How to Manage your Relationships in Quarantine

You’re not alone, and shouldn’t have to feel that way

When COVID-19 struck in 2020, the entire world turned upside down. Introverts went into a year-long celebration of finally getting some alone time, but for others, it was a disaster.

Extroverts all over the globe brought up an important question. How do you stay connected when you’re not allowed to be within 6 feet of each other? How would you survive without interacting at all?

If there is one thing COVID-19 has taught us, however, then it’s the value of strong relationships. Ask yourself this question:

Do I still keep in touch with all the close friends that I had before COVID-19?

If the answer is only some of them, then what changed? Strong relationships aren’t built on always being there in person. That bond should remain strong no matter how far apart we are from them.

Quarantining indoors made many of us realise who our close friends were, and while it may have seemed like a difficult time, the pandemic may have been one of the few opportunities to make us realise that.

Find Time to Invest in Relationships

Before the pandemic, I would have weekly catchups with my manager. During times when a laptop wasn’t needed, we would go for a walk outside the office and talk about how the week had gone.

I loved those moments, especially when the weather was good. Getting out of the office during the afternoon and grabbing a coffee were some of the small pleasures in a busy working schedule.

You might think COVID-19 would put an end to this, but it didn’t. Although I was working from home, I knew I could still go on walks and catch up with my manager via the Zoom app on my phone.

And that’s exactly what I did.

I downloaded Zoom on my phone, let my manager know beforehand whether I needed to share my screen or not, and if I didn’t, I’d go outside with my earphones.

And it was great! Getting fresh air when you’re stuck working from home is a completely different experience to doing the same when you’re working from an office.

Killing 2 Birds with 1 Stone

Having strong working relationships is important. I spend most of my day at work, and if I don’t get on well with my colleagues, how could I possibly get on with the people in my personal life?

Real friendships can take years to build but can collapse in mere days.

This has never been more true than during the long lockdown many of us faced in 2020.

“Friendships can deteriorate very quickly if you don’t invest in them — it probably only takes about three months” — Prof Robin Dunbar

But the lockdown also brought another problem. Gyms and leisure centres were closed, which meant the only way that I could exercise was to go outside for walks and runs. I didn’t have the equipment to train at home, so I started making it a regular habit to go on a 1–2 hour long walk after work instead.

Going on these walks became the perfect time to reconnect with friends I hadn’t spoken to in a while. I’d take my earphones, let them know I was free and then hop on a video call. There was no rush to end the call early either since I was far from home, and that meant we could have genuine deep conversations.

It doesn’t just have to be walking. Maybe you could try talking to a friend on speaker mode while you cook, or recreate that feeling of eating together by co-ordinating calls when you have dinner.

Many people feel they’re too busy to invest time in their relationships, but all it takes is knowing when you have the luxury of time.

Transform Everyday Habits into Social Ones

Netflix saw a record number of signups in 2020. It’s not surprising, given everyone was bored being stuck at home.

How many friends do you know that have a Netflix account? Now ask yourself how many of those friends watch the same shows as you?

If you enjoy the same shows, why are you watching them on your own and not with each other? Their mere presence, even if it’s virtual is enough to make you feel happier, and that’s a powerful feeling.

Someone once told me about a show called ‘Schitt's Creek’ which had really positive reviews. But there were a lot of seasons and a lot of episodes in each one!

Why don’t we watch this together then?

It didn’t take long before we found an extension called ‘Netflix Party’, now called ‘Teleparty’, and that was a game-changer. As long as we both had a Netflix account, we could watch and chat at the same time.

We made it a daily habit to watch 2 episodes each evening, and it was actually something I started to look forward to. We would talk about the show, make jokes about the characters and it felt wonderful to be able to have that connection during a time when we couldn’t see each other in person.

But it’s not just Netflix. Amazon Prime Video also has a feature called ‘Watch Party’. And if that’s not an option either, streaming through Discord works just as well too.

Don’t spend weekends watching films on your own. Find a close friend or someone that has similar interests, and ask them if they want to join. It’s so easy to do and you won’t ever feel alone.

Create Challenges and Motivate Each Other

At the start of the pandemic, stocks crashed. But with it, came huge opportunities to learn about investing and take advantage of the market recovery.

I had a cousin the same age as me, and we both saw what was happening. We were always interested in the stock market, but it wasn’t until we found a commission-free trading platform that we decided 2020 would be a good time to jump in.

Because we grew up together, we were open about how much we had to invest, and what type of companies were worth putting money into. Talking about finance is a scary topic for people, but why should it be, when both sides can mutually benefit?

Every weekday at lunch, we would hop on a call and discuss what was going on in the market. It became a great way to learn as well, and it didn’t take long before my brother joined too. We would make jokes about each other, about Elon Musk, and even speak about how we could start our own hedge fund.

And whenever one person would lose money, the rest of us would try to inspire them so they wouldn’t lose hope.

It’s easy to make poor decisions when you’re doing things on your own. There’s no feedback, no way to know if something is working and no one to reassure you that things will turn out well. But when you have others who can act as a sounding board, that’s when you’re able to achieve your full potential.

Whether we’re in quarantine due to COVID-19 or simply alone at home, finding ways to connect becomes ever more important. Prolonged loneliness can lead to mental health issues and a feeling of pessimism. None of us should have to deal with that.

Fortunately, with so many tools at our disposal, we should have no excuse for letting ourselves or our relationships wither away. We’re lucky that we’re not having to quarantine at a time before the internet existed.

What would we do, and how would we cope then?

Don’t let a relationship that you spent years investing in fall away. Take the initiative. Reach out and just send a message asking how they are.

We like it when people think of us, so imagine how they’d feel knowing you’ve thought of them.

Disclaimer — Note that some of the products I’ve recommended in this story contain affiliate links