How To Be ok, With not Fitting in With the ‘Normal’ Mainstream Mindset!

For those that have been feeling like a square peg in a round hole

There have always been those who feel like they are on the fringes of mainstream culture. Who feel like they don’t really fit into the mainstream mindset and are subsequently marginalized.

Things seem to have gotten even worse recently.

You may have noticed that the world has become increasingly obsessed with mainstream majority culture whilst paradoxically supporting minorities?

Yet, when those minority and alternative views are expressed and do not fit a certain narrative, they are viewed as wrong or extreme.

The new normal now appears to have come with a further set of restrictions on thinking as well as lifestyle. ‘If you think differently, then you must be against us’.

It makes it very difficult if your views are not aligned with the mainstream.

I believe there are now a lot more people who feel like they don’t fit into normal society as the mainstream parameters have narrowed even further.

It’s Nothing New

Mainstream society has always had a certain seduction to conform to a narrow set of defined parameters considered normal. There will be a set of mainstream norms that make up the status quo in every culture.

Falling outside of these perceived norms will often have you labeled as strange, an oddball, or worse.

I like how author Signe A. Dayhoff, Ph.D. puts it, ‘When you feel like you are diagonally parked in a parallel universe.’

I know from experience it is something people struggle with, especially when trying to navigate the workplace and business arena.

This is because the corporate world does not really set out to create people who can think. They mainly want to create robots who will simply follow, no matter what the situation.

This creates the need to either become an obvious rebel or for the more introverted like myself to withhold your true feelings.

A rebel in disguise!

However, the current trajectory of humankind is such that it is imperative for those with alternative views to speak out. Otherwise, we could be destined to become a robotic race that only pays lip service to alternatives when it suits the mainstream to do so.

Such as entertainment!!

You Can Embrace Your Difference

Despite what mainstream culture might say, it really is ok to not conform to it and be different.

I mean really embrace it, and don’t let anyone who seeks to conform and hence judge you, tell you anything different.

Let’s be loud and clear on this and say it with some conviction…….fuck them!

Fuck them all, because most have absolutely no idea what they are talking about, and no qualification to say anything. They are very often only regurgitating mainstream soundbites they didn’t even think of themselves.

It’s no surprise that the mainstream mentality is so centered around materialism, conformity, and compliance. These things do not require much thinking.

Don’t question just go along to get along.

Only the very privileged few get to showcase their difference and that is because it makes some people lot’s of money, and there we have it again. The mainstream culture of commercializing everything.

The irony is that some of those who do get to such lofty heights often started out being ridiculed and marginalized. It was only through perseverance, creative genius, and/or an undeniable following they broke through.

Then it became about money!

What About Being Different in Everyday Life Though?

Personally, I find trying to fit in and conforming to the mainstream mindset just doesn’t work for me. It doesn’t make me happy, I don’t feel authentic and it hasn’t brought me the kind of reward I thought it would years ago.

Not that I have been a failure either as I have enjoyed many successes along the way. I think I just wasted so many years trying to fit in when I should have just forged my own path regardless.

I felt like I was constantly swimming against the tide, in a kind of respectable denial for many years. Now I’m in a kind of respectful non-compliance! Metaphorically speaking of course.

Mindvalley’s Vishen Lakhiani describes in his book ‘The Code of The Extraordinary Mind’ that this self-driving force is being ‘unfuckwithable’.

What a thought….it’s in your face and empowering at the same time!

The idea of being true to who you are even if that means not fitting in. Don’t allow anyone or anything to knock you off your course, even when they do try to ‘fuck’ with you.

A healthy society is not one where everyone is the same, thinks the same, and acts the same, despite certain stakeholders’ attempts to engineer things that way.

We need diversity in thought as well as culture and ethnicity.

It’s hypocritical of Institutions to promote ethnic diversity and tolerance with one hand whilst shutting down alternative thought and speech with the other.

Being Humble.

Advocating a ‘fuck them’ attitude should not mean advocating arrogance or any kind of hatred or prejudice though.

We need to be wiser than that.

It is important to be humble and to know who you really are. As the Ancient Philosopher, Lao Tzu said…… ‘To know others is intelligence, but to know yourself is wisdom.’

That means don’t just be different for the sake of it. Know why you are different. Face yourself and your truth and express it in ways that contribute to others, whatever way that may be.

Be ok……with not fitting in with the normal mainstream mindset.

Thank You for reading and supporting independent writers here on Medium and in this Publication.

Read more about ‘The Everyday Person’s Guide to Enlightenment, Mindfulness and Streetwise Spirituality’ on my Medium profile DJ Hopkins and blog DJ Hopkins