How this Simple Yet Powerful Method Helps Boost My Happiness
This has become my go-to tool in my emotional toolbox
Visiting my parents after six long years was joyful but alas, the 3-week vacation was over in a heartbeat.
I held myself together until I hugged my 85-year-old father goodbye and walked into the airport.
Then I fell apart.
Have you seen a woman bawling her eyes out, her nose leaking, and mascara streaking?
Suffice to say, it’s not a pretty sight. But then again, hearts breaking seldom are and that’s what it felt like as the plane took off and headed across the ocean to Boston Logan.
Halfway through the seemingly interminable flight, I sought solace in a happy experience I had hardwired into my brain. The experience in question was the lunch I had with my parents prior to my flight.
My father wanted to try a Mcdonald's chicken sandwich with fries while my 80-year-old mom opted for traditional fare. So I got a tray for my father from the Mcdonald's counter and escorted my mom to the other end of the food court where the counter serving her fave food was located. Apparently, my father couldn’t stop himself after taking a bite of the juicy burger so by the time my mom and I returned with our trays, he was looking like the cat that ate the canary!😺
For dessert, I treated my parents to something special -waffles with maple syrup (not common fare in my country except maybe for the rich folks). They had never tried maple syrup before and thought it delicious!
Long story short, it gave me great joy to share those moments with my parents. And more importantly, I have the feelings from this experience stored in an easy-to-retrieve place.
Each time I am sad, upset or scared, I whip it right out and immerse myself in the positive feelings. The results are instantaneous!
Game changer or what?
Hardwiring Happiness is a simple method that uses the hidden power of everyday experiences to build new neural structures full of happiness, love, confidence, and peace.
For example, I used to wallow in negative feelings caused by bad experiences — specifically my divorce and the circumstances that led up to it. They used to stick to me like thick, sticky honey until I learned how to change my thought and the feelings associated with them.
It is a simple 3-step process:
1. Think about an experience that feels good (in the story above, I thought about something that made me happy)
2. Stay with it for 10–20 seconds so you can get the full effect of the experience
3. As you let the positive experience soak into you, it slowly becomes part of you and the thought is transformed into a positive feeling.
🎈Congratulations, you have rewired your brain with that positive experience!
It took me a month to recover from the grief of parting.
Each time I felt the tears threaten, I, fortunately, had another hardwired happy experience to help me through. It was from the time my boyfriend came to pick me up from the airport. I was touched that he made a special effort to be on time (which doesn’t happen often) because he didn’t want me waiting after the long flight. It was so nice to feel his arms around me once again and to inhale that familiar, soothing scent of his skin.
Hardwiring that positive experience buoyed me through my grief by immediately bringing a smile to my face and sending feel-good vibes coursing through my body.
How about you? How do you hardwire happiness?
These are 3 reads I enjoyed this week:
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