5d82">This time, I’ll include LinkedIn along with Medium. As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve always known I’ll come back to LinkedIn someday — it’s the ideal place to market yourself to employers and clients.</p><p id="906b">I don’t have that plan taped out yet, but I’ve been ideating. A lot. And interesting things should follow soon.</p><h1 id="9fd7">Investing in healthy habits</h1><p id="afe4">I probably sound like a broken record at this point, but fitness is so, so critical to your life — and having a nice body is only part of the perks.</p><p id="bcfc">Having gone through years of bad eating cycles, I know that food and exercise have a direct impact on my mental health. I’ve made some good progress already with both, and the goal is to be even better. Some recent changes:</p><ul><li>Having small breakfasts on days I feel sluggish in the morning (I normally only eat lunch and dinner)</li><li>Upping my protein consumption with chicken and eggs</li><li>Appreciating each treat and not feeling “guilty” about it</li><li>Wearing my fitness watch less often so that I’m not compulsively counting steps or calories</li><li>Giving myself permissio

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n to work out at night (which is allegedly not good) rather than skip</li></ul><p id="8e65">Next up — having a sustainable running schedule and baking in a weekly stretching/Pilates routine. And yep, part of the goal is maintaining the bod. No shame in that.</p><h1 id="a30b">Getting to the root of my toxic traits</h1><p id="b2d2">I’ve been thinking a lot about my flaws, and not in a self-loathing way.</p><p id="2e13">I believe that most toxic traits stem from a single fundamental source of disconnect with yourself. You’re denying a part of who you really are, and your mind rebels against that, which makes you act out. To truly stop the toxic behaviour, you need to locate that root and fix the problem.</p><p id="ec33">So far, I was trying to fix individual behaviours, and the results were meh and best. Now, though, I know where most of my behaviours were coming from — and now that I’m addressing that fundamental issue, I’m already a lot calmer and more moderated in my responses to situations.</p><p id="5626">(More on this later.)</p><h1 id="a20e">Working towards a life on my terms</h1><p id="2855">At 30, I’ve seen enough of life to know that I don’t want my goals to be all about money.</p><p id="3000">Money matters, obviously. But I want my life to be holistically rich, rather than rich only in terms of what I can buy.</p><p id="3390">To me, richness looks like</p><ul><li>Enough time to call my own</li><li>The freedom to choose what I spend my money on</li><li>A fulfilling and critically acclaimed fiction career</li><li>A continuing investment in fitness</li><li>Stable mental health</li><li>The freedom to learn new skills</li><li>Quality time with the people I love</li><li>Memorable holidays with my spouse, my parents, my friends and on my own</li><li>An abundance of quiet</li><li>An abundance of play</li></ul><p id="cd75">These are what I want to make money for.</p><h1 id="0bb3">Bottom line</h1><p id="c3fe">It’s amazing how good it can feel to stop and reset.</p><p id="3cd4">I’m the type of person who needs big goals to chase. But I’m also the type who needs adequate prep time for those big goals. This time, right now, I’m treating as prep for the big dreams and accomplishments to follow.</p><p id="8377">I feel good. I don’t want to jinx things by sharing too much about my plans, but I feel good. Confident. Ready. Readier than I’ve ever been.</p><p id="87e0">All those stories about reinvention, I’m living my own version right now.</p><p id="e394">And I can’t wait to chronicle what follows.</p></article></body>

I Just Turned 30 And I Don’t Have A Set Game Plan And It’s Not So Bad

You don’t always have to be in control

Photo by Alexey Demidov: https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-driving-motorcycle-10640628/

My 2022 self would find this title hilarious.

I was flailing last year. Going through a tough time professionally, worried that I was going to be a broke failure all my life, being a jerk to the people I love — and simultaneously scrolling through the feeds of successful writers in a desperate bid for tips to make six figures and become an Internet personality right now.

Obviously, that didn’t happen. And I’ve learned to be okay with that. More importantly — for the first time in 30 years, I’m okay with not immediately having any big career goals to work toward.

It’s not been easy getting here. It all happened pretty recently, and I haven’t had time to think about the hows and whys so much. At some point I’ll do that introspection — there are critical lessons to be picked up — but right now, I’m investing in habits and practices that will hold me in good stead long-term regardless of what turns my career takes. Hard changes, some of them, but I can feel the difference already — and it’s significant.

