avatarNicole Kay

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Humans Deserve the Same Rights as Animals

Why doctor-assisted death is the most humane way we can say goodbye to our suffering loved ones

Photo by Aron Visuals on Unsplash

Imagine this.

You’re skin and bones. You’re as light as a feather, but every limb in your body feels like it’s 500 pounds when you try to move.

Your whole body is akin to pain.

All you can do is lie in your misery.

Medication keeps you alive.

But you’re not living. You’re slowly fading away, little by little.

All you want is to be free from pain.

But whether or not you’re allowed to be free comes down to whether you’re an animal or a human.

If you’re a dog or cat, your human will do the humane thing and take you to the vet to be put to sleep. You’ll finally be at peace.

But if you’re a human, unless you live in one of the few jurisdictions that allows physician-assisted death, you’re out of luck. Society views releasing you from such pain as inhumane. You must lie in bed until nature takes its course.

You’re not hungry, but your caregivers force you to eat. You push the food away, praying starvation will speed up the process.

You’re spoon-fed liquids, and it burns to swallow.

You see the pain on your children’s faces. You watch as they give up everything to care for you.

They’ve lost their jobs. They’re missing their children’s activities.

Your ailment is destroying their lives.

But there’s nothing you can do.

You are helpless.

This is the riveting truth of an aging and sick America. I write from the perspective of a daughter and granddaughter who has watched her loved ones wash away before her eyes.

I remember the fear I experienced as a 9-year-old whose grandfather was dying from esophageal cancer. I feared he would die with me in the room because he could die at any time, and it was out of my control.

I watched as my aunt cared for my grandmother with dementia, and my parents cared for my other grandmother with neuropathy. She couldn’t feel her legs or walk, and after her stroke, she could barely talk. For almost a year, she was confined to her bed in a diaper and could only consume liquids.

Where do we draw the line?

A month before my dad died, my mom woke up and looked her 19-year-old cat in the eyes and knew it was his time. She took him to the vet to be put to sleep.

She’s done this several times over the years with my pets, and in my heart, I know I will have to do this with my sweet kitties one day.

Yet, we allow humans to suffer.

Why are we so cruel to humans?

Death is not an easy subject to bridge. No one likes to talk about it. No one wants to see their beloved parents or grandparents die.

Death is inevitable, though, especially with chronic, painful diseases.

Instead of accepting the inevitable, we sit back and let the ones we love suffer because we’re not ready to let go.

I remember hearing both my grandmothers begging the good Lord to take their souls for years.

My husband looked over my shoulder while writing this post and asked me, “Is this what you would want?”

I responded, “I would not want our child to give up his livelihood to care for me. What would you want?”

His response was, “I would hope you’d get better. There’s always hope.”

And that’s what’s wrong with society. Sometimes, we hold onto hope when we shouldn’t. It’s not me being a pessimist. I’m just a realist who has witnessed family members deteriorate. My husband hasn’t had this experience.

There comes a point when you know deep down they aren’t going to get better, even if you aren’t ready to admit it. There’s a look in their eyes, and like my mom and her cat, you’ll know.

Who should get a choice?

Anyone who is in excruciating, unbearable, and unfixable pain should get to choose whether they live or die. If their illness is terminal and there is no hope for improvement, they should have a choice to end their suffering.

If they are mentally incapacitated, their legal representative or power of attorney should be allowed to speak for them.

What about mental health disorders? The short answer is no. Mental health disorders should not qualify an individual for assisted suicide. Unless there is a physical ailment accompanying the disorder, this would make the person ineligible.

Your worst days may feel like the pain is unbearable and will never get better, but it does. Your best days will remind you of that.

This needs to be addressed because I don’t want anyone to think I’m suggesting that anyone and everyone who’s in any pain should have the right to end their life.

I was first introduced to the subject of assisted dying or “suicide” when I read Me Before You, a romantic novel by Jojo Moyes. (You can also listen to this book for free with an Audible trial.)

This controversial masterpiece was turned into a movie in 2016.

The topic was a punch in the gut, and I didn’t know how I initially felt about it.

The more I reflected, the more I realized it made sense that it was the only humane way to respond to a life in such pain.

Assisted suicide came up again last spring when I watched the A Million Little Things series finale. The show takes place in Boston, where assisted dying is not legal. A terminally ill character and the love of their life must make a difficult decision about whether or not they should “break the law.”

They shouldn’t have needed to break the law.

A better way to look at it is referred to as Death with Dignity .

Currently, only 11 jurisdictions in the United States allow death with dignity (source):

  • Oregon
  • Washington
  • Montana
  • Vermont
  • California
  • Colorado
  • Washington D.C.
  • Hawaii
  • New Jersey
  • Maine
  • New Mexico

You must be a resident of one of these states to die with dignity, meaning you cannot travel to one of these states from another state to obtain the medication, and patients must meet “a string of requirements.”

The following countries have some form of death with dignity laws in place (source):

  • New Zealand
  • Australia
  • Canada
  • Belgium
  • Luxembourg

Religion and Death with Dignity

Those who are against ending someone’s suffering often use religion to back up their arguments. Most religious leaders frown upon humans acting as God. Some even believe that if you’re suffering, you’re being punished for your evil deeds.

Some of the kindest people I’ve met, who’ve done nothing but help people their entire lives, have succumbed to terrible terminal illnesses. You’re telling me they deserve to suffer?

Some religions have come to accept that if you’re no longer able to worship and share the word of God with the world, then you have the right to end your suffering. This is a better way to look at death with dignity.

Final Thoughts

It hurts to think about the end of life, especially for the ones we love most in this world. As someone who has seen people I love die a slow, painful death, I wouldn’t wish that life upon my worst enemy. I would not want my son to put his life on hold because I can’t care for myself.

Humans deserve the right to choose to release their pain.

We deserve the same rights as animals.

My name is Nicole Kinkade, and I’m a freelance writer, mother, and cat lover. I write about writing and freelance tips, healthy living, books, and some other things too.

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