How Much Of Your Life Have You Spent In Failed Relationships?
Play along with the numbers game!
Do we live for relationships, or are they just disruptions to being single?
A failed relationship doesn’t mean it was terrible. It was good, or it was bad. We all have a 50/50 chance of having either.
I still miss my last relationship terribly, and it’s been more than three years. It’s not like I’m hung up on it and will never get past it. No, it’s not like that. I thought it was a good relationship until the very end. It’s just that he didn’t.
I’ve had a few dates and a lot of liaisons since then, but no matches.
I hate math and numbers, but I like to do statistical analyses. Go figure. So I decided to look at my life in percentages as either being single or in a relationship. So follow along with me with your own numbers. Learn how much time you’ve been single. It’s really fun!
Relationship #1: This was a marriage to a woman. It started when I was 26 and ended at 40. If I just take the part of my life up to 40, at that time I had spent 35% of my life in that marriage! No comment on the marriage.
Relationship #2: This was my first gay relationship. It lasted for eight years, from 1999 to 2007. In 2007, I had spent 16% of my life in this relationship. It didn’t necessarily end amicably, but we’re best of friends now.
Relationship #3: After three years of being single (which wasn’t so bad), I had my second gay relationship from 2010 to 2018. This lasted until I was 60, so at that time, this represented 13% of my life.
Now 64, it’s a difficult age to be single. I don’t feel my age nor look “old,” but some in their 30s or 40s may beg to differ. (Except the ones who chase daddies!)
So 47% of my life has been spent being in a relationship. That doesn’t seem like much. What do you think? How does that compare to you?
According to World Population Review, about 50% of married couples in the U.S. divorce. There you have it. Nothing much new.
FUN FACT: The states where you are most likely to get a divorce are Arkansas, Oklahoma, Nevada, New Mexico, and Kentucky.
ANOTHER FUN FACT: The states where you are least likely to get a divorce are Maine, the District of Columbia, South Dakota, Pennsylvania, and New York.
The U.S. marriage rate fell to an all-time low in 2019, and they tumbled again in 2020. (This year, they are up, most likely due to pent-up demand.)
If you’re happy in your relationship, good! If you’re single and you don’t want to be, plan on racking up lots of time online (swiping left for the most part) and putting yourself in situations that may not be comfortable. I’m also not that much of a proponent of “love will find you when you’re not looking.” You know the end-game here. Do we settle? Or do we keep working it?
Commentary on love life is not exactly my forte, but maybe I’ll work on it a little bit more since I’ve been so successful in my relationships.
In the meantime, you could always read these:
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