I Feel Guilty for My Inadequate Parenting
And I don’t really have a solution for it
I think deep down I know I’m doing a good job as a new mom. And especially when I look at the bigger picture of all the things I juggle in life.
Yet I can’t shake this nagging feeling of guilt that I’m not doing enough.
If my daughter had it her way, I would be her playmate at all hours of the day.
If my partner had it his way, I would be this superstar preschool teacher and our almost 3-year-old daughter would already be reading and writing.
If society had it their way, I would be this amazing children’s healthy chef and only allow my daughter to watch a minimal amount of cartoons on TV.
My reality:
- I can’t play for more than 10 minutes straight without trying to find a distraction because it’s just not for me
- I’m not motivated to sit and do teaching time with my little girl because let’s face it, does she really need that yet?
- I pull together quick meals for my daughter and do the best I can to convince her to eat vegetables, but sometimes I just give up
- I do let her watch cartoons, definitely a lot more than I should, but I just need a freaking break — every day as it so happens…
So, I’m left with this feeling that I’m not doing enough. That I’m an inadequate parent.
Unfortunately, I don’t really have a solution to this predicament. Most days I just spend time convincing myself it’s okay and everything will be okay. It usually works and sometimes it doesn’t.
Does anyone relate? I sure hope so.
In the spirit of convincing myself everything is okay, here are some things I think I am doing well:
- I try to create as loving of an environment for her as possible
- I give her lots of hugs and praise
- I do my best to help her understand her emotions
- I support her to be independent
- I take care of what she needs as best I can
- I try to create exciting and joyful moments with her (we call them surprises)
- I give her a healthy dose of freedom to explore
When I look back at that list, I suppose I’m not doing so bad at all.
With love, Megan