I Don’t Keep a Gratitude Journal
But I live in gratitude every day
I don’t keep a gratitude journal. I prefer to experience the joy of gratitude in the moment with as many moments as I can manage. I string these moments together so they make up my whole day. I don’t want to wait until the end of the day to recall nice things that happened to me. I get to enjoy that feeling of well-being all day long.
This how I learned to do it. Give it a try.
Be aware and pay focused attention.
Pick up an apple out of the fruit bowl. Observe it. Look at it without judgement. Turn it over in your hands. Feel the smooth, cool skin. It’s an apple not an orange. Don’t be concerned that it is not an orange. The apple doesn’t have to be anything but what it is. In a nod toward my hippy days, it is what it is.
Look at the bright green color and the dent on top where the stem is, or used to be. Keep holding and looking at the apple until a feeling of appreciation for this marvelous fruit wells up from deep inside.
I try do this with everything. I try to stay in the moment and pay attention.
My car is running with a soft hum and is taking me where I want to go. That sunset is so stunning it takes my breath away. My clothes are soft and flowing and give me such a sense of freedom.
Moment by moment I am filled with appreciation for everything in my life.
Let life flow through you
Feeling gratitude is a powerful way to stay in the moment every day. The more gratitude you feel ,the more everything becomes gratitude-worthy. You stop judging events as good or bad. They are just events and part of your life. Life flows through you.
This story called, A Chinese Parable will illustrate what I mean about not judging events.
A farmer and his son had a beloved stallion who helped the family earn a living. One day, the horse ran away and their neighbors exclaimed, “Your horse ran away, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”
A few days later, the horse returned home, leading a few wild mares back to the farm as well. The neighbors shouted out, “Your horse has returned, and brought several horses home with him. What great luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”
Later that week, the farmer’s son was trying to break one of the mares and she threw him to the ground, breaking his leg. The villagers cried, “Your son broke his leg, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”
A few weeks later, soldiers from the national army marched through town, recruiting all the able-bodied boys for the army. They did not take the farmer’s son, still recovering from his injury. Friends shouted, “Your boy is spared, what tremendous luck!” To which the farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.”
We don’t always know exactly how events in our life will play out.
Sometimes being in the moment hurts
When being in the moment doesn’t feel so good you can change it.
I share a painting studio with other artists. One of the artists called me on the phone to tell me that I had not set the alarm correctly the last time I was in the studio. My response was that I had done it the same way I always had for the past year.
Her comment was that the alarm had been worked on and we did it a different way now. That was news to me. I don’t remember anybody telling me about the change. Her next comment was that nobody else was having a problem with it so it must be me. Then she hung up.
Well, hell. I was confused, hurt, then pissed off. I don’t know what was going on with her but it doesn’t matter. I had the choice to stew over it or move on.
I simply sat with the anger and allowed myself to feel it. In less than a minute, the frustration and anger lifted and I was back to my peaceful self. I went on with my work. I was grateful for that peace.
I might talk to her about it later and I might not. It doesn’t matter at this point.
The Science of Gratitude
Just about every self-help book I have ever read mentions the virtues of gratitude. I strongly believe in the power of being grateful for all you have and for some things you don’t have.
As it turns out, there is science to back this up. Gratitude literally rewires your brain to be happier. Wow, how cool is that! And it is something you can do yourself without having to get anybody’s permission. And usually nobody is even aware you are doing it.
Gratitude is an emotion expressing appreciation for what one has. It is a recognition of value independent of monetary worth. Spontaneously generated from within, it is an affirmation of goodness. -Psychology Today
There are also wonderful physical outcomes of being grateful. People who practice gratitude have a more optimistic outlook on life. They are more active, are more social, have fewer doctor visits and get better sleep.
Here are some more ways to learn to cultivate gratitude
If you are new to this gratitude thing, it might be helpful to start writing down all the things you are grateful for. Think back over your day or yesterday if you are a morning writer. Think about things happened to you or the things you have that give you joy. Try to go deeper than just my friends, my family, and my health. Be specific. The more you practice, the easier it becomes.
Tell the people in your life what you appreciate about them. I like to see the look of surprise and joy on the face of the recipient. Of course, this is important to do for family and friends. It builds a bond between you. It does great things for them and helps you realize what wonderful people you have in your life and how much they contribute.
Try to extend this appreciation to people outside your close circle. There is a cashier at my local grocery store that makes my day. I always get in her checkout lane when I can. She greets me with a wide smile and a booming voice, “Hey Baby, did you find everything you were looking for? Okay, then. I’m gonna get you checked out. You have a wonderful day.” I don’t know what her life is like or what her circumstances are at home. She’s an older woman working part time in a grocery store. But at her job she generates pure joy. And I told her so, too. Then I watched her face light up.
When you look in the mirror, think about something you like about yourself or something you have accomplished.
Look at that adorable face looking back at me. You killed it today in the business meeting. Yes, you did. How did you get to be so smart? I just want to kiss you right on the face.
Everything can be made better by learning to practice gratitude. Better health, better sense of optimism, and just a happier life in general.