How I’ve Found Freedom Through Being Vulnerable

Being vulnerable isn’t easy. When you start, though, it’s hard to stop.

I was never one to share much of myself on the internet. I’d occasionally tweet something out about a girl I thought was cute, or maybe something about being upset. But mostly, I was just giving my takes on sports and keeping everything else inside.

Over the past year, though, I’ve become more vulnerable. It’s helped me, and I think it’s helping others, too.

Last year, I became quite interested in a girl I worked with. Over time, I let it take over my mind and spirit. My mind was clouded for a significant part of the year because of my minor obsession with being with this girl.

After an entire spring and summer of getting worked up about this, I finally came to a breaking point and stopped talking to her. I figured myself out and realized how crazy I was being.

I worked hard to “fix” myself, getting into a workout routine, writing every day, and reading a lot more.

In the books I read, YouTube videos I watched, and podcasts I listened to, I could pull out a ton of gems from people’s personal stories. Hearing so many accounts of the similar struggles I was going through helped give me a blueprint for escaping my sad and negative frame of mind.

After a few months of making these discoveries, I finally started working on my story. I began publishing stories on Medium about overcoming my struggles and even wrote a book detailing what had been bringing me down.

Doing that for a few months made me realize something: telling others my story isn’t all that scary, and most people appreciate the fact that I have done so. There has been no criticism and a lot of respect given.

While I wasn’t successful in how Jordan Peterson, David Goggins, Joe Rogan, or others that I had been listening to were, I was successful in my own way. I overcame a personal, unique challenge and was an expert on what I had done. I felt like I could help people in how the people listed above had helped me.

I have yet to have someone come to me and say that I really helped them get through something, but that’s OK. Whether I have isn’t super important to me.

Don’t get me wrong. My intention is to help people. But I have realized that not everyone will be vulnerable like I have been, even if I was the one that helped them. There may be a bunch of people that I have helped get through something, but those people aren’t always willing to just come out and say it. I understand that and don’t need the praise or appreciation to feel like I’m doing good work.

Another medium I have turned to is YouTube. My videos get next to no views, but again, I don’t need the attention. Reaching a large audience would be great so I could help more people, and I know I will. But for now, telling my story is the intention and I feel good about what I have done to this point.

Having control over my story and not worrying about the ramifications of releasing it into the world has freed me. I no longer care what people think. I am no longer held down by my thoughts and emotions. I release them into the wind and let them fly away.

Now, I am the happiest I have ever been. Being vulnerable isn’t always easy. But once you start, it’s hard to stop.