How I Overcame My Fear of Dogs
How I conquered fear and received unconditional love
When I was a kid, I used to be afraid of dogs. My heart would drop, whenever I would see one. I viewed dogs as demons that somehow crawled out of hell. I thought that they were bound to do damage to people if they weren’t cautious. Growing up I heard many stories about dog attacks. Dogs would chase people down and harm them very often. I thought if I wasn’t cautious enough, they would do damage to me the same way. As a result, I never went near one. When I started elementary school, my siblings and I began riding the school bus. My parents were working full-time so they told us that they wouldn’t be able to take us to school anymore. They explained to me and my siblings, we would have to start taking the bus. I never rode the bus before. At the time I wondered what riding the bus would be like. I imagined a lot of kids on the bus acting a fool. I couldn’t wait to see what it would be like. This became a big deal for us. We couldn’t wait to transition to a different source of transportation. The day came, it was time for us to ride the bus. My siblings and I awaited at the bus stop for our scheduled time. We were used to taking our car to school and watching the other kids ride the bus, yet here we were waiting for the school bus. We heard the bus coming around the corner, we started to walk toward the location where the bus would be making its stop. The bus came to a complete stop and the doors would then open up for us. When we got on, we greeted the bus driver and worked our way down the bus aisle. Everyone seemed to be at ease. They could tell they had new faces walking on. The bus driver waited until we sat down in our designated seats. We then drove off to pick up the rest of the students and be on our way to school. Our school was only 5 minutes away from home, but the trip would take longer because we had to pick up the other students. It was intriguing to watch the other students get on the bus, everyone was destined to receive their education.
When we returned from school, we told our parents about our experience. They were happy with the feedback we provided. Riding the bus would become convenient for us and they knew it. They felt if they could establish trust between the school and the bus drivers then everything would be just fine. They would be able to work and have more time to cater to themselves as well. Riding the bus became the norm for us. Every day we had to wake up early and perform our morning routines to prepare for school. We would wait every morning at the bus stop and once school was over, we would get right back on to go home. Our bus stop was located at the end of my street. We would have to walk down the road to get to the bus stop and after school, we would get off the bus to walk back home. It was a brisk walk, not necessarily far. I actually enjoyed the walks. It helped me clear my mind before attending class and also helped me imagine what my day at school would be like. Additionally, it helped me reflect on my day, after a long day of learning and playing with friends.
One day my neighbors bought a dog. They named it Buddy. Buddy’s breed was a Jack Russell terrier. He was a beautiful white dog with brown spots. He was fast and loved to run around a lot. He would chase other people just for the sake of it. One day he tried to chase me, I was afraid, so I ran away. My speed compared to his was no match. Buddy was an athletic dog. There were times when I would watch him through my bedroom window, I wanted to know if he was a threat. Buddy loved to chase. He didn’t care if it were people, objects, or other animals, he just loved to chase. Buddy would bark at people but most of them wouldn’t budge. To them, they knew a precious dog like him couldn’t possibly be harmless. I seemed to be the only kid on the block that was that afraid of him. My heart would race at just the sight of Buddy. I began to go outside less, fearing he would do to me the same things I witnessed happen to other people in my neighborhood. Though these were not drastic events, I feared he would harm me if I wasn’t cautious enough. They had named their dog “Buddy”, but to me, Buddy wasn’t no buddy, Buddy was a demon in disguise.
