Summary

The article outlines two approaches for leaders to effectively help their team members grow and solve problems: a solution-focused approach addressing external, practical challenges, and a transformation-focused approach addressing internal challenges related to self-awareness and limiting beliefs.

Abstract

The article "How to “HELP” not “FIX”? (by listening to the problem)" presents a guide for leaders on how to support and develop their teams through coaching. It emphasizes the importance of listening and understanding before offering solutions, as people often seek emotional support rather than immediate fixes. The author distinguishes between two types of challenges team members may face: those that are external and actionable, and those that are internal and related to personal growth. The solution-focused approach aims to convert external challenges into solvable problems by identifying actionable steps. In contrast, the transformation-focused approach encourages self-reflection to address internal challenges, such as limiting beliefs or lack of self-awareness, thereby fostering individual growth. The article illustrates these approaches with examples, demonstrating how a "helper" can ask the right questions to discern the type of help needed and provides a preview of upcoming articles that will delve deeper into each approach.

Opinions

Leaders should avoid the "fix it" syndrome by not immediately suggesting solutions but instead coaching their team members to grow and solve their own problems.
The solution-focused approach is goal-oriented, aiming to turn challenges into practical problems that can be solved with the right actions.
The transformation-focused approach is centered on personal development, encouraging individuals to learn from their challenges by questioning their beliefs and assumptions.
A helper's role is to ask insightful questions to understand the nature of the problem and provide the appropriate type of assistance, whether it's addressing external practicalities or internal personal growth.
The article suggests that effective help involves listening actively and coaching team members to find their own solutions, thereby empowering them rather than fostering dependency on the leader for quick fixes.

How to “HELP” not “FIX”? (by listening to the problem)

A conscious guide to coaching your team and helping them grow

Have you heard of the “fix it” syndrome?

Someone tells you a problem, and you suggest a solution. However, they don’t want it and get frustrated you DON’T LISTEN!

It happens with partners, friends, and family members who expect your emotional support and listening.

Leaders can’t only “listen” nor “fix” at work. They need to coach and HELP people grow and solve their problems. This can be done with two approaches:

Solution-focused:

The challenges are external, and on the “doing” level. People can solve them, but don’t know how.

Goal: turning challenges into practical problems and exploring the actionable steps needed to solve them.

Transformation-focused:

The challenges are internal, and on the “being” level. People cannot solve them, because of limiting beliefs, lack of self-awareness, or wrong expectations.

Goal: turning challenges into learning experiences through self-reflection and questioning one’s beliefs and assumptions to grow as an individual.

A “helper” asks questions to figure out the correct approach and give the right type of help.

Example 1:

Teammate: I’m always stressed about my workload. It feels too much!

Helper: like the sheer volume of work? Or something else that makes it unmanageable?

Teammate: Not just the volume. I feel I should be able to handle it, but I am struggling!

The problem here is internal. It’s about the person’s expectations, assumptions, and management skills, not the tasks themselves.

Example 2:

Teammate: I think our teamwork sucks. Meetings are unproductive, and the project is delayed.

Helper: Hmm… what do you think we should do to improve it?

Teammate: Let’s share a clear agenda with everyone before the meeting and follow up on the action items.

The problem is external. It’s about the actions needed to solve it, not the people themselves.

Thanks for reading! I will go through each approach in the coming articles.

Read parts two and three of this series.