I gave up the idea of perfection and life’s easy now.

Chase happiness, greatness and peace.

I have been a perfectionist since the day I can remember. No, the journey has not been smooth till now at least on a personal scale.

Moreover, I could see certain behavioral changes in me, I started attaching my worth to my performance and achievements, setting way too high values and standards for myself and, people-pleasing a lot. I noticed this symptom gradually and understood the idea of perfection, anger issues, and living a flawless life was nothing but a way of faking reality and I was living in delusion.

How do I deal with it now?

I started talking about this to my girlfriend and just sharing solved half the problem. Even, she noticed this subtle changes way before I did. I decided to change this and live a fulfilling life rather than a perfect life.

Progress >> Perfection

That’s what I do now. Progress is always better than perfection. Progress is progress no matter how small. Doing things is far better than hoping for the perfect. I started doing things slowly and steadily, no things were not good, and I messed up,

I thought of waking up at 4 but woke at 6, thought of studying for 10 hours but did for 7, and decided to write 5 posts per week but ended up writing 3. Things were going as per expected but I was improving even by an inch but I was improving. And for me, that matters.

Many might think it’s laziness but I was improving on a daily basis. So, it’s a win win situation for me.

Being kind on myself.

As I said I started keeping high values and expectations for myself it cost me my peace and I was way hard on myself. I became rigid and didn’t show any emotions and due to this, my relationships suffered. I started being kind to myself. I thanked myself. Like, I planned for 10 hour study but did only 8. Instead of banging my head about why I got 8 hours, I thanked myself for being focused for such long hours and then analyzed where my hours went. Not, that I wanted to become perfect but to improve.

Replacing perfection with compassion.

Chasing perfection isn’t always to bring the best out of you sometimes the pursuit can be troublesome. So, apart from being just kind to me, I started practicing self-compassion. I am doing more positive self-talk, and practicing mindfulness, instead of saying imperfection is bad I am saying it’s okay to be imperfect sometimes flaws are worth having. It’s all about the perspective the water is either half empty or half full.

My worth doesn’t depend on my success.

Achievement and medals were the key driving force behind me turning a maniac into the process of perfection. Attributing everything to it and thinking life is void without it was the worst thought process I had and I regret it.

My worth is what I make. My worth is how I feel about myself and others. It’s inherent and doesn’t proportionate to my success. The idea that people like me for my professional goals and I was impressing everyone. Honestly what I was doing was self-sabotage and it was not worth doing it.

I realized I can’t be a people pleaser. So, I changed. The people who like me will like me for no reason and will choose me every day over and over again.

End Note,

I would say, I gave up on the idea of perfection. I don’t cultivate that mindset anymore. It’s in the past. I have learned significant lessons from it and I am happy about it.

I don’t chase perfection anymore, I chase, greatness, happiness, discipline, and peace.

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