I Gained 20,000 Followers on Medium in Less Than 19 Months

If an awkward, aspie, fat girl with no friends can be Medium famous, maybe you can do it too (if that’s something you want)

So, I’m kind of a weirdo.

I was never good at “winning friends” or “influencing people.” Back when I worked at Ecolab, Inc., you’d never find me at a Toastmasters meeting.

Any time I ever tried to organize a party, get together, or charity drive, it was usually a bust. Or, at the very least, met with many eye rolls.

It’s never been too unusual for me to cycle through periods of having just a few friends at school or work, to having nobody.

There are legit reasons why I’m not what you would call a people person, (though to be fair, I’ve had my occasional phases as a social butterfly):

• I’m an introvert (INFP)
• I’m on the autism spectrum (and awkward)
• I have borderline personality disorder in addition to depression and anxiety
• I’m a single mom
• I come from a dysfunctional family
• I dropped out of college because I was nearly flunking out
• At 37 years old, I’ve only had a driver’s license for 3 weeks
• I’ve been deeply wounded by those I trusted the most
• I’m currently morbidly obese and suffer from PCOS and lipedema (aka painful fat syndrome), though I’ve lost over 100 pounds twice in my life
• I tend to move in slow motion, not just because I think slowly, but also because I’m so damn clumsy

A hallmark of my life with BPD has been my habit of having these very grandiose visions which wind up with me flat on my face. I’ve had so much desire to transform my life, but all too often lack the knowledge or skill to see my plans through to fruition.

I’m Pretty Sure That Medium and Motherhood Are the Only Things I’ve Ever Really Been Good at in My Adult Life

Given my history with failure at every turn, this is pretty amazing. I never actually expected to do well on Medium, but I was desperate to make it work.

Some folks here remember me from back when I first began writing on Medium at the end of April in 2018. Back then, I was almost exclusively slice-of-life and confessional. I wrote a lot about my dream to support myself and my daughter with my own writing. The kind where I picked all of the topics.

For those who have followed me from that rocky start, I think there’s often something very fascinating about my trajectory here. Hell, I’m fascinated by my journey on the platform, along with several of those whom I’ve watched over many months too.

Last Night, I Very Unceremoniously Reached 20,000 Followers on Medium

It’s felt like a long time coming, except that it’s really not. I reached 20K followers in less than 19 months.

ICYMI, my numbers are not “the top.” I’m by no means the fastest climbing or highest-paid writer on Medium. Nor am I the most popular.

Truth be told, I’ve got a knack for pissing a lot of people off. Or, I suppose, irritating the hell out of them just for the fact that I’m still here.

None of those negative reactions are truly much of a surprise. Remember, I kinda suck when it comes to people, and over the years, I’ve turned into something of a loner.

By far, Shaunta Grimes is the Medium friend I speak with the most, and I know my reactions (or lack of reaction) tend to drive her a little bit bonkers. It also isn't lost on me that she reaches out to me at least 95% of the time.

And pretty much any time I write about other writers on Medium, I think about my friend, Judy McLain. It’s been way too long since I’ve last messaged her, and I can’t explain why beyond the fact that I’m terrible at keeping the communication going.

Even So, My Story Is Pretty Remarkable

I think it’s remarkable that someone as horribly awkward and terrible with long-term relationships can reach 20K followers on any platform.

In a lot of ways, it kind of shakes up a lot of the disparity that I’ve felt in this world. I’m not cool or conventionally attractive. As illustrated in much of my writing, I’ve got a lot of issues.

The fact that my writing resonates with many people says more to me about our hope for humanity than my own talent. When people read my words about obesity, mental illness, toxic family, or whatever, it gives me hope for the future.

Maybe people aren’t so terrible, huh? Maybe we’re trying to be more empathetic and connected after all.

I Doubt My Results on Medium Are Something Others Can Duplicate

But that doesn’t mean that they can’t do better or nearly as well. And let’s face it, none of us should be refusing to try just because somebody else might have done (or perhaps will do) better.

