How To Get What You Want From Life

It all comes back to one truth: you get what you’re prepared to tolerate.

It’s tempting to think that we’ll achieve everything we want. But then, why don’t so many of us? Why do some people achieve success, and others jealously wish they could’ve done the same?

I found the answer in one of the best books I’ve read over the past 12 months, The Wealthy Gardener.

‘Our lives’ conditions are not determined by what we want, but by what we will accept and tolerate.’

We don’t receive what we want in life. Instead, receive what we can tolerate. We get what we can accept silently, even though we might have wanted something else.

If you want to be rich, but will accept working a 9–5 job, you’ll get the latter.

If you want to become a successful writer, writing books and living on your terms, but will accept working as a copywriter for somebody else on UpWork, that’s what you’ll get.

And if you want to travel the world, but will accept waiting 40 years until you retire, you’ll not enjoy the travels when you’re young.

Everyone is making the exact amount of money they need.

If you think that’s not true, tell me, what do you need this extra money for? A lot of people either don’t have an answer to that. Or the answer is too vague for them to be motivated.

The good news is, we can work on changing our attitude.

How to Live the Life of Your Dreams

To achieve what you want — and not settle for only what you can ‘tolerate’ — you’ve got to build self-confidence. You’ve got to start loving yourself. Once you love yourself, you’ll not want to give yourself the mediocre results and average life. You’ll want to give yourself only the best.

As the book goes:

Confidence determines what we dream, what we tolerate and what we strive to attain. “It’s not what you are that holds you back,” said Denis Waitley, “it’s what you think you are not.”

To get on the path of building self-trust, confidence, and self-love, we must give ourselves what we want. Too often, the main symptom of lack of self-love is following other people’s dogmas and expectations.

When sitting alone in solitude, ask yourself, “What is it that I want out of life?” and instead of pushing, listen to the answer. Maybe you won’t get an answer immediately, but in time you’ll learn to hear yourself and your inner voice.

And maybe, what you want doesn’t fit into other people’s plans or expectations of you. Who knows, maybe it doesn’t even fit your expectations. You might have thought that you should become a real-estate mogul, but what you want is peace of mind and the ability to write in solitude.

Self-love starts with knowing what you want, your inclinations, and true desires. Once you find that, it’ll be hard to let go of. And then you won’t be able to accept anything less than what you need.

Remember: Life will give you what you can tolerate, not what you want. Once you find your true calling, your soul won’t tolerate anything less than 100% satisfaction.