How to Delete Your Medium Account in Three Simple Steps

Summary

The article provides a satirical guide on how to delete a Medium account by leveraging the platform's engagement dynamics to maximize readership and impact before leaving.

Abstract

The guide, titled "How to Delete Your Medium Account in Three Simple Steps," humorously outlines a method for departing from Medium that involves writing a heartfelt goodbye article to engage followers, capitalizing on the subsequent engagement to boost one's content visibility, and then choosing not to delete the account to continue benefiting from the platform's community and potential earnings. It suggests that by writing an emotionally charged farewell piece, a writer can trigger a surge of reader responses and nostalgic interactions, leading to increased visibility and engagement. The article implies that the transient nature of content on Medium, with millions of posts published daily, makes it easy for writers to re-engage their audience after a hiatus, and it cheekily encourages readers to use the author's referral link if they decide to join Medium.

Opinions

The author expresses skepticism about why someone would want to delete their Medium account, given the potential for earning and building relationships.
There is a playful suggestion that readers are sentimental and forgetful, quickly moving on from a writer's departure only to re-engage if the writer decides to stay or return.
The article takes a tongue-in-cheek approach to the idea of leaving Medium, implying that the platform owes writers engagement and that writers can manipulate this expectation to their advantage.
The author seems to critique the nature of content consumption on the internet, where even significant announcements like an author's departure are soon forgotten amidst the constant stream of new content.
By encouraging the use of their referral link, the author indicates that there is a financial incentive for writers to maintain their presence on Medium, despite any publicized intentions to leave.

Step #1 — Write an article about deleting your Medium account

It’s not easy to write this article because you need to put emotions in it.

Make your readers cry.

Make your followers comment that they love you, miss you already, and want you to stay forever. Don’t worry; they’re just acting like children. And, like children, they will have forgotten about it two days (minutes) later.

If you need an example, read the article of my (formerly) good writer friend Sarah Cords.

Even more engagement

Optionally, write an article about this bump in the statistics. Say something like, yeah, sure, I know I said bye-bye, but I have to add a post scriptum.

Optionally #2, add a post-post-scriptum.

Optionally #3, you get the drill.

If you need an example, read this other article of my (formerly) good writer friend Sarah Cords. She didn’t write the post post scriptum yet, so, no model for you to follow. (Maybe in the future.)

Takeaway — post scriptum

I hear some of you saying something along the line, Tsss, that’s horseshit, readers won’t fall for that.

Haha! Not true. I think you forgot that 20,000+ articles are published every day on Medium only. And did I mention the 7.5 MILLION blog posts published every day?

So, trust me when I say this, nothing is more forgotten than the article you wrote a month ago.

Now that you deleted your Medium account. Your readers face a tricky question: whose referral link to use then? I’m here to help.

(Use this link to become a Medium member. It’s the same price for you, but there’s a commission for me to keep on writing funny stories for you!)

How to Delete Your Medium Account in Three Simple Steps

Not sure why you would want to do that, but, your choice.

Step #1 — Write an article about deleting your Medium account

Step #2 — Experience more engagement than you ever had on the platform

Even more engagement

Step #3 — Don’t delete your account and reap the benefits

Examples of titles you can use:

Takeaway — post scriptum

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