I Called His Wife

Unspoken Rules of Adultery

I didn’t call his wife. I would never do that.

But this woman on r/adultery did.

Angelicdevil posted, “I did the thing you should never do…I called his wife.”

Stomach drop.

You what?

“I was with my affair partner for over 2 years. It was tumultuous. It culminated with him getting caught. It ended with me slamming a door in his face and talking to his wife,” she wrote.

Woah?

“I sent her proof of our relationship. We talked for almost an hour. It was civil, and she even said I sounded like someone I could be friends with (weird, I know).” Ya think, lady? Weird doesn’t even begin to explain your psyche.

“His wife asked specific questions about dates, hotels we stayed at,” she continued. Why torture her with that information? What good is that? Just let it go.

“He never said he wanted to leave me,” the scorned wife claimed.

What do you think he said to his mistress?

“We’ll be together someday.”

In la la land. Any sentence that ends with someday…

Somedays only happen in the movies. The ones without the gritty realism that is popular now. Movies that don’t get many accolades because they are too saccharine.

“The worst thing was all the lies. And, yes, I know I shouldn’t have expected this man to be honest with me,” Angelic wrote.

Duh!

“I want us to be completely open with each other,” he said. “But the lies about our relationship…the future. I knew it was all a fantasy for him, deep in my heart,” Angelic continued. “I ended my marriage, hoping we’d be together.”

“I blew up at him in the hotel room in January when he asked me to hide in the bathroom because his wife wanted to FaceTime him.”

What a moron. This guy. Hide in the bathroom? He almost deserved it.

“I just couldn’t participate in his fantasy any longer,” she posted.

“There’s been no contact since that night. He’s tried to email/text me and tell me he’s in therapy. He misses me. I deleted and blocked. I have kept my distance,” she ended with.

Where to start unpacking the crazy?

She’s every married guy’s worst nightmare.

The comments weren’t pretty.

“I think you’re just bitter that your marriage broke up and wanted to destroy his, too. You don’t contact his spouse. Even if she calls you first. He’s a dick, but so are you,” wrote Dreamerz2 on Angelic’s post.

Oh, yeah.

Adulterers have loose moral codes, let’s just say, but ethical principles, nonetheless.

“Well, I think you did a shitty thing you had no right to do. You entered into a relationship with someone you knew was married, and you agreed to keep it a secret,” wrote another Redditor.

“That was a bunny boiler move. Guys, take notes. This is why you don’t reveal anything,” wrote another.

“How do you expect someone in an affair to be honest? He’s a liar by default. And once people start lying, it gets easier and easier to keep on lying,” wrote Karmicwhore.

That one struck close to home. Shit.

The truth is always just on the horizon.

“I mean it.” “I would never.” “I’ve never felt this way.” “We’re perfect together.”

Have I said any of those? I don’t even remember, anymore. I lie and lie.

Lying is worse than cheating. Angelicdevil thought so. She decided to tell the truth to the wife. Free her conscience. Assuage her guilt, maybe. Whatever it was, she felt better afterwards. Consequences, be damned!

How could she? you think. It’s so low. But not as low as, “Deny! Deny! And if that doesn’t work, deny some more.” The standard mantra of adulterers when caught.

“I think there’s an unspoken rule. Never get the spouses involved. It’s really selfish. It only causes more drama,” wrote Charmedbyanother.

Don’t cheat unless you know the rules.

This is a wake-up call for adulterers. Read The Adultery Academy series Teresa J Conway and I wrote for the Scarlett Letter.

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