The next day was a school day. I would have to walk down my street and wait at the bus stop with my siblings. As I stood at the bus stop, I anticipated looking at my neighbor’s house to see if Buddy was outside or to see if he was running towards us. “I’m safe,” I said. No sign of Buddy.” The bus would come around the corner and my siblings and I would get on the bus. I was in the safe zone. I would get on the bus, and I wouldn’t have to worry about “Buddy” for the rest of the day. That was until the day would be over and it would be time to go home. One day as I was getting off the bus, I noticed Buddy was outside in the yard. I did not want to get off the bus because I feared that Buddy would harm me. I told my bus driver that he would just have to take me back to school because there was no way I was going to get off that bus. I told him that my parents would just have to come pick me up from school and that I wouldn’t mind waiting in the after-school program. As predicted, my bus driver denied my request and insisted that I get off the bus. He believed that “Buddy” wouldn’t cause any harm but if he does, he’ll be right here watching, ready to contact animal control. This gave me the courage to walk off the bus, but due to my fears creeping in, I ran all the way home and I didn’t look back. As I was running, I could hear Buddy’s footsteps gaining on me. My siblings then told me that Buddy was right on my tail with only seconds to spare. My parents would then complain about me running away from Buddy like that. They told me that it was unhealthy, and they feared I would trip, fall, and hurt myself. But I wasn’t too worried about that. I was worried about Buddy taking a bite right out of my ass. I started a habit of running away from “Buddy” whenever I saw him. If only I knew that this was the reason why he was chasing me. It would have brought me so much peace. Even though Buddy never did cause any damage to anyone, there were times when I felt I should have stayed and protected my other siblings instead of running away like a maniac. I should have had the courage to face my fears. This way, I would have realized that Buddy was no threat at all.
The fear of Buddy would continue. I would continue running away, avoiding, and remaining in the cage that I put myself into. I would dread indulging in the outdoor activities I used to do before my neighbors adopted Buddy. Activities such as, riding my bicycle, running, playing basketball, football, etc. The fear was eating me alive. There was a part of me that wanted to go outside and have fun but there was also another part of me that would refuse to do so. I was stuck in a loop of a never-ending hell. I stayed indoors while everyone else seemed to be unbothered by Buddy, I felt pathetic.
One day we were given the news that Buddy had gotten hit by a car. This left us shocked. Buddy was known for running in the streets very often, and one day it was too late for a driver to stop. They had not seen Buddy due to how fast they were going or possibly how small Buddy was at the time. Buddy’s owners were devastated. They didn’t even have him for that long. Buddy would bring joy to his family even though sometimes he would cause trouble to the nearby neighbors. I felt deep compassion. No animal should have died in such a way. Though Buddy’s death was traumatizing for many people, there was a part of me that was slightly glad he had passed away. After his passing, there was a sense of peace that roamed throughout the neighborhood. Neighbors could now walk down our street without the fear of getting barked at or mulled. The tension he created had been cleared. We all could now experience the peace of walking home again. This was a peace we longed for. The only times we got to experience it were on occasions when Buddy would be inside his house.
Buddy was here and then he was gone. He came and then he went. At a young age, this seemed unreal to me. There were days when I would check to see if he was outside before I got on the bus, but he was never there. Never there to chase us anymore, never there to bark at us anymore, and never there to make any more memories with us again. Though I was afraid of Buddy, I realized a lot about him after his death. Buddy was Mortal, he had a life just like the one we all have. Buddy was simply living in the moment when one day a car came to take his life away. His death made me realize that life could all be gone in an instant. The ones around you will soon vanish so cherish the moments you have with them while they are here. Buddy didn’t know he would die that day. It was unfortunate to witness that poor family lose Buddy the way they did. I feel deep remorse for pet owners who forge an emotional connection with their pets, then have to go through the pain of losing them. Long Live the dog of my precious childhood, I will never forget you.
After Buddy died, I promised myself that I would get over my fear of dogs. Otherwise, I would just remain a coward who could never get over his fear. I became frustrated every time these thoughts would creep up into my mind. I began thinking that maybe there was something wrong with me, that I may not ever be able to get over my fear due to the fact Buddy died. Many thoughts were beginning to roam through my mind. How could this be? How could I have been running away from such a precious animal? One day I stumbled over a quote that stated, “to get over your fears, you must face your fears.” I found this quote very inspiring. It simply made the connection that I needed all along. I realized that I would then have to face my fears. I made sure to make the most of every opportunity I had whenever I came across a dog. It would be my chance to overcome my fear of dogs.
