How to Stay Present While Dealing with Tough Situations

The solutions do appear only if we are willing to wait for them.

“Change is the law of the universe. You can be a millionaire, or a pauper in an instant. Therefore, being proud of your wealth is a sign of immaturity.”

— The Bhagavad Gita

In life, everything is temporary. Pain, pleasure, love, family issues, you name it. One day we think our world is falling apart. Next, everything seems to be magically taken care of.

In this roller-coaster of life, we stumble, lose balance, and fall, hurting ourselves emotionally and physically. But in this topsy-turvy life, one thing remains common. We never stop moving towards the next milestone.

Sometimes the curve balls life throws at us are too much to deal with. You may have noticed that when something goes wrong, a series of unfortunate events follow.

Recently, I had to do a couple of repairs, and they all happened all at once. The timing of it all seemed odd but expected.

Slowly and steadily, we try to untangle one knot at a time. And before we know it, everything falls into place until we fall into the same trap again.

Everything Has an Expiry Date

What do we consider as a constant? Yes, the answer is nothing as there is nothing called ‘permanent’ in life. Except for change and the realisation that whatever we are going through has an expiry date: the good and the bad.

I have this tendency to sink when something goes off. I keep contemplating on that incident and forget to live in the present.

Everything that I do after an unfortunate event is half-hearted because I am so fixated on how to get that challenging situation rectified.

However, with time, the situation comes to an end. It’s then I wonder, what was the point of ruining sleep and mental peace over it?

But it’s not easy to think like that. We all go through harrowing events where we have no idea how to get out of it, and most of the things we sweat about are the ones we cannot control. The only thing we can control is how we react to it.

What Can We Do About It?

So, after a lot of thinking, I chose to analyse my actions. To observe how I behave when something doesn’t go according to plan and here are my conclusions:

• I panic, and my heart rate increases like it’s rushing to catch a train just about to leave the station.
• I keep replaying the event over and over in my head.
• I lose my appetite.
• I didn’t talk to anyone and chose to be left alone.
• I keep thinking about how to rectify the situation, and when nothing comes up, I get frustrated.

All of this is natural and usually is how we react to helpless situations. But as I noted these few points in the notes section of my phone, I slowly started to do something about it.

Talk to someone: I somehow pushed myself to talk about it when I couldn’t think straight. A third perspective helped calm my racing heart.

Detach: Not easy but gets easier by the minute. I decided to read and then watch a movie. It doesn’t solve the problem but gives the mind a break.

Write: Sometimes, the mind needs an outlet. I just vented about it all and felt like a burden had been lifted from my chest.

Sleep over it: Somehow, with letting some time pass, it gets a bit easier to deal with the issue. I think it’s because the intensity of that situation is highly reduced the next day. So, I just fell asleep, exhausted by thinking all day long.

Wait for the solution: The hardest of all, but solutions appear if we wait for them. With time the silver lining appears and once we get something that we can work on, only thinking about it then makes sense.

Some Things You Just Cannot Control

The rules are the same. Focus on the things you can control. What you cannot, just let it go. There is a reason it’s uncontrollable, which means when you cannot do anything about it, so let things be.

With any challenging circumstance, one thing is vital — the lessons. We go through the grind and learn hidden aspects about ourselves that we would never have otherwise.

Every situation is temporary. However, the wait to figure out the solution is what drives us insane. But if we are met with that situation, know that there is a reason that will ultimately be for our benefit.

And there is one lesson from the Bhagwat Gita that I always chant like a mantra:

“Whatever happened, happened for the good. Whatever is happening, is happening for the good. Whatever will happen, will also happen for the good.”

— The Bhagavad Gita

So, no matter what you’re going through right now, know that eventually, everything will make sense. It may not seem like it right now but trust me; it will. All you’ve got to do is hang in there and know that everything is happening for our highest, most loving good.

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Also, do read this colourful haiku by Fiza Ameen.

Thanks so much for your time!