How To Fix A Messed-Up Life

Life sucks.

It does for all but for some more than others.

There is no one that goes through this thing unscathed and we all die in the end.

Life leaves scars, it will put us to our knees and keep us there, we will cry, fear, and despair, and all may be on a daily basis.

There are so many sayings that go along with this and so many quotes that you can take a thousand of them and still find more people to say that life sucks in different ways.

Life sucks.

But, for better or for worse, we are in it.

We may not have chosen to live this life, we may not have asked to be born, and we may not even have wanted to live at all seeing how it’s going right now, but yet, here we are.

…So what now?

Life sucks. It is a constant pain and a constant struggle. What do we do about it?

As I see it we all have three options:

1. End Life.
2. Succumb to Life.
3. Make the best out of Life.

#1 — End Life.

While crass and dark, it is an option that exists and that must be talked about, mainly because most people won’t touch the subject.

You do have it in your power to end your own life.

To most this is a horrible option, a sin, and the “last resort”, but to some it is still the better choice than living a life of pain.

I too had a moment where I thought it would be the better option than continuing to live a life that I felt had no point.

In that moment the pain of living exceeded everything and I will admit that the only reason I am here is because I was too afraid to die, not because I did not want to do it.

Having lived well past that moment, however, I will say the same as most that make it past that bottom line: Life does not have to be miserable.

The biggest reason it feels like that right now is because you do not know how to make it better, not because it does not get better.

It is the subjective experience, not the objective one, that makes you feel life sucks so much, and you are simply too lazy to go out of your way and find the people that could help you.

Of course there are the common excuses:

• “No one would understand me.”
• “My pain is too unique/special/different.”
• “This will not work for me.”
• “I cannot just be happy.”
• “There is no point in trying, I have tried everything already.”

But these are all lies.

When you look at the statistics and talk to professionals, they will discredit all of them, even though most people truly believe them.

Yes, you are unique. Yes, not everyone understands you. Yes, you have tried a lot and may have went more than out of your way to find some help.

But can you truly, 100%, without a shadow of a doubt, say you tried it all?

Because if you can’t, then think twice about this option, for it will be the last one you take.

But, that all being said, it is still your life and your choice.

I know the pain and I cannot stop you from it, I can only say, from my personal experience and my experience helping dozens of people out of the same spot, that it can get better.

#2 — Succumb to Life.

Now, if you are like me and are too afraid to end your life, or you simply feel like that is not an option, then a choice many go for is the one to just succumb to the misery of life.

This is actually the subconscious choice most of the world makes.

Most of the world simply says “Life just sucks”, deal with that as the truth, and sit their butts on the couch and do what they can to distract themselves from life.

Simply said: They give up.

They make the best out of a bad situation, often hating their life but just barely not enough to do anything about it.

By saying “That is just how it is” and by not admitting how bad it actually is, they avoid all the responsibility to change their lives.

Without accepting the pain of life and without accepting that life can get better, they have no reason to try to change anything.

They do this not because they do not want to lead a better life, but because they are secretly too comfortable in their laziness.

Many people who take this choice feel that life should work for them.

They feel that it takes luck, talent, or something else outside themselves for life to become amazing, likely because they see so many examples of it happening this way to other people.

They gave up on working for their life because they feel entitled to a great life without the work.

In the age of the Internet, this only increased, creating a mix of images of success with no work, lucky breaks and still trying to make everyone feel special.

The truth is though that not everyone can get lucky.

Relying on that luck, or feeling entitled to it, will get most to waste enough time so they do not have the time in their life left to make a change.

In the meantime: Life sucks… and there is nothing they want to do about it.

#3 — Make the best out of Life.

The final, and only real choice for a better life, is to take matters in your own hands.

Luck or no luck. Talent or no talent.

Whatever your situation or skills, whatever environment you grew up in, and whatever you had happened to you in your past, life is in your hands now.

You must accept the hand you currently have, no matter how unfair that hand may seem.

Whining about the fact that others have a better hand or that you do not deserve this crap of a hand does not change the hand you have.

Life is what it is.

For right now that is an unchangeable fact.

If your life sucks then it sucks.

If you got unlucky then you got unlucky.

If the world was out to get you, ruined all your chances, and left you with more scars than you can count, then that is what it is.

I do not claim to know what you have been through, nor do I want to say that you do not deserve better or less pain.

I do not want to disregard the crap you had happen to you or how unfair it all was.

The only thing I am saying is that what matters for your future is that you accept where you are now, no matter how hard that may be, so that you can move forward.

When you accept your situation for what it is and do not succumb to the crapstorm that is life, that is when, and only when, things have a chance to get better.

You have every right to be upset, to point the finger at others, even to yell and despair.

But, at the end of it all, it is still on you to pick yourself up and do the work to make your life better.

It is unfair, it is going to be hard, it is not nice or easy or kind or comfortable, but it is the truth.

No one will make life better for you.

You cannot rely on the lucky breaks or that life gives you what you feel you deserve.

Life is not that kind.

Your karma will not balance itself on its own.

You will not be paid for your suffering.

Take that in deep enough so that it hurts.

Let that burn into you so that you finally realize that your life is in your hands.

Which brings us to the only question that matters:

What will you do now?

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