Tell the Voices in Your Head to STFU

Take control of the thoughts that cause you to fail or keep you from doing your best.

Sometimes we listen too much to those voices in our heads. After doing that for years or decades, and it becomes a way of seeing the world. This is where low self-esteem comes from, as well as impostor syndrome. It is the birthplace of negative emotions. It could contribute to mental and physical illness as well.

A lot of people suffer from impostor syndrome. It is a feeling that you are not good enough in some way. Why do you think that? Is there any evidence that it is true? What if it is true? Could you get better with some work?

It could be why you don’t take a risk. It could keep you from trying because deep inside there is a voice saying you are not good enough. You might fail, it's true. There are no guarantees and no one owes you anything. But fear, or those negative voices, could be stopping you from even trying. There’s no guarantee of success, but not even trying guarantees failure.

Listen to the thoughts you have during the day. Do you hear things like:

You are no good

You are lazy

You are stupid

You are ugly

You are not good enough

No one likes you

You have no talent

Over time the “you” becomes “I,” and we start believing it is true. These are mental strongholds that influence how you feel about yourself. You don’t remember being told you were stupid, but your subconscious does. Now you believe it and don’t remember why.

These voices can come from many places. Abusive parents, or teachers, are a good starting point. Other kids at school is another likely suspect. Sometimes it is our own minds. Bad things can also come because of a misunderstanding.

There might be some value in finding out where they come from. The greater value is to examine them as objectively as possible. Having a thought, or feeling, does not mean it is true. Then you can speak the truth to those thoughts.

Talk back to yourself

These thoughts can have a great impact on your emotions, and even your actions. They can control your life, so it makes sense to try to find out if they are true or not. Maybe you are lazy and need to work harder. But it may be you have talent and skills and have trouble admitting that to yourself.

If you have the thought, “I am not good enough,” immediately stop and replace that thought. “I am good enough.” Or say, “that is not true about me.”

It is a matter of telling the truth to yourself.

This is not a “name it and claim it” idea. It is not a matter of taking authority over spirits or speaking things into existence. It is a matter of telling the truth to yourself. There’s nothing mystical about it. Recognize things that are not true, and replace those thoughts with things that are true.

As a personal example.

I used to always be late. I would even admit it and laugh at myself. “Yeah ill be late, I always am,” I would say. And it became true because that is what I believed about myself.

I realized I was being disrespectful to others by being late. I also realized I was in control of what I did and that there was no legitimate excuse to be late.

I started making sure I was on time, and I stopped saying I was always late. It took some time, but eventually, I stopped thinking of myself as a late person. I started seeing myself as someone who is responsible and can manage time. I also had to learn to say no to some things.

For a while I had to make a conscious effort, and plan my day, to be on time for things during the day. Today, 30 years later, it is very rare that I am late for anything, and I don’t even have to think about it. I will be on time. That is my mindset now.

It takes time

It has taken years to develop attitudes about yourself. It may take some time, and repetition, to convince your subconscious that what you have believed about yourself for years is not true and that there is a new truth to believe.

There is a lot in the Bible about mental health. The Apostle Paul writes about our thought life, and how to take charge of what goes on in our mind.

Controlling our thoughts is often associated with “sinful” thoughts, but there is no reason to limit what it says.

Paul writes:

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Cor. 10: 3–5

Here is another Medium publication I recently started

Here is one of my ADHD stories