Coincidently, at the time, my dad had a friend named Renold. Renold had a Female Havanese that had just recently given birth to a litter of puppies. He asked my dad if he would like one of the puppies. He told my dad he could come over to take a look at the new litter. My dad then went over to his house after work to go see the new pups. My dad fell in love with the new litter. He wanted to get one, yet he was hesitant because he didn’t know if it would be a good fit for our family. He told Reynold that he would talk to my mom about it and let him know in advance. My parents then had a conversation about whether we should get the puppy. They then concluded, they would get the puppy as long as we agreed to take care of it and nurture it. We agreed!
We began reading different books about dogs in our school library. We started watching different animal TV shows which would educate us more about dogs. Shows like Dog Whisper and other shows on animal planet. We started searching for different pet supplies that might be beneficial for our new puppy. The day came, my dad would go pick up the puppy and bring him home. At first, I was excited but then I became terrified. My past fears began to take over. Once the puppy entered the door, I went running away. I didn’t want to be near it. I couldn’t wrap my head around why I kept being afraid. I decided maybe if I gave myself some time, then maybe one day I’ll be confident enough to just let it happen naturally. For the time being my fears continued. I would avoid Joe the same way I would avoid Buddy. It was just something about dogs that didn’t sit right with me, I just didn’t know why. At times when he would run up to me, I would feel a bit frightened because I didn’t know if he was happy or mad at me for avoiding him. I then realized that he just wanted to play. That’s all puppies ever wanted to do, play. Was that too much a puppy could ask for? I realized that dogs weren’t all that scary. They were harmless. As I began opening up to Joe, it was already too late. My parents were already plotting on giving him back to Reynold because they didn’t think we were mature enough to raise him. And they also thought I still had a fear for Joe, though sometimes I tried to conceal it. Joe was gone faster than we could all say bye. During this time, I would reflect on everything that had occurred. I became emotional, we could have made so many good memories together. Though this removed the weight of me having to face my fears, it then became pointless for me to put such a goal over my head without any avail.
When we got older my brother decided that he wanted to get a new dog. There was a lot of stress in the house at the time, so he suggested if we got a dog, maybe things could calm down a bit and everyone could become level-headed again. He posted a Snapchat asking if anyone was selling a dog. Then someone responded, and they offered him a free Pitbull. I was a bit skeptical, I thought if they were giving the dog away for free then maybe there was something wrong with it. My brother insisted that we at least take a look. He felt that this could be a great opportunity for us. The owner of the Pitbull puppy he was conversing with, would send us more information and pictures. My brother was convinced. We met up with the woman at a nearby plaza, where she greeted us, informed us, and introduced us to the Pitbull puppy. We then decided to name her Lee. We thought it would be a good fit for her. She seemed quite shy at first; she was afraid to walk toward us. I felt compassion for her, I wanted her to know she could trust us. She then had the courage to come to us. My brother and I ended up taking her in. We made sure she felt at home. We made a stop at his job and as soon as we got out, she ended up taking a fat shit in the middle of the parking lot. Luckily, we came prepared, we were able to pick up the shit and toss it in the trash. We cleaned her up and headed straight home.
Our parents had not known that we decided to get a dog. We planned to surprise them once we got back with our new puppy. As we pulled into the driveway, we were a bit nervous. We didn’t know what our parent’s reaction would be, but we were willing to fight to keep Lee. We then notified our sisters, and they came running with joy and insisted that we bring her in. My parents were speechless. They insisted the puppy go back to wherever it came from. They doubted we would be responsible enough to maintain the puppy and nurture its needs. We were destined to prove them wrong. We informed them that we would take care of her and that it wasn’t much work for us to do. My parents became quiet, it was almost spooky. We didn’t know if they would try to get rid of the dog themselves or if they would let us keep her. Days passed and Lee was still here with us. She was kept safe downstairs and was given food, water, and toys to keep her company.
