Embarrassing Moments

At The Edge of the Pool Frantically Waving to Me

How could I know he was trying to save me some embarrassment

Sooner or later, most of us will encounter an embarrassing moment we’d love to forget. Mine happened in a swimming pool shortly after my second marriage.

Florida vacation

After my new husband and I arrived in Florida for a vacation during one of its hottest seasons, we were anxious to take advantage of the refreshing outdoor pool.

Before leaving our hotel room, we donned our bathing suits and cover-ups, readying ourselves for a little swimming after a quick dinner. Although we were hot and tired, eating was a priority after an exhausting trip.

Dinner was perfect, we felt rejuvenated, and we headed outdoors. We found two lounge chairs poolside next to each other as it was dinner hour, so the pool wasn’t that crowded.

We sat for a while and digested before hitting the water, but it was hot and the water was beckoning to me.

Great new bikini

Before the trip, I had purchased this beautiful, flower-designed, stretchy bikini stitched in such a way that the material looked puckered. That was the style of many blouses at that time, and I was elated to find it in a bathing suit.

Having never worn the suit before, I had no idea how well it would hold up once it was wet, but it was sold as a bathing suit, so why should I think twice about it?

The one blouse I have made of that material becomes heavy when wet and needs to be wrung out. It made sense that the bathing suit would do the same, but it never occurred to me at that time.

Before long, I jumped into the pool and began swimming back and forth. My husband was more of a dunker than a swimmer and decided to sit at the edge of the pool with his feet in the water.

I glanced over at him a few times, still sitting there with a drink in his hand, watching me swim past. Collecting the little umbrellas out of the drinks made him happier than jumping into the water.

At some point, I got tired of swimming, turned around, and started floating with little backstrokes here and there. The water was a perfect temperature, the air was warm and humid, and the sun was going down — it was a lovely first night.

As I was keeping myself afloat, I noticed my husband standing up, probably preparing to walk over to the stand to buy us more drinks, or maybe he was hot enough to jump in.

He’s waving to me

Instead of heading for the refreshment stand, he stood at the edge of the pool and started waving at me. “How cute he is!” I thought to myself, waving back.

Then he waved again, so I waved back too.

Isn’t that sweet? He can’t keep his eyes off me. What a perfect gentleman I married! He was so generous, always planning these amazing trips for us and concerned for my well-being.

Now he’s just being silly — he’s waving both arms at me frantically as if there’s a shark in the water or something.

Still floating on my back, I give him a “What the heck?” sign with my hands. He starts pointing at his chest, then pointing at me. Is he using some kind of sign language? What is he trying to tell me?

Maybe we haven’t been married long enough for me to know his hand signals, because whatever it is he’s trying to tell me, I have no clue. What an odd thing to do. Why doesn’t he just yell over to me instead of making what looks like he’s landing an airplane?

Still floating on my back, I give him the Italian “Hey, what’s up?” with my right hand, you know the one, palm up, tips of your fingers touching, and a firm shake of the arm.

What’s wrong with him? Now, he’s very demonstrably pointing at his chest, then at me, then at his chest, then back at me. Why is he pointing at his chest, or is he pointing to my chest, and why is some guy standing at the edge of the pool staring at me with a grin on his face?

It finally dawned on me to look down — and there it was — my right breast, out of my bathing suit, floating above my chest for all to see, and this guy was enjoying every minute of it!

Yep, my husband was pointing to my chest, alright! How embarrassing!

The bathing suit I bought, my beautiful, new pucker-style bikini, became so heavy that it slipped right off of me.

As I pulled it back on, I realized the material had become waterlogged and was not very practical for its intended purpose. Who knew? Well, I should have remembered what happened to the blouse when I washed it, but I didn’t.

I did wonder how many other women bought that bikini and what their story was.

Memorable vision

My new bathing suit was thrown out that night. I was lucky to have brought my old bathing suit with me on the trip. Carrying two has become a habit of mine so that I can wear one while the other dries completely, as I despise putting on a damp bathing suit.

The embarrassment stayed with me for the rest of that trip and far beyond.

The picture of my husband standing at the side of the pool, waving at me, is an image I’ll never forget, any more than the image he probably has of my floating breast — baring itself to an unintended but seemingly pleased audience!

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