How Writing More Helps with Your Self-Doubting
And there’s even a hidden bonus!
It’s hard to start. The beginnings are always the hardest.
It’s especially hard as an aspiring writer to let your words out into the world, potentially allowing them to be stomped on by, well, everyone. It’s like when birds leave the nest — they are forced to either fly or fall to the ground — there’s no option for anything else.
That’s how it is with writers — let the words fly or kill them by leaving them unwritten.
When I first started writing, I was petrified.
“It’s not good,”
would be my usual response if someone as even mentioned wanting to read my work. But the truth is, I was afraid to show it to the world, let alone to my family or closest friends. It always seemed not good enough, especially when compared to other great writers out there. Looking back now, it seems silly that I even compared myself to them — they had years and years of experience, I had none. But that was my fault.
Unlike me, they were brave enough to put themselves out there either to be praised or to be completely criticized.
I’ve been writing fiction for a while now, I even started writing my own blog, but it wasn’t until I started publishing on Medium that I realized how writing more can reduce your self-doubting:
1. There is no such thing as perfect
You can come close, yes, but essentially nothing is perfect. You can go through your finished work ten times over and it still won’t be perfect. What might appear great in someone’s eyes, might be seen as complete trash in someone else’s. And that’s ok.
The most important thing is that you are satisfied with your work and be realistic about it — perfection isn’t achievable.
2. Writing is a skill
No one is born a genius writer but anyone can improve on this art. Know you will be bad at it at the beginning, but just like with any other skill, you will get better through practice. An opera singer doesn’t come through the legs singing the perfect Puccini’s Nessun Dorma, does it?
You’re not going to be a great writer from the get-go; you will make mistakes, but you will learn to appreciate them and turn them into a learning opportunity. It’s going to be a massive cringe-fest when you look back on your previous work, but that’s good — it means you’ve progressed.
3. People aren’t scary
We’re all afraid of being judged. It’s normal, after all, it’s in our human nature to want to belong and be seen as equal by others. But with putting yourself out there, especially your words, you stand a chance of being laughed at (which honestly happens very rarely…).
Know, the more you do it, the easier it will get. That fear of other people reading your work won’t even cross your mind anymore.
I still remember when I contributed my very first article here on Medium (How to Live Life, According to My Dog), I was so afraid to press Publish. In my mind, that was it. I knew Medium has so many intelligent readers and writers. And the article I’ve written was very personal, it was like I’m revealing myself to the world. When I opened the app the next day, I was scared — but I got my very first clap (shoutout to: Rihab Lajmi) and again all was right with the world. I came back day after day, published something personal day after day, and you know what? I’m still alive. And not even that: I love sharing my work.
It’s really not this huge monster anymore, and if it doesn’t get the response I hoped for, I consider it constructive criticism and an opportunity to improve. And trust me, you will too.
4. Imposter Syndrome
Sure, we all feel like imposters from time to time. I mean, why would a reader want to spend their precious time reading your ideas when there are so many established writers out there, who obviously know what they’re talking about?
Well, because your ideas are important too. They are worth paying attention to. It’s no good keeping them all to yourself when they could impact someone else’s life without you even knowing. Let’s say you had a very rare disease, something no one has ever heard of. Because no one could identify with it, you would probably keep it to yourself, right? Well, what if there was one other person on the other side of the world with the same disease, feeling exactly the same as you. Wouldn’t it be amazing if that person one day stumbled upon your work and realized they’re not alone? How would that make you feel, the knowledge that your words helped someone else?
The point is: your words are important, you just won’t know it until you actually put them out there.
5. Hidden bonus!
Writing more has not only reduced my self-consciousness but also showed me the ‘mistakes’ I make which I didn’t notice before.
For example, since I write more, I’ve discovered I have a pattern of continuously using the same words (especially when trying to amplify a thought) — now every time I catch myself writing them, I force myself to search for an alternative. Not only am I becoming braver, but I’m also improving on my writing skill.
What will your uncovered ‘mistake’ be?
Look, doubting is normal. And in a healthy amount it can even be beneficial (you can’t improve if you think you’re already the best of the best). But it becomes a problem when you let it stand on the way towards achieving your dreams. You can still, however, do something about making these doubts in your mind go away. One way is through writing more. Naturally, they won’t leave immediately and for forever, but even if they travel on a short vacation, it’s completely worth it.
Please don’t think you’re alone in this; we all make mistakes and we are all still growing and trying to learn.
Now publish that article you were already overthinking about too much; you’ve got this!
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