How to Eliminate Self-Created Obstacles

And launch yourself toward your goals

Here is a simple idea to help you become more focused, action-oriented, and more likely to achieve your goals. There are obstacles some of us tend to create for ourselves without even recognizing it. And it limit’s us from reaching our potential. Here is how you can eliminate the obstacles you created for yourself, and overcome them.

Unconscious Limits

Forget about “true ability” for a moment as we look at a scenario. Take two people of equal ability and skill with most factors equal. Say they have similar backgrounds, went to similar schools, had similar upbringings. And you happen to give them a challenge. One says “yes I can!” The other says “no I can’t!”

At this point, whether they truly can accomplish a given task is not the point. It doesn’t matter. The important thing is to notice the obvious difference. The biggest difference between these two people is one person said “they can” and the other said “they can’t.” One believes they can succeed, the other does not. This simple shift is all in their minds based on the imaginary situation.

And self-created obstacles like these can get us to lose focus on what is important. We become distracted. We might even accidentally bring about the things we wish to avoid. For example, say someone is upset about bad relationships and does not want another bad relationship. But somehow they end up with another bad relationship.

Let’s reacquaint ourselves with an idea you’ve probably heard before. And I’ll include methods to help you manage your thoughts more effectively. Let’s look at the concept of the Law of Attraction again. And then think about how we can apply it while shifting our mindset.

The Law of Attraction is brought up by many personal development and success speakers. And it is often misunderstood. You probably heard about on television, from personal development experts, in articles, and more.

Yet part of you might choose to ignore the concept. Or you tried to put it into action a couple times and “it didn’t work.” So let’s simplify it real quick.

It is simple, and it is this:

Focus Your Energies On Things You Want

You could expand that to say “focus your energies on the things you want in your life, not on the things you DO NOT want.”

It is so simple yet it can be very difficult to implement because we tend to focus on what we DO NOT want as a reflex.

If we live in a densely populated city we might say:

“I do not want to get stuck in traffic,” or “I hope I do not see a rat today” or “I do not want to deal with a rude barista, driver, or customer service representative today.”

If we are building a business we might say:

“I do not want to hear about that idea anymore,” or “I do not want to work with that person anymore,” or “I do not want the economy to make a drastic shift over the next three quarters.”

It becomes so easy to try and “avoid” the things that we do not want, that we get distracted from going for the things we do want. We naturally believe thinking about what we do not want is also thinking about what we want. But that is far from the truth. Because in those scenarios, what a person really wants is possibly more along the lines of:

• More time to spend with family at the end of a long workday
• To live in a clean city
• To meet some nice and interesting people who make you smile
• To have your own idea heard
• Understanding why the other person is the way they are
• Make the money you planned on making

And now you can see the difference between thinking about what you want vs not want. So let’s talk about the topic of…

Motivation

Are you the type of person who works harder to avoid pain than to gain pleasure? Or phrased another way, are you a person who puts more effort to avoid losing or are you a person who puts more effort into winning?

The concept of motivation is that simple. It is the feeling of a desire for something, or it is an avoidance of something. It doesn’t mean you will get it, and it doesn’t mean you will avoid something.

And it is a magical word that will help you understand who you are, better. And with that self-knowledge, you can take yourself very far.

So let’s apply this to the concept of focusing on what you want. When you first hear this concept of focusing on what you want, you could have negative thoughts such as:

• “Not another person who is going to tell me that things will start happening as soon as I start visualizing the things I want.”
• “I ‘want money’ but money has not fallen into anyone’s lap just by thinking about it. And these are the same people saying that I have to give something of value to get something of value in return, so HAHA! The logic of this concept is wrong!”
• “I want to meet the man/woman of my dreams who is way out of my league, and they would never date me.”
• “Not working with a person is what I want! How do you explain that?”

Or in business:

• “I forecast some business obstacles, and I do not want them to happen, so should I just not think about them?”

What you can notice with all of those scenarios, is that there are slivers of doubt. And those doubts also prevent the Law of Attraction from working its’ magic.

Plus it is an ineffective, costly way of thinking. Both to your mind and life.

It is known that the human brain is not effective at multi-tasking. In fact, science has shown that “true multitasking” is impossible. And attempts to do so can cause unnecessary stress. Limiting the number of tasks a person must accomplish in the workplace is a very important concept in business as well. Because experts know how ineffective multi-tasking is compared to having groups or individuals focusing on specific activities.

