avatarLiberty Forrest, Author

Summary

The web content discusses the art of making a point in an argument through a conversation between Witchy and the author, drawing parallels between a Zen Master's teaching on open-mindedness and the futility of aggressive communication in resolving disagreements.

Abstract

In the narrative, Witchy, a character illustrated by the author, presents a drawing of an octopus and seeks to understand the idiom "The best defence is a good offence." The author explains the idiom, noting its aggressive nature and how it applies not only to warfare between nations but also to personal conflicts where individuals prioritize their own arguments over listening to others. The discussion then shifts to a Zen Master's story illustrating the importance of being receptive to new ideas, likening a cup filled to the brim with tea to a mind closed to understanding. The author concludes that true resolution of disputes requires open communication, contrasting this with the common but ineffective practice of relentlessly asserting one's own viewpoint.

Opinions

  • The idiom "The best defence is a good offence" is seen as promoting aggression, which is not conducive to resolving personal conflicts.
  • People often engage in verbal "warfare," focusing on winning the argument rather than achieving mutual understanding.
  • The Zen Master's story serves as a metaphor for the need to approach discussions with an open mind, free from preconceived notions.
  • The author criticizes the common human tendency to "hammer home" personal viewpoints without listening to others, considering it a counterproductive approach to argument resolution.
  • The narrative suggests that to effectively make a point during an argument, one must be willing to listen and consider the other side, fostering a space for actual resolution and understanding.

How To Make Your Point During an Argument

…Or a story of missiles, Zen Masters and tea

Photo courtesy of author: Illustration by Witchy

Witchy came spinning through my kitchen after drawing this picture. She couldn’t wait to show it to me. She was especially proud of the octopus.

“Don’t you love it? Isn’t he cute? I want to kiss him,” she giggled. “And I bet he gives the best hugs.”

“Yes, Witchy, he’s adorable. Nice job — again.”

“Thank you. Say, I heard something the other day and — well, I’m not sure what it means.”

“What’s that?”

“Somebody said, ‘The best defence is a good offence’ and this didn’t make sense to me. But then, I am still learning English and it is so hard sometimes.”

“I know, Witchy. It’s not an easy one but you’re doing really well.”

“Thank you, that makes me feel better! So…what does that mean, about a defence?”

“It means that if you want to defend yourself against an impending or possible attack, it’s best to be the one to attack first.”

“That doesn’t sound very nice!”

“It isn’t. It’s bad enough when countries at war do this to each other but a lot of people do it, too.”

“They go to war with each other?” Witchy’s mouth dropped open.

“Well, sort of. Not with missiles and tanks and that sort of thing, but with their words. They try to hurt each other. They forget that they really love and care about each other. They’re so concerned with getting their own points across that they don’t even bother trying to hear the other side of the discussion.”

“How is that supposed to help?”

“Well, it isn’t.”

“That’s so dumb.”

“I agree, Witchy, but sadly, it’s what a lot of people do.”

“What was that story you taught me about the Zen Master?”

“Which one?”

“The one with the university professor who wanted to talk to him about Zen?”

“Oh, yes. Well, the professor began talking about Zen and the Master began pouring tea into a cup. The professor kept talking. The Master kept pouring until tea was overflowing everywhere.

“The professor yelled, ‘That’s enough! No more will go in!’ And the Master said, ‘That cup is you. If you’re so full of your own knowledge, you have no room for new information.’”

“Yes!” exclaimed Witchy. “That sounds kind of like what you said about the best defence being a good offence!”

“Yeah, Witchy, it’s kind of the same. Too often when people disagree, they just hammer home their own points, yammering at each other, mouths open, ears and minds closed, temperatures rising and no one is listening. How do they think they can ever resolve anything like that?”

“Like I said, that’s so dumb.”

“Mm-hmm. Sure is.”

Witchy has a short, sweet message for you:

💜🤗 Buy me a Witch’s Brew and support my mission to light up the world with Hope, Healing and Humour! Thank you for your kindness! 💜

Published at thewitchyone.com

©Liberty Forrest All Rights Reserved

Life Lessons
Communication Skills
Dysfunctional Family
Witch
Relationships
Recommended from ReadMedium