How Time-Wasting is Holding You Back

5 ways in which people accept that waiting is part of life (and how they’re wrong).

During the pandemic lockdown, there was a queue system put in place at the supermarket near us to avoid over-crowding and stockpiling. But I had been trying to do all my shopping online mostly to avoid the hassle and to stay as safe as possible.

There was one time, however, we just couldn’t avoid it. It was essential. My husband came with me to help carry everything. It was hot and muggy. When he saw the length of the queue as we drove into the car park he sighed and immediately asked if we could just go home. He did not want to be waiting in line for goodness knows how long in the terrible humid heat.

I dragged him to the queue anyway. I reassured him it would be a short wait, that it was deceivingly long because of the distance everyone had to keep in between each other.

After a few minutes went by and we didn’t move forward at all, he asked again if we could leave or he would call a taxi home and let me do the shopping alone.

I argued that we were there already and to just wait it out, through gritted teeth.

He was clearly irritated so I said, “whatever”, to call a taxi. He told me he was literally losing money because he would normally be paid an X amount hourly, and instead, his time was being used to wait in line. I was becoming increasingly angry too, thinking to myself, “just wait! You decided to come here!”

I felt humiliated too because I was sure the people queueing behind us could hear our disagreement. It was just unpleasant when it needn’t be.

Thirty awkward and silent minutes later we were in the supermarket and the rest of the trip was fine. All was forgotten and as well as all the shopping we needed my son gained a ball-pit for his bedroom. Happiness was restored all-round.

Waiting is a Societally Accepted Life Injustice

Now, the way my husband handled things is questionable, but I appreciate that he was trying to save time. He meant that he was literally losing money and while he could have been more tactful about it since it wasn’t my fault, he was thinking objectively — as he does when he’s faced with problems.

The queue was long, the heat was heavy, and the time spent waiting in line could have arguably been more costly in time and money than what we gained by doing the shop then, vs going back another time when the queue was shorter.

His annoyance was a reaction to the violation of being made to wait by the outside world, and then, by his wife who insisted on accepting this violation.

What do I always talk about though? Silver linings.

Tim Denning inspired the idea for this article in his story, Do These Things That Require Zero Talent to Improve Every Area of Your Life. He brought up the subject of saving time and how important it is to manage it well.

Waiting for anything is one of the most annoying things in the world. To me, to my husband, to everyone.

But very few people think they can do anything to change their behaviour or actions to repel from it or avoid it altogether.

5 Unnecessary but Normal Time-Wasting Occurrences:

• Being on hold to a service provider.
• Waiting for your pay-check so you can buy X, Y, or Z.
• A delayed journey.
• Waiting to pay the bill at a restaurant.
• A scheduled appointment that starts late.

Although it is widely disliked, many people have accepted that waiting is a period of time that’s beyond your control and it is, therefore, accepted.

I would go one step further than most by over acknowledging out loud my irritated state every time I had to wait for anything, which was useless. I’d complain to whoever I felt was responsible for the legal crime, and feel betrayed that it was allowed for exterior forces of the world to take control of my watch.

And how is this time-wasting covered up, accepted, brushed under the carpet?

“Just be patient!”

“It’s coming, just wait.”

*Twiddles thumbs.*

My husband had the answer all along as he does with many things (shh, don’t tell him I said this).

He acts where possible. He changes the situation so he doesn’t wait, and looks impolite or obnoxious to the outside world when actually, he’s just a smart-ass (and nobody likes a smart-ass (except me, secretly)).

Turn Time-Wasting Into an Opportunity

Rather than let that time be taken from you, get excited about this chance to use this unexpected free time to do other things.

Read, take notes, occupy your mind while you’re waiting on the phone or for at an appointment, or tackle some physical chores while you leave the call on speaker.

Anticipate a delayed journey and take snacks plus things to do to occupy your mind.

Budget for “a rainy day” or “miscellaneous” in your salary so you can do things before the next payday (and save it if it’s not used).

Go to the restaurant till to pay instead of waiting for the bill to arrive if you’re in a hurry to leave.

You don’t have to let your time be wasted. Waiting is a life injustice people just accept because:

1. People don’t treat time as a gift. They freely give it away because they don’t know they can choose not to. They designate time to be wasted if they need to make an important phone call or have a doctor’s appointment. They don’t realise they could use that time in conjunction with other important but time-consuming tasks.

2. People underestimate how much time is wasted. We don’t realise how much time we give away just like that. A few minutes here and there add up, just like pennies. It is ok if we are choosing to give that time away, but only while knowing it could, if we wanted, avoid it.

Conclusion

It is a relief to me to see time as a gift. It’s much more precious than we can ever imagine. Along with our mind, we are given time to use as we please.

And I believe this is one of many differences between those who are successful and those who aren’t.

Non-successful people’s time is loosely controlled and randomly taken.

Successful people’s time is theirs to spend in whichever ways they like.

You choose who you want to be.

Sylvia Emokpae, philosopher and thinker, writes passionately about motherhood, self-love, and pro-race. See more like this.