Lee was beginning to trust us. Love and affection were beginning to form, and we were not taking it for granted. Since there was no fence in our backyard at the time, we had to walk her outside with a leash every day to use the bathroom. Otherwise, she could have escaped. Every day my siblings and I would take her outside. There were days when I would dread taking her outside due to the weather or if I just didn’t get enough sleep that night. This led me to form a bond with the new puppy. My perspective began to change as I realized animals have their own needs as well. It feels good to nurture another living organism. It provides you with a deep sense of contribution to life. Through this process, we were showering her with proper love and acts of kindness. Every time we would show her acts of love, she would be appreciative of our actions, and would reciprocate her love in return. This was doing something to my family. She was beginning to heal our emotional wounds while providing us with emotional reassurance. We began to make more memories together. She truly is a blessing, and we are so lucky to have her. We attend to her needs whenever she wishes. She is the family’s princess, and I am thankful to have her as a pet. Without her, I may have still been afraid of dogs. I would not be who I am today without her.
Dogs symbolize unconditional love, and they should be cherished and nourished. Dogs love unconditionally; they were created to be this way. Loving Lee on a daily basis taught me how to love freely. She has carved a deeper love into my heart. I now have a profound love for life. I appreciate the love she provides; without her I’d be a completely different person. Owning a dog can improve your overall well-being. Dogs accompany us and make us feel less alone. They reduce our stress levels and boost our endorphins. Dogs lower our blood pressure. They improve our responses to stress and help us navigate our emotions. They help us cope with life crises. Overall dogs are beneficial for humanity, this must be why they became known as man’s best friend.
Unfortunately, some people may never reap the benefits of cherishing a dog. They may never get to experience the love these wonderful pets have to offer. Cherishing Lee has indeed carved a deeper love into my heart. She has helped me to understand the meaning of love, and what the power of love can do. She makes the love flow swiftly within our home. She is the love meter of our family. Every day we express our love for her, and she expresses her love for us in return. She expresses her love in ways for which I am forever thankful.
Lee and I have a spiritual connection. It has been forming ever since the day we met. Dogs are spiritual beings. They are free-spirited and their energy is pure and divine. They were created to love unconditionally and because of this, they have a direct connection to the ultimate source of love. In the book, “Mystical Dogs”, Jean Houston implies “Dogs are holy guides to the unseen worlds.” They simply allow us to tap into the energies that can’t be seen with our own eyes. They stretch our horizons and prompt us to question ourselves and our existence. In the Christian religion, it’s stated that God can speak to you every day through your interactions with dogs. They serve as messengers sent from God while providing us with spiritual insights.
Dogs exhibit an abundance of spiritual qualities such as compassion, loyalty, courage, and unconditional love. They provide us with validation such as, you are loved, you are protected, you are guided by divine higher power. They help us realize that love is all around us. They are simply one of life’s wisest teachers. Dogs have the power to help heal our emotional trauma. They are full of wisdom and are always ready to teach us a lesson. We must be receptive to these lessons, otherwise, we may never unlock our full potential in life. The power dogs have to heal is astounding. When you are open and present, you will then be able to receive the spiritual connection your dogs have to offer.
Maintaining a spiritual connection with your dog leads to a higher understanding of each other. This may give you both the ability to read each other’s minds. As my spiritual connection with Lee began to strengthen, my conscience began to increase. She had been communicating with me all along. Lee communicates through her body language and also through her vocalizations. These consist of different body movements, facial expressions, tail carriage, barking, whining, sweating, etc. Dogs have the ability to communicate with us from the spiritual world. The challenge is to remain present and try to comprehend what they are trying to share with you. Reside in the moment and you’ll be receptive to the mystical realms dogs have to offer.
