How To Avoid the Hidden Traps of Modern Lifestyle

Small tweaks can help fix our misplaced priorities

I’ve had my parents and grandparents constantly tell me how their generations were much more content and happier than the generations of today.

There isn’t much to say in response to that claim because happiness isn’t something you can necessarily measure quite so simply. Nor can one generation make a claim that’s nearly impossible to verify given the constantly evolving nature of the world and the ever-changing definition of happiness and contentment.

Yet, if you do look around, as the world gets more advanced and technically our lives get longer — with increased life expectancies, there is probably some merit to the claim that we may be leaving longer lives, but they might be a lot emptier or discontent than our parents and grandparents. The symptoms are quite clear.

Dating options galore, but relationships are tumbling

According to Eurostat data, around 1.9 million marriages and an estimated 0.8 million divorces took place in the EU in 2017, according to the most recent data available for all EU Member States.

There is an abundance of apps and social media networks that are out there to help you find a date — and hence one is almost spoilt for choice. This ease of access and abundance often means there is less of an incentive to commit to a real relationship. Even when one commits, the necessary part of a successful relationship, i.e. adapting to each other’s nature and preferences becomes a challenge.

The easier option is to bail out and move on to the next person — hence the increasing rates of failure of relationships.

Most of us admire our parents’ long-lasting marriages but don’t want to understand and practice the effort that goes into such lifelong bonds.

Work-life balance on paper, more stress in reality

The very premise of flexible work arrangements lies in a better work-life balance. There is more talk and focus on workplace flexibility today than ever before. And the numbers say the same story — according to a study by Huberman & Minns, working hours today are much lower compared to a century ago, and the trend has been that of a constant decline over time.

Yet, 75% of employees believe the worker has more on-the-job stress than a generation ago, according to a study by Princeton Survey Research Associates.

Despite more flexibility for the average worker, there’s more competition, less job security, less “love-for-the-job” in today’s generations than their predecessors.

Healthcare advancements, yet declining quality of life

Healthcare has seen unprecedented advancements over the years, and today’s life expectancy is higher than ever before. The United Nations estimates a global average life expectancy of 72.6 years for 2019 — higher than in any country back in 1950.

Yet, mental health issues and depression rates in today’s youth are higher than ever before. According to data from the National Survey on Drug Use and Health, for youth, major depression increased 52 percent from 2005 to 2017 — from 8.7% to13.2%, and it rose 63% in young adults ages 18 to 25 from 2009 (8.1%) to 2017 (13.2%).

The increased stress that the modern lifestyle brings along with it is, unfortunately, outpacing the health benefits that come from technological advancements. Technology can improve the quantity, but not the quality of life.

More acquaintances, but less family and friends

We probably have the biggest of social networks — real or virtual, thanks to the increased emphasis on networking, both personally and professionally.

However real family ties and lifelong friendships are at crisis levels. In the pursuit for success, however we may define it, we leave behind the strongest of family ties and friendships — which are often the real wealth we must aim to accumulate.

According to UN population data, fertility rates have been at a constant decline, i.e., families aren’t a priority for today’s generations.

The cycle then continues — as we spend our lifetimes focused on more success, wealth accumulation, and other goals, our children (if any) then get into the same cycle as they grow up. As a result % of the older population living in Elder Care Homes has gone up over time.

We cut down forests for concrete jungles, and then yearn for nature’s retreats

Urban migration is a common phenomenon, where many people migrate from smaller cities or countrysides to metropolitan cities in search of better careers and job opportunities.

And then when the corporate burnout takes over, we look for respite in the lap of mother nature! 12 of the 22 most expensive vacations in the world mentioned are resorts built in secluded parts of the world surrounded by the beauty of nature.

Clearly, the human heart craves what it doesn’t have, and so we yearn for what we left behind at first anyway.

Is there a solution? Small steps can go a long way

Kaizen is the belief that small changes over time can create huge life changes.

Adjusting and evolving with your true partner

Finding true love is not about finding the perfect person. It is about accepting the imperfections, adjusting to each other’s personalities, and evolving into better versions of yourselves, together. Every successful relationship involves some mutual effort towards a common goal.

Do what you love or find a way to love what you do

Stress at work often comes from the fact that most of us don’t love what we do. It is often important to remember that the jobs that we all do aren’t necessarily to our liking, but they’re only a means to an end.

Keep your focus on the end goal, and don’t let the means bother you so much if the end goal is what you desire it to be.

Health should be a top priority

Your own body is the only thing that stays with you from the moment you’re born till you breathe your last. The quality of your life hugely depends on your state of health. Focus on your physical and mental health and do what it takes to keep it in good shape.

“It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.”

— Mahatma Gandhi

Keep in touch — It is your company that makes the journey worth it

Success tastes better when you have someone to share it with. We may all need to make certain sacrifices in terms of our priorities at various points in life. Make a conscious effort to stay in touch and close to the family and friends that matter. It often only takes a phone call, or an occasional meeting, to keep the relationships strong and fresh.

“You leave home to seek your fortune and when you get it you go home and share it with your family.”

— Anita Baker

Take a break and rejuvenate — every day

Find a hobby or something that helps you unplug and recharge your batteries every day. Whether it is yoga, working out, cooking or baking, spending time with family, playing a sport, reading a book, or anything else.

Also, try and find something that involves the outdoors and some fresh air to just help with that daily detox that we all need.

“We are surrounded by modern, time-saving devices, but we never seem to have enough time.”

— Barry Schwartz, The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less

These simple solutions can often be the difference between a meaningless, empty life and a really content and satisfying life. It is the journey of life that matters, the destination is all the same!