How often do we connect with the superior self?
After so many years, today I go to church. I’m going to light a candle for those who are no longer alive. I am looking for a place where I can feel gentleness and connection. I am looking for a place that will give life to my soul. I am looking for a good and pleasant energy. I no longer find it in vacations, in material things or in successes. I can no longer find it in my daily routine. I can no longer find it in sports, I can no longer find it in books. I remember that I always felt a discomfort in the church, as if I didn’t deserve to be there. This happened when I was rejected by the priest for the sharing ritual with bread soaked in wine. I was only 15 years old and my period had come in the church. I was hurt by the priest’s behavior and the fact that he allowed himself to make me feel like a dirty person. Only when you love a higher being and its earthly transpositions are so locked. My religion is Christian and with all due respect, I feel that it is a religion full of loathing and rejection. A religion prepared to punish cruelly. We all seek the superior embrace and a decent communication with those who represent God. However, it does not always happen. I believe in my soul and goodness. I believe that everything will pass and that I made a mistake just to survive physically and mentally in a dubious environment. I believe that the higher being will connect with me totally. I feel God in me and I feel the peace I seek only when I am with Him. I don’t just feel the peace, I feel that he listens to me and offers me solutions, fulfills my wishes and settles my life. God loves me. I wish you to be as loved by your God no matter what form you consider Him to be.