How To Write On An Emotionally Difficult Day
Drafts are always important.
Last week, I wrote one of the most difficult piece, I have ever written.
I do not call that piece one of the most difficult because of its content. I call it that because, it was a very emotionally heavy day for me.
I am an abuse survivor. The first to tell you that growth is linear. The first to tell you closure is overrated. The first to tell you that with healing, it is important to keep it moving.
Thing is- I can tell you all that and I do mean every single one of it-
on a really good day.
What do you do when you have to write on a really bad day?
A bad day for me is hardly ever that I woke up, my milk has gone bad because my fridge crapped out, my daughter was difficult to dress up for school or that someone was rude to me in traffic.
Those examples are frustrating no doubt but as an abuse survivor, a difficult day for me is a day I wake up from bed and I am paralyzed with fear.
What if I fall into another abuse? What if I never fully recover?
A difficult day for me is a day I am paralyzed with pain because my mind refuses to obey my head and stop reliving the endless abuses I went through.
And I try.
That is always the most painful part- forcing your mind to stop going down those painful trails and it seems hellbent on being like a chicken- dig up dirt and scatter it all over you.
Emotionally difficult days are hard but discipline demands consistency.
As a writer, I am determined that while I heal, I must write.
I did not use to do that.
Pain used to dictate if I could go to the gym, be productive, be happy. My feelings were my facts. I have progressed beyond days pain drives me rather than me being in the driver’s seat.
Not anymore.
And I wish I can tell you that it is easy. No. It still is not but, I have found 2 ways to get around my pain-FULL days emotionally difficult days:
- Know the draft section on Medium and the other writing platforms you use? Make them a must-use option. I have a few articles in my drafts. When I feel like a topic should be good, I go to the platform I think it should be good for and I write there- in the draft.
How does this help you write on emotionally difficult days?
Simple: You don’t have to think much on a topic. You just flesh out a draft and hit publish.
One benefit of consistency getting through a difficult day is that- you somehow feel accomplished. You have this feeling of gratitude that- you at least accomplished something that day. You did something.
The day wasn’t a total waste.
- End your notes in your draft on a cliffhanger.
When you end your notes on a cliffhanger, your mind wants to return to it. On an emotionally difficult day, through the fog of pain and disillusionment, you can always remember ‘ah, let me at least finish that’.
If you already have something that you can get to finish, it is easier to get to it.
Most days, I do not spiral down the tunnel of pain. I am healing. I have more days of gratitude than not. I have more happy days than not.
I do know though that my life got better because I got more intentional.
I do not delude myself that from hereon out, I will never have an emotionally difficult day.
I accept there are days that will be hard and so, I plan for it like I plan for an umbrella when there will be rain or tank tops when there will be heat.
Writing through pain should be planned out too. Play it by ear and you will lose.
Plan it out and every time you hit that publish button, it will be one more way you heal. You stick it to pain!
Pain, you may have me down but here is my victory sword piercing through your side. Take that!
Thank you for reading. Buy me a coffee?