This brain science is also true for trying to think about what we want and what we do not want at the same time. Getting what we want and avoiding what we do not want are two different and opposing actions.

What do you want to focus your energy on?

When you walk around bare feet on a hot summer day at the beach, do you focus on “not wanting to burn your feet” or are you thinking “ouch, ouch, ouch, I should have brought my shoes over, I want to get somewhere, so my feet feel better?”

Or have you ever “not wanted” something so bad, that it eventually came to you despite all the focused effort to avoid it? A meeting with a boss, a rival getting a promotion or client over you, or dropping your phone?

When you think about what you do not want to happen, those things tend to happen. Not because there is some mystical force that makes it appear. But because you are focusing on it. Whereas, if you focus on something you want to happen, you are more likely to achieve it.

Choosing the Right Activities

Here’s another reason why thinking of what we do not want is ineffective. By focusing on what we do not want, we are therefore focusing on what we do not want. Simply saying “not” does not automatically eliminate it from physical possibility or your mind. In fact, it does very little, and actually puts the idea into your mind. The word “not” is a very weak word.

For example, if I say “do not think of a red Jell-O filled Olympic sized pool” what do you think of?

On top of that, bad ideas come when you start to think of things you do not want. You can lose focus on what’s important. You get distracted by the things that are having a negative effect on your life.

Once you start focusing on things you want, your focus and energies will work toward that direction. You will recognize those things that are bringing your wants into your life as opposed to the things that sap your energy.

And if you have trouble with this concept, here is a simple solution.

Focusing Your Energy On What You Want

Here is a bonus step you can take: read the book or watch the movie The Secret by Rhonda Byrne for more in-depth stories about the idea in this article.

But let’s look at a system that will help you get started on changing your life.

First, you must recognize exactly what it is you want, and start taking action toward it. Even if it is as simple as “sitting on the idea” and jotting it in a notebook. Focusing on what you want does not mean sitting around and waiting for it to come to you. It means focusing your energy which means actions or thought toward attaining what you want.

Next, if you’re still skeptical, might have a thought along the lines of “well I want 100 million dollars in my bank tomorrow afternoon.” Or “I want new leadership in my company, country, or organization.” And then you wake up tomorrow, a month, or even a couple years from now and notice that what you wanted so badly has not occurred.

The simple answer is most effective in the form of a question. If you wanted it that bad, what actions did you take to get it? Did you come up with a viable business plan that could help a company grow $10billion? Did you vote and work volunteer on a political campaign?

Focus means applying your energies and activities toward a specific desire.

Third, thinking about and working towards the things we want does not automatically eliminate obstacles from our life.

Earlier we talked about two types of motivations: desire for something, and the avoidance of an event. Even if you are the type of person tends to focus more energy toward “avoiding loss” than “winning,” here is a solution. This is a valuable solution because as soon as you start focusing on “avoiding loss” you could inadvertently halt your momentum.

As soon as you start thinking about every obstacle that “could” come up, or every negative scenario, you could slow down your progress. Because your “avoidance” of something can completely overwhelm your actions and desires to “win.”

How can you work towards achieving your fullest potential, while “avoiding” obstacles? Here are two ways

Go After What You Want and Work Obstacles as They Come

This is relevant to business where there may be other stakeholders as well. Another way of saying it for “corporate” is “plan contingencies for challenges that COULD arise. And continue working towards what you want for your business.” Because your goal is to make business go smooth and to prosper.

And right now, as a natural skeptic myself, I would raise the point “WAIT STOP RIGHT THERE! YOU JUST TOLD ME TO FOCUS ON WHAT I WANT NOT WHAT I DON’T WANT, BUT NOW YOU’RE TELLING ME TO PLAN FOR WHAT I DON’T WANT! I’M DONE, I’M THROUGH, YOU JUST CONTRADICTED YOURSELF.”

What was said was “plan contingencies for challenges that COULD arise. And continue working towards what you want for your business.”

There is a major difference between thinking:

“I do not want this bad thing to happen yet I also want to do this other good thing.”

And…

“I want this good thing to happen. I also want to understand what challenges might come up. So here is a brief plan a and plan b to have ready so that I can make this plan go as smoothly as possible.”

And now you have one magnificent method to help you focus your actions effectively toward what you want to achieve.

Best Wishes,

Emmett

P.S. If you find this article helpful, find more exclusive ideas by checking out The Ideator Journal.