How my ex was somewhat linguistically challenged in English.
One day on a business trip out of town Just as I parked my car in the main square she said she was desperate for a pee. Running late for a meeting, I told her to look around the square, for sure there would be a public toilet somewhere nearby.
An hour later I returned to the car to see my ex still sat in it, clearly distressed, with her legs tightly crossed.
"What happened, no toilet?"
"No, there isn't one anywhere ."
I looked out and spotted a small building with a sign 'Public Convenience' a hundred yards away.
"There you go," I said, "toilets."
"Where?"
"Where it says 'Public Convenience'."
"Well it's not very bloody convenient if it doesn't say toilets is it." she grumbled as she slammed the car door so hard it almost broke the window.

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