How White Are White Lies
One bitter truth behind white lies.
In his TED Talk, Jeff Hancock, a Professor in the Department of Communication at Stanford University, shares that, on average, each one of us lies at least once or twice a day.
Now, you think you don’t.
Of course, you don’t.
Unless did you compliment someone today but didn’t 100% believe in it?
Or wait, did you answer somebody’s ‘How are you?’ with ‘I am fine, thank you!’?
Or my favourite, “My battery is dying” or “Sorry, I have to go, my boss just called,” when in reality you don’t want to talk to them any longer?
There! Gotcha!
Liar, liar, pants on fire.
That was a plain white lie.
There is a difference between an average liar (the one who blurts out white lies once or twice a day) and a prolific liar.
In the study, ‘Variation in the Prevalence of Lying, ’ researchers created a statistical model for distinguishing prolific liars from the everyday or ‘normal’ liar. One of these is that a prolific liar tells five and a half lies for every white lie told by an average person.
That is, prolific liars tell 19.1 lies for every single big lie told by an average person.
Regardless. A lie is still a lie. White or not.
In “Three Reasons Why White Lies Are The Worst Solutions To Your Problems,” Bruce Weinstein writes,
“Calling a white lie “trivial” suggests that a white lie is somehow better or more ethically justifiable than other kinds of lies. This links the concept of whiteness with goodness. As such, it has racial implications that make it a term worth jettisoning. That’s not political correctness gone amuck; it’s simple respect.”
Strangely, our brain has a funny way of justifying white lies to be ‘noble’ and hence are categorized within pro-social behaviour.
Here are examples of a few common white lies often overused:
- It wasn’t me! Because some things aren’t just worth taking credits for.
- Oh yeah! That makes sense. Because option B involves admitting that I am clueless.
- Thank you so much! I just love it. Because telling someone, their gift is inappropriate would make me look like an insensitive jerk.
- Yeah, you look great in that dress. Because it’s better than seeing her in tears.
- Oh, things would have been different if I was there! Because I am Iron-man and can always make a difference.
- I am 29. Because 29 sounds like 20 years younger than 30.
- Yeah, I’ll start working on that ASAP. Because telling you that I have ten things to do first would irritate you.
- Yes, Helena was with me last night. Because that’s what best friends do. We agree and ask questions later.