To a certain extent, I got lucky on Medium. In hindsight, it appears that I joined the Partner Program at a really good time. And I was certainly lucky to have had one of my first stories featured on the front page.

It’s true that I’ve made it to the front page at least seven times since beginning this journey, and that’s not exactly the sort of thing most Medium writers can plan for or count on.

Of course, with the recent change to the MPP earnings system, it seems like anything is possible and none of us really knows how the next 19 months are gonna shake out.

I hear that newcomer Ashley Shannon (hello, irony) has already surpassed $1K for earnings in her first month. Here’s hoping she enjoys another exciting journey in her next year and a half, but it’s already off to an amazing start.

But Isn’t Writing on Medium About More Than the Money?

Do you know what? For me, it is and it isn’t. I’m not ashamed to write for money because this is how I support my daughter as a single mom. Likewise, I’m not ashamed to talk frankly about money and my earnings.

Those who do have a problem with it are in my opinion completely missing the point of why I’m here. My mission to make a good living by writing my heart out and maintaining a flexible schedule for my daughter is relatable for so many people.

And for single mothers everywhere, the reality of my situation isn’t about “money-, success-, or struggle-porn.” People don’t like me more because I’m making decent money. A lot of folks don’t even grasp what my income is really like since my paychecks are 100% pretax dollars and my work comes with zero traditional employment benefits like sick days, vacation time, or healthcare.

That said, money is, and will always be a huge part of my writing. Without the money, my freedom is significantly hampered. This is the reality of life as a single mother who was raised in poverty and who spent the first few years of her daughter’s life in poverty too.

There’s this tendency to make money some sort of evil in the writing world, but I just don’t buy it because such a notion is particularly damaging to the women who could go onto live better lives by writing for their livelihood.

Frankly, I Have a Great Love for Single Women Writers

I think there’s something incredibly badass about women artists in general who support themselves and their offspring without the support of a partner.

Am I biased? Well, obviously. And yet, I’ve seen firsthand just how much daily writing benefits us and fuels our independence.

When I first began this writing career, I still felt as if my life was incomplete without marriage or a partner. Now, the more that I write, the more I realize that singleness isn’t settling, and partnership isn’t the goal.

I like my life as a single mom. I love my freedom and this journey, and I no longer feel like a desperate or tragic character in my story.

In fact, I feel fortunate to be in very good company with a long line of female writers who have used writing as a means to support their families and bring great joy to their own private worlds.

And I can’t help but wonder if other followers and readers feel inspired or simply interested in my growing love for independence.

Of Course, Followers on Medium Are Not Everything

You might have heard that followers on Medium are nothing but a vanity metric. That’s not entirely true.

The grim reality is that even with 20K followers, you might be lucky to have 10K views a day. Each writer will experience a varying level of engagement from their followers, but truth be told, Medium doesn’t do a great job of letting your followers know that you’ve posted. For most of us, it’s really just a teeny, tiny fraction of followers seeing our posts unless something happens to go viral.

What that means is that you will most likely not “have it made” if you reach 20K followers. Like me, you’ll still be at the mercy of mysterious algorithms and some stories may still flop.

My Single Best Piece of Advice for Success on Medium Is Simple

If you want to take anything that I’ve done to heart and repeat after me, I suggest that you keep showing up to write.

I’ve watched a lot of people here get a viral story and then fizzle out when the next ones don’t do nearly as well. Like anything else in life, you can’t win them all, but you’ll certainly win more often if you keep on playing.

OK? You can’t give up if you want to succeed here.

Yes, you might write some stories that suck. You might write stuff you love that other folks criticize. And you might even find yourself under great scrutiny. Oh well.

This is stuff that happens to artists of all kinds and you’ve just got to roll with it.

Trust me. I am a fat and awkward aspie, a single mama with a pretty pitiful social life, and mental health issues. I’m not some poster child for success or awesomeness. I’m not the person you’d expect to succeed in a personal writing career.

And yet? I’m making it work one day at a time. If anything, I sincerely hope that motivates you and gives you an inkling of the truth that you’ll never know what could happen if you don’t try.

Just try.

Stranger success stories happen every day.