How To Do Things You Don’t Want To Do
Strategies to help you stop putting things off and start achieving rather than dreaming.
Growth happens in uncomfortable seasons.
Anything worthwhile will require you to do things you don’t want to do. If you want to lose weight, you’re going to have to go through an uncomfortable period of time where you’re exercising more than usual and eating less. If you want to build a business, you’re going to have to go through a period of time where you’re essentially working for free, staying up late, working away without knowing whether or not it’ll all work out.
No matter what you’re going to want to accomplish in life, it will involve some level of discomfort. And the majority of the time, that level of discomfort will try to prevent you from doing the things that need to be done unless you’re disciplined enough to push through.
The good news is that there are a few strategies that you can utilize that will help you do the things you don’t necessarily want to do in order to get to where you want to be.
With that being said, here are a few that have worked for me and allowed me to reach my goals.
You’re Not Your Thoughts.
If a thought tells you you’re tired, what do you typically do?
Take a break? Relax? Turn on the TV? I usually scroll through social media. For whatever reason, it’s my way of taking a break. However, I started realizing something sort of odd. Every morning, around 6–7 am, when I sat down to start working, my mind would whisper, “I’m tired.”
Even after a full night of quality sleep, even after a cup of coffee — or even two, my mind would tell me — “I’m tired”, and I’d reach over to my phone and start mindlessly scrolling.
I once read that your mind is merely a suggestion box, and you have the power to veto any thought or impulse. Our brains are highly influenced by cognitive biases, and while we might think we view the world objectively, we’re always thinking subjectively.
When you sit down to accomplish a task, your mind tries to help you and serve you in your best interest. For instance, it might tell you you’re tired and that you should relax and take a break. However, that type of suggestion isn’t always helpful.
It’s easy to believe that every thought that pops up in your head is an accurate assessment of reality, and you should act accordingly; however, if you constantly do that, you will never get anything done.
Instead, you should view your thoughts purely as suggestions; it puts you in an empowering position for making better and more productive decisions.
For example, every morning, when I sit down to write, I start thinking about how tired I am. How I should quit writing because what I have to say isn’t even that valuable, but now I know that this is just my brain getting anxious. Instead of viewing these thoughts as objective truth, I give them the same attention I would give any other suggestion.
I bypass it and keep going. Consider this, what positive changes would you start seeing in your life if you started thinking of your thoughts as mere suggestions rather than absolute truths?
How much would you accomplish if you started relying on your discipline and good habits rather than temporary thoughts and feelings?
In an article written for PsychCentral, psychotherapist Stacey Kuhl Wochner says,
It’s all about being aware that the intrusive, scary thoughts are merely unsubstantial puffs of nothingness that we should learn to blow off, and that our intentional, positive thoughts can help shape our behaviors in productive ways. In conclusion, you are not your thoughts; you are the sum of so much more, including your intent and, more importantly, action.
Identify How You Perceive Discomfort.
Your beliefs will always determine your response.
For example, I used to believe that the moment I felt discomfort within something I was doing, it was a sign for me to stop. In middle school, I picked up kickboxing. It was one of the hardest things I’d ever done, I was never one for sports, and I hated having someone tell me I had to run laps around the building. I was uncomfortable. I was stretching myself in ways I never had before, and I still, to this day, remember thinking I should quit.
And quit I did, because the more I did it, the harder the training was. Instead of pursuing a sport that brought me genuine joy, I gave in to my discomfort and thoughts and decided that maybe my mind was right. I should give it up. It was really hard.
Nowadays, the moment I experience discomfort — I don’t quit. I know that discomfort is just an opportunity for me to stretch my mental and physical resistance.
I used to perceive discomfort as a sign to give up — now I look at it as the universe challenging me and asking, “do you have what it takes?”
Learn to Exercise Your Willpower.
Willpower is like a muscle; the more you exercise it, the stronger it gets.
For example, the more you do something that others dread doing, the easier it gets for you. This level of self-control is what’s needed in order to create extraordinary results.
The best way to practice mental resistance is through voluntary hardships. It’s by doing the things nobody else wants to do. It’s by going to the gym every morning at 5 am when the world is still asleep. It’s by running 3 miles when you can barely run 1. It’s by forcing yourself to read that self-help book even though you’d rather do absolutely anything else.
I like to practice on a daily basis. For example, throughout the week I wake up at 5 am on the dot. It doesn’t matter if I went to bed late, if I said I’m going to do it, I stick to my word. I write every morning — it doesn’t matter if I don’t feel inspired, or if I don’t have anything to say. I do it.
I workout at minimum 5 times a week. I don’t care if I’m tired or not “feeling” it. I do it. No excuses.
Start small, and stretch yourself a little bit more every day.
How to Do Things You Don’t Want to Do.
You are in the driver’s seat. You have the ability to say no and to say yes. When your mind tells you that you can’t do something, instead of listening to it and taking it as literal truth — stretch yourself. Go against your usual instincts.
If you learn to take action despite what your mind tells you, then you can finally perceive discomfort as mental resistance training, and each time you push through the resistance, you’ll notice yourself getting stronger.
With time, it’ll become second nature for you to do the things you don’t want to do, and that’s when your goals will start becoming your reality.
Doing things we don’t want to do is hard. I won’t lie, sometimes I feel like I’m going to war with myself.
However, if you’re like me, goal-driven, and ready to accept the grand opportunities that life has to offer, you need to train yourself to like hard things. That is what will set you apart from the rest of the crowd. That is what will set you apart from the people who dream about success, and the people who achieve success.
It won’t be easy, but it’ll be well worth it.