Choosing the right people to follow online

Let’s be honest, most of us can’t just delete social media. What we can do is curate what we consume so that we aren’t diving down black holes every time we log in.

My goal with social media is to find influencers who share lessons that I can actually learn from. For instance, I recently discovered an Instagram page called The Rules of 30. The lady behind it shares amazing content about how to live your best life as a 30-something. I resonate with so much of it, and I’m already adopting a lot of what she advises.

I love Sachin Jha’s posts on LinkedIn. He started freelancing while in college and is doing extremely well for himself — and he doesn’t hesitate to share exact processes rather than vague “be consistent” type posts. As a bonus, he adds food pics. I’m all about the food pics.

And here on Medium, I love Eve Arnold for her part-time creator content. I love how she’s proving that you can make a great living online without quitting your day job. As someone who’s making a living while focusing on her art, there’s a lot to be said about the part-time life— and she’s definitely at the forefront of that movement.

Completing my book

The biggest gift I’ve given myself is permission to complete my book by the end of the year.

Literary fiction can be the biggest slog. You need each story to be as perfectly perfect as it can be, and that requires a whooooole lot of concentration. Now that I’m taking a pause from full-time work, I’ve been able to devote that extra time to my craft, and — touch wood — I’m pretty much on track to have the book be the way I want it to be.

Having a clear plan for social media

I haven’t been as consistent as I’d like to be on Medium, but that’s because the book’s been taking up most of my creative bandwidth. Once that’s done, I plan to build a presence online — with a clear strategy in place.

This time, I’ll include LinkedIn along with Medium. As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve always known I’ll come back to LinkedIn someday — it’s the ideal place to market yourself to employers and clients.

I don’t have that plan taped out yet, but I’ve been ideating. A lot. And interesting things should follow soon.

Investing in healthy habits

I probably sound like a broken record at this point, but fitness is so, so critical to your life — and having a nice body is only part of the perks.

Having gone through years of bad eating cycles, I know that food and exercise have a direct impact on my mental health. I’ve made some good progress already with both, and the goal is to be even better. Some recent changes:

Having small breakfasts on days I feel sluggish in the morning (I normally only eat lunch and dinner)
Upping my protein consumption with chicken and eggs
Appreciating each treat and not feeling “guilty” about it
Wearing my fitness watch less often so that I’m not compulsively counting steps or calories
Giving myself permission to work out at night (which is allegedly not good) rather than skip

Next up — having a sustainable running schedule and baking in a weekly stretching/Pilates routine. And yep, part of the goal is maintaining the bod. No shame in that.

Getting to the root of my toxic traits

I’ve been thinking a lot about my flaws, and not in a self-loathing way.

I believe that most toxic traits stem from a single fundamental source of disconnect with yourself. You’re denying a part of who you really are, and your mind rebels against that, which makes you act out. To truly stop the toxic behaviour, you need to locate that root and fix the problem.

So far, I was trying to fix individual behaviours, and the results were meh and best. Now, though, I know where most of my behaviours were coming from — and now that I’m addressing that fundamental issue, I’m already a lot calmer and more moderated in my responses to situations.

(More on this later.)

Working towards a life on my terms

At 30, I’ve seen enough of life to know that I don’t want my goals to be all about money.

Money matters, obviously. But I want my life to be holistically rich, rather than rich only in terms of what I can buy.

To me, richness looks like

Enough time to call my own
The freedom to choose what I spend my money on
A fulfilling and critically acclaimed fiction career
A continuing investment in fitness
Stable mental health
The freedom to learn new skills
Quality time with the people I love
Memorable holidays with my spouse, my parents, my friends and on my own
An abundance of quiet
An abundance of play

These are what I want to make money for.

Bottom line

It’s amazing how good it can feel to stop and reset.

I’m the type of person who needs big goals to chase. But I’m also the type who needs adequate prep time for those big goals. This time, right now, I’m treating as prep for the big dreams and accomplishments to follow.

I feel good. I don’t want to jinx things by sharing too much about my plans, but I feel good. Confident. Ready. Readier than I’ve ever been.

All those stories about reinvention, I’m living my own version right now.

And I can’t wait to chronicle what follows.