How 3 Years of Chronic Pain Made Me a Better Person

My journey helped me overcome fear, anger, loneliness, and a deep depression.

To say the past 3 years have been challenging for me is a huge understatement.

Without a doubt… it has been the most difficult chapter of my life.

And I have been pushed near the edge of a dangerous precipice a few times.

And it’s not over.

I’m still working my way through the pain and emotions, as well as the impact they are having in every sector of my life.

But two things are for sure…

Every day is a battle I can win…. and I’ll never stop fighting.

Before I go on let me make a few things clear.

First, I’m not dying. What I’m dealing with has been difficult and devastating but as far as I know my life is not in immediate peril.

Second, I am not looking for sympathy. Believe me. I’ve felt sorry for myself plenty of times over the past 3 years. That bucket is full. Probably overflowing.

Third, I’m not comparing my pain to that of anyone else. I recognize that all pain is painful and I’m in no way trying to rank who’s had the toughest road.

Finally, millions of Americans and people around the world struggle with severe health issues and life-threatening [ailments] every day. I am writing this article in the hopes that it helps even one fellow sufferer deal with their pain more efficiently and receive some much-needed hope.

If you are struggling with pain, it is my sincere hope that you get something out of this article.

Even if one thing helps you. That would make every word worth it.

“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.” — Ancient Proverb

What I’ve been going through

Here’s a summary of what has happened to me.

Not a complete track record for sure but these are the highlights… a boatload of “lowlights.”

At the end of 2020, I contracted Covid. And let me tell you that Wuhan Clan is not a group you want to hang with.

A little time had passed — about 3 months — and I started getting bad headaches. Rally bad headaches.

Now they call it Long Haulers or a phrase similar to that. I’m one of the longest haulers because I haven’t stopped hauling.

Anyway, the worst part was I was having headaches every day.

Also, I had no clue what it felt like to deal with a tension headache or migraine.

This was the first time in my life I experienced a migraine. and I started getting a bunch of them. So yeah, that sucked.

Over the next couple of months the headaches and migraines were getting bad enough that I was starting to struggle in every area of life.

I was having issues at work. I was having issues at home. I was having issues feeling human. I was having issues finding hope.

All aspects of life were becoming a challenge.

Even the little things.

I was dealing with severe pain every day and so often that my brain was being overloaded with pain signals. So basically, I was becoming a zombie (except for the whole eating other humans thing).

What I was being forced to deal with was my body breaking down. I was beginning to have extreme pain and pressure in my head coupled with a ridiculously high level of facial, neck, back, and hip pain.

Everything was pain.

And it was starting to affect everything.

Rather than go into a long-winded explanation and showcase my recent and very sad medical history… suffice it to say this, I was only in the early stages of massive, debilitating pain.

There was still a long way to go. After struggling with numerous, numerous symptoms for long periods, I would think to myself… it can’t get any worse than this.

I was an idiot. I was dead wrong. Wait, uh… that sounds bad. I was very, very wrong.

For the next 2 years, I would experience 4 or 5 cycles of increasing pain and symptoms and devolving body functions and relationships.

Basically, I was circling the drain.

“Tough times never last, but tough people do.” — Robert H. Schuller

The Lowlights

👎I was in so much pain I started having trouble doing my 9–5 job.

👎I stopped working on my relationships.

👎I gave almost nothing to my wife and kids.

👎I internalized everything holding it all inside.

👎I gave up all hope of being helped or healed.

👎I nearly stopped living (not suicide mind you). I started thinking that no one else on the planet knew what I was going through.

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” — Ernest Hemingway

Things I’ve learned through my suffering

• Humor may be the best medicine. I’m not sure but in my case, it was a pretty good way to deal with my ongoing pain. I got humor and was already pretty bloody funny… but I seriously upped my game.
• I am tougher than I thought. Although I had plenty of moments of weakness, I was able to endure a lot. A LOT. And I survived and came out stronger.
• There is always someone worse off… and they’re all around. Whenever I feel down about my health issues, I think of what others are struggling with.
• It’s not about me.
• It’s not about me.
• It’s not about me.
• Feeling sorry for myself only drove me deeper and deeper. I’m done feeling sorry for myself.
• My journey can be helpful to others. What I’m walking around with every day can be a positive… it can be helpful to others struggling with how to deal with chronic pain.

“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger

The Highlights

👏I greatly increased my determination, grit, and learned how to make better use of my time.

👏I am stronger than ever mentally.

👏I have more energy — or I have learned to create energy when I seem to have none.

👏I found a therapy/rehabilitation that seems to be working… and may someday lead me to be pain free (the therapy is called dry needling). If you’re suffering from chronic pain… look into it and see if it applies to your situation.

👏I learned to give my loved ones the best I have each and every day… even if that’s only 2%.

“You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.” — Bob Marley

The Recap

• My life sucked
• It was only pain pain pain
• Then I got better

The Real Recap

• There are many in the world suffering from chronic pain. Each of us encounters someone like that daily… whether we know it or not. And I am one of them.
• Although chronic pain can be devastating and debilitating, it is possible to gain mental and physical strength to deal with it.
• We have to change our view on chronic pain. Viewing it as empowering rather than debilitating can go a long, long way in your life.
• I recently found a therapy — dry needling — that is helping me understand the sources of my pain and has begun to reduce it. I hope to be pain-free (or close to it) by March 2024 (or sooner).
• My journey dealing with chronic pain can be used to help others. If you’re dealing with chronic pain like me, use your story to help others.