How To Be Sort Of Good At Something

My journey out of suck.

A very wise dog* once said:

“Dude, sucking at something is the first step towards being sort of good at something.”

The first time I heard this, my mind was pretty well blown. I mean… how true is that?

And it also struck me how this is the perfect advice to give anyone who wants to learn something challenging like music, art, a foreign language, computer programming, and so forth.

I knew this because it was something I discovered on my own many years ago but had never really put into words — at least not as well as a shape-changing dog.

I’m in my 50s. This means I’ve had the chance to learn a lot of new things, and because I love to learn new things, it’s a chance I’ve taken advantage of repeatedly. I’m happy to say I’ve had more successes than failures.

Because I learned how not to be afraid of sucking at something.

My stupid days

When I was younger and cared way more than was healthy about what other people might think of me, I wanted to be a lot of things. An artist and a musician were two of the top things.

The problem was that I wasn’t very good at either. My drawings of people all looked flat and out of proportion. My attempts at the guitar and the banjo alienated my roommates. I was told by multiple people that I’d never be a good artist. Despite how much I practiced, I would never improve.

Likewise, I was actively encouraged to give up on music. I may enjoy music a lot, but it just wasn’t in me to play it.

And, like a fool, I believed everyone. I put the sketchpads away. I returned the borrowed guitar and put the garage sale-banjo deep into the back of my closet.

After that, I pretty much didn’t do anything except wish it had been otherwise.

Then I got a little smarter

Then, when I hit 30, something interesting happened. I’m not sure what brought it about, but I suddenly stopped caring so much about what others thought of me. Perhaps by 30, I decided I didn’t have anything to prove. I survived my 20s, and, therefore, everything was going to be all right now matter what I did.

Whatever the reason, I found the urge to draw, paint, and play music grow again. I had enough of a disposable income to purchase supplies and buy a halfway decent no-brand guitar. I no longer had roommates, and I didn’t have a girlfriend at the time to tell me how much I sucked at either art or music.

And I just did.

Oh, those early sketchbooks were still pretty awful. But without discouragement from others and without worrying about how it looked, I embraced my suckiness and just kept at it. As for the music, I played the opening to “Ode To Joy” and “Smoke on the Water” over and over and over and over again.

It was awful. It really sucked.

But over time (and by time, I mean a couple of years of just doing this for fun and for myself alone), I sort of got good.

Not brilliant. Not really talented.

But sort of good.

Forward momentum

I joined a live-drawing group that met every other week, and while my work wasn’t the best, it wasn’t the worst. I started going to the local Irish music open session and sat in the corner with a mandolin and quietly played along with the tunes I knew. Over time, I played a bit louder. I learned more songs. I became more involved.

After a couple of more years, I was selling paintings at art festivals. I even sold a few illustrations as cover art. My local musician friends invited me to play as part of a group recording for a local charity CD. I even got paid to lead a few sessions at a new pub. I had players newer than me (and more terrible than me) to encourage and guide.

Spending some time sucking at something eventually allowed me to become sort of good at something.

You’re not going to see me on the cover of Art News. You’re not going to see me accepting a Grammy. But I enjoy what I do, became sort of good at it, and have been enjoying myself and my life a whole lot more.

All because I accepted I would suck at something for a while before I got sort of good at it.

The same philosophy has helped me go on to do a bunch of other interesting things. I used to suck at speaking Japanese. Then I became sort of good at it — enough to be on the board of the local Japan-US Cultural Committee where the primary language spoken wasn’t English.

I used to be a pretty terrible writer. I make an actual living at it now. Pays my mortgage and everything.

I won’t say I’m one of the greats. But I don’t suck.

I’m sort of good.

The lesson to take away

There’s a list of skills I’ve managed to pick up following this pattern.

There’s no reason why you can’t adopt this same pattern to how you approach those things you suck at.

Accept that you’re going to suck, and that’s okay. Because sucking at something is the first step towards becoming sort of good at something.

And you will get sort of good.

Who knows? Maybe you’ll find you’ll become much more than sort of good, but really good.

Wouldn’t that be neat?

And wouldn’t you feel like a fool if you let that revelation slip by because you couldn’t get past the sucking stage?

Something to think about, friends.

*The wise dog in question is named Jake, and the line was spoken during the first season of the Cartoon Network show Adventure Time. Here’s your bonus lesson… you’re never too old for a good cartoon show.

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