How To Stay Optimistic When Life Is Not Going Your Way

Focus on what you have, call a friend, and do things you love.

Sometimes life doesn’t go our way. We may have those times that we don’t feel we have accomplished our goals, and life is not how we would like to be.

For instance, you wanted to make a certain amount of money this year. Furthermore, you can have health issues, canceled plans, or your relationships are suffering.

The list goes on.

Are you experiencing one of those times?

No worries, I believe that we all do at a certain point in our lives. It’s a part of the journey of life. We may go through ups and downs from time to time.

Thus, today I will share some things you can do that I have done to stay optimistic when life does not go my way.

Focus On What You Have

When getting in a rut, we might get to a cycle of negative thinking. That is, we might focus on the things that are going wrong in our lives. As a result, ignoring the things that are working on a day to day basis.

Experiencing the negative thinking loop might bring us to feel overwhelmed, perhaps, even hopeless in some situations.

What has worked for me to break out of the negative loop and stay positive is to focus on what I have in my life. Also, I focused on what is working in my life and be grateful for it.

Focusing and being grateful even for the smallest things I have in my life has helped me have a positive attitude and go through the times when things are not going so well.

Thus, I would start seeing opportunities I did not see before, compared to when I was stuck in a negative loop.

Furthermore, I would see solutions to problems that I often overlooked.

Here are things you can focus on:

• Having a roof over your head
• You have access to the Internet to read this article
• Food on your table
• Health
• Family
• Shoes, so you don’t have to walk barefoot in the streets.

Once you have identified things you have, expand on them, and as you start feeling better, you might change your outlook on what’s bothering you in your life.

The key is to get you away from focusing on the dark aspects of your life, but the things that make you feel better. I know this may be hard, but give it a try, you have nothing to lose.

This Too Shall Pass

You might have heard of the saying “This too shall pass” before, but it is true. Everything in life is not permanent. We are always evolving.

For example, you went to elementary school, middle, and high school. Then, you entered college (if you went to college). These are phases in your life, some more pleasurable, others not as much.

Nonetheless, these phases don’t last forever. This applies to this phase may be going through right now, where your life sucks, is not what you wanted it to be.

“Nothing lasts forever — not even your troubles.” ― Arnold H. Glasow

So, your life is not always going to be this way, trust me, I have been through times that have sucked as well.

Call A Friend Or Family Member

Another thing that has helped me get through the phases when life does not go my way is to call (or talk face to face) a friend or a family member. Then, I would tell them what is bothering me.

What has surprised me the most when calling a friend or family member, is that they might help you see solutions you didn’t see before.

Having another perspective may assist you in getting out of your head and see things how they are.

“One of the most beautiful qualities of friendship is to understand and to be understood.” — Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Sometimes, when life is not going our way, we might get emotional and tend to exaggerate how big our problems are. So, by calling someone you trust, they might help you not over exaggerate and separate your emotions from your problems.

Also, they might make you laugh, which can help you feel better, which is always a good thing.

Tip: Try calling a positive friend or family member.

When calling or talking to someone face to face, pick a person who is encouraging and optimistic. That is someone who can listen and give you constructive feedback.

Try avoiding negative people. It can lead you deeper into the negative thinking cycle. The idea is to help you get out of it and move to a positive frame of mind.

Do Things You Love

When going through a tough time, doing things I enjoy has helped me get through these tough phases in my life.

Here are some suggestions:

• Play an instrument
• Journal
• Go on a walk on the beach
• Go out to see a movie
• Talk to a friend
• Try learning something new
• Draw, color or paint
• Go to a museum
• Go out on nature
• Meditate

The key is to channel all this negative energy into something positive. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, blaming others, or how life has played out, doing things you like doing can help you distract yourself.

Thus, step away from your troubles for a second, and solutions may come to you.

You never know, doing things you love, you might tap on talents you didn’t know you had. You can monetize them; hence, problem solved (if one of your problems is financial).

In my life, when I am not focusing so much on the negative aspects of the situation I am going through, solutions come to me because I am not stuck on seeing the problem all the time.

In other words, give yourself a break. This has worked wonders for me.

Takeaways

If you are going through a tough time in your life right now, I understand you, we all go through difficult times in our lives at some time or another.

However, don’t stay stuck in negativity. Try to focus on what you have. This can help you change your perspective on the good things in your life.

Hence, you will start thinking of the solution to your problems instead of focusing your energy on the issue.

The key is to channel your energy to something positive to get you moving in a positive direction.

I know it may be hard at first, but trust me, it will be worth it. These are things that have helped me in my life.

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Disclaimer: I am not a mental health, or counseling professional. These tips and advice are based on my experience and opinion as a student, tutor, teacher, and software developer. Everyone is different, so the advice shared in this article may or may not work for you.