How to Calm Down and Stop Your Mind From Spiraling

Stop your negative thinking before it gets out of hand.

We’re living through stressful times. Some of us are sick, others are experiencing financial troubles, and most of us are on lockdown for an unknown amount of time.

Anxiety and fear make us vulnerable to negative thinking. One corrupt thought can quickly transform into a spiral of pessimism.

The worst part about negativity is how comfortable it feels. It doesn’t feel good — quite the opposite — but it’s safe. Feeling bad is the excuse we need to binge-watch and ignore life’s reality.

Positivity feels better, but it requires more work. We still have to face our reality, and that can be difficult. But it beats the alternative.

When you succumb to negativity, the scarier thoughts invade. You want to avoid that during times of crisis. You’ll end up spiraling if you don’t.

You don’t have to let your negative thoughts take control. One wicked thought doesn’t have to turn into a bad feeling you walk around with like an evil shadow.

It might not feel like it, but you’re in control of your thoughts. You can’t stop them when they initially come, but you can prevent them from going any further.

You can expand on a positive feeling and choose to ignore a bad one.

You Think, Then You Feel

Thoughts precede feeling. If you want to stop yourself from feeling like the world is going to fall apart, then stop thinking the world is going to fall apart.

When you feel sad, you don’t flip a switch and suddenly become happy. It starts with a thought (e.g., a happy memory) or you surround yourself with people who make the bad thoughts go away. Then, you feel happy.

If you feel heavy with darkness, it’s because your mind is consumed by it. You need to figure out why. A negative thought has to start somewhere.

My negative thoughts usually stem from a lack of money. Your problem may be that you watch the news too often or you surround yourself with the wrong kind of people.

Some negative thoughts have easy solutions: Watch the news less and spend less time with cruel people.

Some problems — such as financial issues or a virus — don’t have resolutions. What do you do where there’s no solution to your problem?

You choose to see the bright side.

I faced this challenge a couple of weeks ago. While I couldn’t solve my predicament, I was able to change my thoughts around it.

What Can You Control?

My family has struggled financially for over a decade. We’ve experienced highs and lows.

A couple of weeks ago, I was worrying because we were running out of lotion. The lotion we use is five dollars, and no one had money.

For those of you who’ve never struggled with money, this might sound ludicrous. When you’ve worried about money as much as I have, any small item can cause stress.

That little thought of, “We’ve run out of lotion,” turned into, “How will we make money?” I thought about the lockdown and how we wouldn’t be able to afford food or any basic necessities.

The negative thoughts became so loud that I wanted to cower away as if it were a monster standing in front of me. I was spiraling.

I can’t solve our financial problems easily. There’s no quick call to make or a button to push.

There was only one thing I could control: my thoughts.

How to Control Your Negative Thoughts

You can’t stop a negative thought from entering your mind, but you can put up a barricade to prevent the rest that inevitably follows from taking control.

It’s easy to let the negative thoughts take over. As I said, despite how terrible they feel, they’re easy to succumb to. You might find that you don’t want to stop them.

You have to fight that. You have to remember that negative thinking won’t solve any of your problems. Feeling like shit won’t fix your situation.

Think about the consequences. You might sit on the couch and binge-watch Netflix to escape a reality that isn’t even real.

You don’t want to do that. You want to be okay.

Once you’ve convinced yourself that negative thinking sucks, the best way to stop thinking negatively is to remember the present moment. If you focus on some scary future (which could be unlikely), you’re going to start ruminating.

Our imagination can feel real. Daydreaming feels like you’re in another place and time, and the emotion is powerful.

You have to pull yourself out. Remember where you are at that very moment. Right now, you’re okay. You’re healthy. You have money. You have food.

If you can stop your negative thought and realize that you’re okay right now, you’ll stop the thoughts from spiraling.

Your Mind Likes to Exaggerate

Not everything you think is true. Let’s take the current situation we’re all living through right now.

It could be easy to think that you might get the coronavirus. That thought could transition into fear and worrying about whether or not you’re going to die.

Our minds like to take things too far (even when we think positive thoughts). You have to learn to examine what is true right now: You don’t have the virus, and you’re healthy.

A negative thought usually starts with a simple concern. It can quickly turn into worries that make you forget what’s real and what isn’t.

You end up worrying about COVID-19 when you don’t even have a cough.

That’s why, no matter how grave the situation, you have to hold onto the truth of the moment. Understand you’re okay.

Think Happy Thoughts

Once you’ve come back to reality, think happy thoughts. By that, I mean, remind yourself about what’s going well.

Positive self-talk is proven to reduce stress and boost your overall life satisfaction.

Just as a negative thought can make you feel like the world is ending, a positive thought can remind you of all the possibilities available to you.

Positive thinking is as simple as flipping your negative thought.

While I was having my financial-struggle-breakdown, I flipped my words and said this: “I trust that everything is going to be okay. I choose love and abundance over fear. We have plenty of money. It’s overflowing.”

Negative thoughts are powerful. Believe that your positive thinking can be just as strong.

I Promise You’re Going to Be Okay

Do you know what humans are exceptional at? Finding solutions and overcoming obstacles.

Somehow, someway, we always figure out a way through our problems. We find a way to be okay. We ask for help and get it. Even out-of-the-blue solutions can surface (like finding twenty bucks in your pocket).

That’s how I know you’re going to be okay.

That’s how I know I’m going to be okay. My family and I have had days where we eat the same meal three times in a row, but not once have we gone without food.

Even when everything has been at it’s worst, you’ve found a way to overcome it. Trust that you can overcome this, too. Start with your thoughts.