How to Recognize Beliefs That Are Holding You Back

Let go of some of your parents’ outdated beliefs that no longer serve you.

It seems we all have been brainwashed since birth. It’s kind of wild that we have no choice about the beliefs that are imparted to us from a young age.

We arrive here on Earth full of wonder with no preconceived notions about how the world is. The world just is.

We are amused by a simple game of peek-a-boo. We laugh every time. It’s not in us yet to judge the game. We don’t scowl thinking, man is this stupid…does she think she disappears when she puts her hands over her face? What a dope.

We don’t play peek-a-boo as a means to an end — to get to something else. We just experience the sheer joy of it at the moment.

And then … bam! We get a bit older, learn to communicate with words, and suddenly we are hearing other people’s perceptions about the world and how to live in it.

We don’t know that there might be other perspectives because we are just little kids, so we adopt these beliefs and perceptions as our own.

Wouldn’t it be great if we had had the wherewithal back then to proclaim, “No, this is bullshit!” when a belief was getting installed that would turn out to hinder us later in life? If we could have held on to our wonder and curiosity instead of replacing them with judgment?

We learn from our parents, whether they meant to teach us or not.

My mom was a very nervous driver to the point where she stopped driving altogether for many years. One of the things she absolutely hated was taking left-hand turns, and if there was any kind of traffic forget it. She would alter her route, significantly even, to avoid having to take a left.

My Mom has been gone for 18 years. Who do you think is avoiding left-hand turns now?

I think I have been doing it unconsciously all these years. Yes, I will take a left — I don’t avoid them entirely. But I found myself plotting an alternate route the other day to avoid turning left on a street that can be busy at times but is nowhere near impossible to get out on.

Since I actually noticed myself doing this I was able to proclaim bullshit! and I kept on the original route. I laughed because it’s not logical or practical … I was just doing it because I picked up the belief from my mom that taking a left-hand turn is frightening. Who’s the dope now?

On top of this tiny belief specifically about left-hand turns, I also had bestowed upon me the larger belief that driving in and of itself is scary and dangerous.

That awesome belief led to me having panic attacks while driving. Think a roller coaster ride is scary? Try hurtling down the highway while losing the feeling in your limbs on the verge of passing out or throwing up. Now that’s a fun ride!

How to recognize limiting beliefs

Is there something you have always wanted to do, but before even putting any thought into it you dismiss it right away? Bingo — limiting belief.

Is there something that causes you anxiety, even though you don’t know anyone else who seems to be bothered by it? You got it — limiting belief. Remember the riveting story of the left-hand turn? — there you go.

Is there a certain thing that you are quick to judge in others? Pay attention — what we judge about others is often something we judge in ourselves. And it all can be caused by a limiting belief we picked up as kids.

We can change our beliefs

Here is the exciting part — we have the capacity to change our beliefs. We don’t have to keep the old junky beliefs that well-meaning but perhaps misguided people imparted to us. We do have a choice now — we can proclaim bullshit on any belief that limits us.

You know what else? We can reclaim our wonder and curiosity.

We can look at a bird in flight and be amazed. We can marvel at the expanse of the sky and the pictures in the clouds.

We can actually see things rather than labelling them … if we choose to.

To wrap things up

Beliefs are just thoughts we think over and over until they become true for us. Our parents, or the people who raised us, formulated our initial belief system.

The first step to making positive change is to recognize the beliefs we carry that limit us in some way.

Once you have identified a limiting belief you can investigate it. Was this something I learned as a child that is no longer relevant? Or perhaps is it something I learned later in life from a teacher or peer that doesn’t resonate with the life I want to live now?

The best part — now you get to choose. You get to choose the thoughts and beliefs that support the kind of life you want to live. And in that choice lies total freedom. Life isn’t just happening to you anymore. Instead, you are creating the life you want to live.

And the next time someone decides to engage you in peek-a-boo, you can choose to crack up instead of scowl and judge (mostly because wouldn’t it be funny as adults if someone actually did that?).

Enjoy your new empowering beliefs! Go forth and create the life you always dreamed of but didn’t believe you could have.

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