How To Appear Confident in 5 Simple Steps
Whether You’re At A Job Interview Or Socialising, Confidence Is Incredibly Important. Here Are 5 Practical Steps For A Confidence Boost In Minutes.
Introduction
Picture these 2 different scenes at a work presentation.
Scene 1: John
John strides up to the front of the room, his back straight, and a slight smile at the edge of his mouth. In front of his colleagues, he makes brief, friendly eye contact with everyone. His voice is clear and confident. He walks around the stage every so often, using gestures to emphasize points.
Scene 2: Ben
Ben’s shoulders are hunched and his are eyes downcast as he shuffles to the front of the room. His voice is hesitant and soft, his eyes wandering to the ceiling as he speaks.
These are 2 exaggerated examples which clearly show the difference in how confidence impacts both your presentation and the impression you leave behind.
We all strive to be John, but in many cases, we appear more like Ben.
What is Confidence?
There are many aspects to confidence. It isn’t just good posture and a loud voice. It is also about thinking confidently, feeling self-assured and believing in your abilities.
Some people are confident naturally. But what if you’re not?
Confidence can be learnt, practised and grown. Over time, anyone can become more confident. It’s time to say goodbye to insecurity and self-doubt.
Overview
- Positive Self-Talk
- Body Language
- Mindfulness
- Visualise success
- Practice
Positive Self-Talk
Half the game is in the mind. Trying to look confident, without being confident is much, much more difficult.
Negative thoughts that undermine your self-assurance would be like:
- If I make a mistake today, my life is going to be ruined!
- Everyone is more successful than me… I’ll never be that good.
Whenever you catch yourself thinking things like that, reframe them:
- I’ll give this my best shot, I’m ready to learn from any mistakes.
- I’ve put in the effort and work, I know I can do this!
These thoughts might only be in your mind, but they will likely translate into more confident body language.
Body Language
This is what people see. Is your back straight, or hunched? Are you fidgety or calm?
Here are the most important aspects of body language:
- Posture: Back Straight, Eyes Forward
- Eye Contact: Conveys Attentiveness & Severity
- Hand Gestures: Emphasises Words (not fidgeting)
- Smile: Conveys Friendliness & Self-Assurance
Remember, body language communicates a lot to your audience/ people around you. From this, they will judge and infer things about you.
Good body language will leave a favourable impression in others’ minds.
So, stand tall, your eyes looking straight, with a smile on your face. This not only makes you look more confident but also makes you feel more confident.
Mindfulness
Deep breath in… breath out.
Focus on what you are feeling. Don’t judge why, or how. Just acknowledge that you feel that way.
Look around you. Listen to the sounds. Pay attention to your breath, slowly breathing in, and slowly breathing out.
Wasn’t that calming?
This is mindfulness, where you focus on being aware(mindful) of yourself and things around you. It helps to clear your mind and calm you down. If you are in a stressful situation, try mindfulness to ease your nerves. When you are calmer, it is easier to be more confident.
Mindfulness can be practised anywhere, anytime. You can do it every morning, or whenever life is feeling hectic.
Slowing down and appreciating the little things and life does wonders to make you happier too!
Apps like Headspace help with guided meditation and mindfulness.
Practice
Next time you have to give a presentation or are at a social gathering, practice good posture, the 3 aspects of body language, or mindfulness. It’s not easy to make this many changes, so focus on one at first.
Seek feedback from your colleagues or friends. Ask them what you could do better, and improve for next time.
It can be difficult to become confident and break out of that shell of insecurity. Stepping out of your comfort zone and giving confidence your best shot takes courage. Believe in yourself, you can do it.
Remember, these concepts are useful in theory, but you have to practice them to reap the benefits.
The more you practice, the easier your confidence will become.
Visualise Success
Instead of imagining failing, or embarrassing yourself, visualise yourself succeeding.
Close your eyes and see yourself achieving your goals, delivering a powerful message in your presentation or confidently entering a job interview.
Feel the joy of that imaginary success, and have the drive to make it a reality.
Conclusion
Confidence is a journey. Becoming confident isn’t easy, and it takes time. Step by step, you’ll progress towards becoming more confident.
You’ve got this!
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