I Can’t Shut It Off

What they don’t tell you about entrepreneurship

They’ll tell you all the good things about entrepreneurship. They’ll tell you about the freedom to make your own choices. They’ll dangle shiny objects in front of your face, like fancy cars and oversized mansions.

They love to brag about the benefits of becoming an entrepreneur, but they won’t tell you about the negatives.

You’ve probably seen at least one infomercial with some guy standing in front of a nice car and a huge house. He’ll give you a glimpse of what it looks like to be successful. Maybe he’ll give you a tour of the mansion, and as he does, he’ll talk about this '‘new and innovative marketing system’ before slamming you with a $299.99 price tag.

They’ll get you addicted to the concept of success, making you believe that you need large quantities of cash and fancy things to be successful.

How It All Started

One day, my wife and I were approached by an older couple, offering to have coffee and talk. I almost said no, but, well, to be honest, they seemed rich, so we said yes.

As it turns out, they weren’t rich. Neither was their “mentor,” but their mentor had a mentor who was (and I quote) ‘filthy rich’ — oh, boy.

They were members of a multi-level marketing system that sold wholesale products through word of mouth. We were offered a low-cost entry into the business and were told that we should buy products each month to better represent our business.

We attended our first local meeting, and eventually, our first out-of-state event. We met famous professional speakers. They flashed images of fancy cars and huge houses on the big screen. They spoke about Hawaii, freedom, and financial independence.

They Got Me

I was only sixteen at the time, and my wife — god bless her heart — knew right off the bat that something was aloof, yet she encouraged me anyway.

We attended events, bought all the books, bought all the products. We tried prospecting, cold-calling, recruiting family, friends— everything.

It took two years and $16,000 later to understand that things weren’t working.

We eventually left the business, but I was never able to escape the feeling. Success, freedom, financial independence, big cars, and oversized mansions. I wanted all of it, so much that I could feel it in my core.

My Passions Turned Into Possible Sources Of Income

I used to love to draw, but then I started looking into ways to make money from my drawings. Eventually, I realized that my work wasn’t worth squat, so I stopped drawing. It wasn’t going to get me the big house or the flashy cars, so instead of continuing to practice and become a better artist, I just…gave up — even though I was passionate about drawing in the beginning.

I wasn’t going to waste my time drawing (even though I loved to draw) because I knew what was out there. I knew of the possibilities; the luxurious lifestyles, the jewelry, and the expensive champagne at midnight with friends and family who sit and celebrate your successes.

The same thing happened to just about everything that I was passionate about in life. The only thing that mattered was finding the one thing that would make me incredibly wealthy. Hell, I spent $16,000 under the pursuit of life-long financial independence. Something had to work.

Entrepreneurship Can Become An Addiction

It can, and it will — it did for me. I can’t go a day without thinking about some way to get rich. What’s the next step I have to take to accomplish my dream life? Every morning I ask myself that question, and then I spend the rest of the day pursuing the answer.

I can’t relax, I can’t sleep — I can’t shut it off.

Hell, it’s 2 in the morning as I write this post. The idea came to me, and, well, I just had to get it out; otherwise, it wouldn’t let me sleep.

My wife gets angry with me at times because it’s nearly impossible for me to relax. I feel like restlessness is a common trait among many entrepreneurs. You know that you’re destined to make a change. You’ve seen a glimpse into the impossible. You know what’s possible, and for that reason, it’s almost impossible to relax.

I have to force myself to meditate, and the only time I take a break is when I’m reading a good book — otherwise, it’s nearly impossible for me to shut it off. I could be an hour deep into a film, yet I’ll still be thinking about ways to make money, escape the 9–5, and live my dream life. Yeah, it’s that bad.

I Believe That Most Entrepreneurs Are Slightly Depressed

It only makes sense. You know what’s possible. You know that you have a purpose in life — but what? I believe that most entrepreneurs are slightly depressed until they find their purpose.

The goal of any entrepreneur is to make an impact in the lives of others. Until that happens, it’s easy to feel sad — depressed even — because you haven’t reached your goal yet. However, I believe that entrepreneurs face different kinds of depression.

Normally, when one’s depressed, it’s because they feel like life’s out of their control. It’s very similar to how an entrepreneur feels, yet, someone pursuing entrepreneurship feels this on a whole other level because they’re actively pursuing an escape. They know exactly why they feel the way that they do, and a determined entrepreneur will do everything in his power to escape that feeling by setting goals and putting in work.

On more than one occasion, I’ve felt that feeling — like I could be doing more. At times like this, I have to remind myself that the path of entrepreneurship is a slow process — a journey that not many can handle. Success comes to those who practice persistence and maintain a dedication to their craft.

Medium Saved Me By Teaching Me To Slow Down

I first started writing on Medium because of the money, and — like all things — I started in a full sprint, publishing 2–3 articles per day. It was only a matter of time before I ran out of ideas and, inevitably, slowed down with my writing. During that time, I noticed something; my stats improved!

I didn’t start to see real success on Medium until I learned to slow down, spend more time on each article, and — ironically — publish less frequently.

I went from publishing 2–3 articles per day to no more than once a day. The results? I had more views, gained more followers, and made more money over the last thirty days than my whole six months combined writing on Medium!

Medium taught me to slow down and spend more time with the task at hand. I started to apply these methods to other areas of my life, and, similarly, things began to improve. I’m finding that I can do less yet achieve more.

Are you an entrepreneur? What do you do to relax? Are you ever able to shut it off? Let me know in the comments!