How To Find And Live By Your Values
A 5 step process to more fulfillment
What are your top 5 personal values? If you’re unsure, read on!
Our values are the compass that guides us on our journey through life. The core beliefs that are intrinsically important to us. Yet, too many of us ignore them. Perhaps because we get distracted by other things and people in our lives, or maybe we don’t even know what they are. Instead, we go about our day reacting to the things around us.
Do you ever get the feeling you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing? I don’t mean wrong or illegal. It just doesn’t sit right with your gut, and you’re not sure why. This usually comes up when we are going against our values.
The good news is, knowing your values allows you to live your life with intent and purpose. It grounds you and helps you make better choices that ultimately lead to a happier and more fulfilled life.
Whether or not you are in tune with your inner environment, this 5 step process will help guide you on your way.
Learn your core personal values
There are many ways to learn what your core values are. I recommend the following process.
First, ask yourself a range of personal questions that inspire you to think about what type of person you are, your likes and dislikes, and your desires:
- What achievements are you most proud of in your life
- What are your wildest dreams
- What are you truly passionate about
- If money were no object, what would you do
- Who do you admire and why
Take your time to answer these questions honestly and write your answers down. Let some time pass, perhaps a day or two before you read through them again. Reflect on your answers and ask yourself if they still feel true.
Second, find a list of common personal values. There are countless online, and here is one example for your inspiration. Go through this and other lists and write down all that resonate with you, even if it’s just a little.
Third, go through your own list and narrow down to five values at most. This may be difficult, so spend some time on it. If you’re unsure, choose two values and put them up against each other. Which one is more important to you? Continue doing this until you have no more than five values written down.
Fourth and lastly, write out your list of values in order of priority. Put the value that is most important to you right now, at the top.
With your list of prioritised values, start from the top and follow these next steps.
To demonstrate, let’s use my own personal top value: health.
How do I support this value?
Think about your life and your current circumstances and routines. Determine what is required to support this particular core value. These are your support strategies.
For health:
- Eat nutritious foods
- Exercise regularly
- Get enough sleep
- Meditate regularly
What actions do I need to take to support those values?
You know what is required so which actions do you need to take to make it happen. Make a list of tangible actions that you can do.
For health:
- Join a gym
- Get a personal trainer
- Find a friend to train with
- Find a local market for fresh organic produce
- Establish morning and evening routines
What actions and behaviours do not support this value
Now you know what actions to take, write down a list of things that do no support your value and actions to avoid as much as possible.
For health:
- Alcohol
- Junk food
- Sweets, cakes, and candy
- Late-night Netflix binging
- Sleeping till noon on weekends
Do one thing per day that supports your value
Look at your support strategies and your list of actions to take. Are you currently doing them? If not, choose one thing you want to start working on and do one action per day.
For health, perhaps step one is joining a gym. The next step is to get a trainer. And the third step is to establish a regular training schedule, both with your trainer and on your own. Once each step and action has been established, move on to the next and keep working on it.
Work through the above steps for each of your five (or less) values until you live by them. It may be a long process of hard work. However, it will allow you to live up to your true self and highest potential.
Of course, there will be days where things don’t go as planned, and that’s okay. What matters is that you are clear on your core values, and you do your very best to live up to them daily. You will feel much more fulfilled for it.
