I Can’t See the Yard for the Weeds

When some people can’t see the forest for the trees.

When someone “can’t see the forest for the trees” they struggle with seeing the big picture of an issue because they get too caught up in the details.

Forests are made up of trees, just like projects, events, or even life consists of details. If someone is too infatuated with the details (trees) they can miss understanding the big picture.

You may be familiar with the Buddhist parable of The Blind Men and the Elephant, made famous by Rumi. Blind men were brought to an elephant and positioned all around it.

When they were asked, “What is an elephant like?” Not being able to see or feel the whole elephant and not knowing what one was, they just communicated the one aspect they felt.

The one who touched the leg said, “a pillar,” and one who touched the end of the tail said, “a broom.” After everyone answered, they began arguing with one another. Their arguments were supported by the “perspective” each one had observed.

Rumi used the parable to communicate how our prejudices can blind us despite authentic information and a plethora of other lessons.

Using the forest for the trees statement, we all look at projects, events, and life from our perspectives. Yes, we can get caught up in the details and fail to see the big picture.

Let’s say a basketball team is playing man-to-man defense and the opposing team’s point guard has the ball. He gets past his defender and drives to the basket.

The defensive person guarding the center on the baseline doesn’t leave his man to try to stop the point guard from scoring. While he might think he is playing incredible defense against the other team’s center and may even say, “Well, at least my man didn’t score!”

He is not seeing the big picture. The big picture is keeping the other team from scoring, not just the person you are defending!

Enough about the forest for the trees. Let’s talk about the yard for the weeds. Unfortunately, I have more of a negative approach toward life. I don’t want it to be this way, and I’m working on it.

In the Spring each year before my grass is cut for the first time, it is hard to see my yard for the weeds. You can see a little grass, but the weeds are more dominant than anything else.

I tend to view life this way. I usually see weeds, or negative aspects, more than the big picture (the yard). I want to be a “glass half full” kind of guy, but currently, I’m still a “glass half empty” person.

There have been brief periods in my life where, like Cheryl Crow, I could say, “All I wanna do is have some fun.” But life sobers me up fairly quickly.

So even in a philosophical sense, I can’t see the yard for the weeds. If I am working on a particular detail of a project, I may not only get caught up in that detail, I will allow it to consume me until it is done.

I will not be able to focus on anything else until said detail is accomplished, then I will move on to the next detail. I am not able to focus on the beauty of the big picture or even appreciate the overall work that is getting done due to me viewing the “weeds” I’m currently trudging through.

When all the details are finished. I can enjoy and appreciate the finished product. Yet, it won’t be long before the next project will need my attention.

What the H-E-double-hockey-sticks is wrong with me?

If we are going on vacation, I do not allow myself to relax, even a little, until:

-We’ve packed for the trip… -We’ve gotten to the airport… -We’ve got our boarding passes… -We’ve gotten through security… -We’ve boarded the plane… -We’ve taken off, and landed… -We’ve gotten our luggage… -We’re in transport to our destination… -We’re checked in to our arriving destination... -We’ve settled into our room. (Done. Relax.)

I realize that a tiring day at the airport or flying is better than a good day at work! I get it. It is just hard to tell my brain that sometimes.

On the outside, I try to put on and keep a brave, positive, fun-loving face, but on the inside, there is a war going on.

My family and close friends will tell you I am an over-thinker. I over-process most everything. I’ve even over-processed why I over-process things.

I need to work on my outlook on life. I know Annie would tell me, “The sun will come out tomorrow!” Bobby McFerrin would tell me, “Don’t worry, be happy!” And Pharrell Williams would just tell me to clap along because he’s happy!

Is it that easy to just change our outlook? Yes, but not overnight. We have the power to decide how we view life and how we act or react when life happens.

I can say my outlook is much better when I have my daily meditation time. I’ve mentioned this before, but my meditation comprises reading the Holy Bible and spending time with God in prayer.

However you choose to meditate, there is scientific evidence that backs up the benefits. The more days I miss my meditation, the less positive my outlook is on life. The opposite is true as well. Just like it is easier to acknowledge my yard is a yard when I keep my grass (and weeds) cut.

Dr. Andrea Brandt shares 6 Steps to Transform Your Outlook. She gives some great advice, but I want to share the two steps that I most identified with.

She suggests we practice thought-stopping.

The second we become aware we are thinking negatively and not necessarily factual, we need to stop that processing. The second I know I am over-processing anything, especially to the point of being negative, I am going to choose to stop and redirect myself.

The other step that I want to gravitate toward is what she calls end your “Yes, but…” attitude.

Admittedly, I have one of the biggest “Yes, buts…” of anyone! This is striving to avoid the “glass half empty” mentality. Look for the positives in things instead of only seeing the negatives.

These are just three practical ways I can get better at having a more positive outlook on life. Having a consistent meditation time, practicing thought-stopping when my thoughts get negative, and end my “Yes, but…” attitude.

We have the power to choose our outlook on life. If you struggle as I do, I hope you will join me in this growth process.

The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice.— George Eliot