How to Dismantle the Triggers That Spark Hatred
It only takes a tiny tool to render a physical weapon useless. We would all do well to find tools for the emotional ones as well
If your emotional autopilot seems to jolt you off course with every passing wind of disagreement, then it’s time to fire that worthless bastard and upgrade your operating system.
There has been a gradual corrosion of societal morality for quite some time now and reasons for explosive division are being handed out like opinions at a, “how to be a narcissist”, convention.
if your actions are fueled by hatred, & then try to make your cause known to an individual or the public, you have already lost the battle for effective communication.
This IS what the point of end-game communicating is for, — to be effective, and being effective is resolving an issue that turns out best for everyone.
Otherwise, you’re just vomiting out the excess of your overly opinionated holding tank of pent-up anger.
Let’s face it, nothing has ever been or ever will be resolved by rallying together a march for (place REASON for injustice here) & venomously singling out a handful of (place CAUSE of injustice here), then lumping them all together into a collective whole to throw your verbal disputes at,… and then, expect to make any kind of change whatsoever,… if, in fact, your goal is to make a change for the better.
But don’t let me stop you,… if your goal is to make things worse for you and your opponents,… please, continue and let me know how that works out for ya.
(Sorry,… sarcastic humor is a default. Almost like the period at the end of a sentence) Get back on point Mr. B…
FACT — Hatred only causes more hatred —
Once you wedge hate into any situation, things are always going to deescalate rapidly into something worse.
So if you stand against racism, corruption, brutality, or any other injustice, — Awesome Sauce, — I’ll stand beside you but don’t expect me to jump in if you irrationally lump all whites, all blacks, all democrats, all republicans, all cops,… (you get the picture) into the melting pot of stereotypical bias's because you disagree or got burned by a handful of, said, reasons for your protest.
All the while, thinking you’re doing your part in the fight for injustice by donning the “anything but” justice cape and reaching for the “look at me” megaphone, without ever solving a dang thing.
Indeed, there isn’t a shortage of injustices by any means, that’s for sure, and there is a definite need for massive positive change in many areas of life. I just ask that first, before you pride yourself as the champion of a cause, make sure it’s not a death by lighting yourself on fire show, to somehow prove that life is worth living. It doesn’t make any sense.
Okay,… How do we remedy this dilemma?
1. Recognize Worthless & Counterproductive Actions
As mentioned earlier, hate breeds more hate — anger, more anger — arguing, arguing, — name-calling— Blah blah blah, breeds more Blah blah blah…
(Now was that last one necessary? Probably not)
Translation: If what you’re doing is creating more of what you’re doing, — and what you’re doing is trying to fight against those who are doing what you yourself are doing… STOP!… No Really,… STOP!… Immediately!
(Play with that light switch as many times as it takes for that bulb to stay on).
You can not be effective in stomping out hatred if you try to stomp it out by using hatred.
It’s like trying to drown a fish, you might be putting all your efforts into it but you’re only exhausting yourself in a pointless process…
(and… the fish just gets more annoyed at every attempt you try to keep him from his daily recommended allowance of plankton).
2. Drill Down to the Root Cause of Any Injustice
I’ve got one word for you…
- Control
(Well, that was the shortest list in history)
Take stress, irritation, worry, discouragement, revenge, rage, jealousy, and every other word that explains anything negative, evil, or wrong,
(which could, in contrast, be the longest list in history)
chuck’em all in a fully stoked crucible and what you’ll pour into the awaiting mold is, none other than, Control.
(All dressed up with a little pink bow & slip-in shoulder pads for added effect)
Side Notes: This topic of control alone will eventually be an entire article in itself but if I could explain control in a short visual, it would be a single standing tree. All of those examples in the list above would be the branches and control would be the tree trunk. Cut the tree down at the base of the trunk and all the branches come down with it.
Drilling down even further into the root system,… again, that’s even another separate topic called the ego.
(That sawed-off little ground tick that burrows itself into your inner thigh of daily routine, undetected until it’s big enough to be the next nuisance to twist and pull)
3. Fight the Injustice itself, Not the need to be Right
The problem here, caused by control, is hatred —notice I didn’t say anger — It’s perfectly fine to be angry at injustices, and as a matter of fact, there would be something wrong with you if you weren’t angry to some degree. Just don’t let it fester into hatred,… there is a huge difference.
Use anger to fuel change for the better — but fighting racism with racism will cause more racism, fighting violence with violence will cause more violence, and so on. It doesn’t matter if it’s physical or verbal.
These are the unfortunate outcomes of wanting to be right at the expense of resolution.
- If you want to be right, you will do whatever you can to “win” the cause for your own personal glory.
- If you want to resolve an issue, you will do whatever it takes to dismantle the cause for the greater good of everyone involved.
I will end on a few more little tips:
Most disagreements are about the smaller petty issues in the differences that cause division, so focus more on the similarities and work together for the sake of unity. Compromise,… and if you can’t find the middle ground,… try again until you do. It is perfectly fine to disagree on any topic,… it is not, however, ok to display your hatred towards someone else that doesn’t hold the same values as you.
And honestly, using hate to combat hate is like slapping a water buffalo with the intention to make him a pet.
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Much Love. Rick