How to Meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same
You are what you repeatedly do; therefore excellence ought to be a habit, not an act. — Aristotle
Goals.
Ending milestones reached by the means to get there.
We all have goals, but not all of us set them. An unset goal is nothing more than a desire, a dream. When we define them and write them down, they are set. We are ready to act upon them.
We all know about goals. At one time or another, probably several times in our lives, mentors — teachers, coaches, parents, grandparents, sales managers, drill sergeants, probation officers, etc. — have instructed us on these things. I’m not preaching anything new, we’ve all been there, done that.
However, let’s take one more thing into consideration for an exercise in goal setting:
Generosity
A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. — Proverbs 11:25
To be honest, I only learned this recently in my life, that is, in the past fifteen years or so (and I’m kinda old). All my life I’ve been told to give to the poor, to give 10% of what I earn to charity. Admittedly, I haven’t always done this. It has been easy for me to give something monetarily once in a while and feel good about it; maybe an extra twenty in the plate on Christmas Eve, maybe mail off fifty to some organization for old vets. But I never knew exactly what percentage of my income I gave. And the quick giving was like eating fries with no burger — it was good while it lasted, but my hunger wasn’t satisfied. I always had some guilt about it (the lack of giving, not the lack of burger).
Then my grandsons started playing sports, and the old coach in me started drilling them on setting goals.
“Figure out your major goals,” I’d say. “Set them higher than you first think. Your goals should be lofty, not easy.
“Now write them down. They aren’t goals until you write them out. In fact, it’d be a good practice to write them every day.”(The great Emmitt Smith said he always did that) “For sure, read them every day.”
I picture myself as the wise old grandpa, so I kept after them. “Okay, those are your Major Goals, your High, Lofty, There’s-No-Way-I-Can-Do-That Goals. Now, break each of those down into minor, everyday goals that will step you towards reaching your major goals.”
That got me several groaning comments and eye-rolls. That’s okay, because you come to expect those when you’re a wise old grandparent.
Then it dawned on me: I oughta practice what I preach.
So, I wrote out five major goals of my own. The fifth one was: Give 10% of what I earn to charity. I stared at those goals for a few minutes, and then — I don’t know, maybe it was the guilt thing — I cut #5 and pasted it as #1.
Then came the minor goal setting.
[Small confession time: I’m sort of a spreadsheet freak. I know, I know, life’s too short to waste doing spreadsheets, but I just can’t help myself. It helps me control things a little better. It’s a demon for which I’ve yet to find an exorcism. Maybe that ought to be a goal.]
I broke down Major #1 into months, weeks, days, how much and when. Like that pillow guy on TV — “Only pennies a day!” And you know what? Yeah, piece of cake. And greatly rewarding. Not only because I’m reaching a major goal, but I’m accomplishing something beyond my own self-interest.
Having learned that, I began to realize something else.
Giving all you can materially is good, but there’s more to generosity than money, something deeper. I wrote minor goals for each of my other major goals to include some form of generosity to fit them. I found practicing that rewards my soul far beyond just giving money.
The cliches, “You reap what you sow” and “The more you give, the more you will receive” are Biblical paraphrases that are also wisdom and truth.
Our peer and colleague Sinem Günel touched on this in her terrific ILLUMINATION piece:
Another great example which illustrates how to use generosity in your goal-setting is Terry Mansfield’s piece on Reciprocity:
Lord knows, our society could use a good dose of generosity,
not just from our leaders but from each of us. President John F. Kennedy once said,
“In a time of domestic crisis, men of goodwill and generosity should be able to unite regardless of party or politics.”
I can see a plethora of goals with embedded generosity in that arena. Perhaps it should start with we the people and our children to hopefully and prayerfully work it’s way down (I don’t have a high regard for them) to the knuckleheads in charge.
Good enough isn’t good enough if it can be better, and better isn’t better if it can be best. — Ozzie Smith
The above quote is one of those gems I like to spout off to my grandboys. Of course, I don’t attribute the source, so they’ll think it comes from me and therefore, think me wise. I need all the help I can get.
Admiral William McRaven, retired Navy SEAL commander, once said in a commencement speech at his alma mater, Texas University,
“You will all have an opportunity to inspire someone around you. Never, ever miss that opportunity.”
That’s another truth. Those opportunities come up more than we realize, so we should be generous with our inspiration. In fact, I want to share some of Admiral McRaven’s generous inspiration in a video from Goalcast.
I have so many great colleagues I’m following on this platform. Here’s this week’s Distinguished Dozen. I strongly urge you to take a look at their offerings: Nathan White, Anne Young, Tree Langdon, Holly Jahangiri, Nomanono Isaacs, Tim Maudlin, JeffHerring.com, Donna L Roberts, PhD (Psych Pstuff), James Frank Sanders, Jacquelyn Lynn, Libby Mitchell, Debra (Debi) Yvonne Simmons
If we’re not acquainted, let’s do that. I’ll start:
I’d like to give you a gift
Click the image above to visit my website. When you join my Readers Group, I’ll send you a free copy of my short story collection, Skins Game.
